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Have you ever had a co worker stopped talking to you for no reason?


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Mizz Layta

There was this gentle man at my work who was always chatty with me.Then one day I noticed that he wasn't as talkative and I was the one started to say hi first .He would respond but the energy and the vibe wasn't the same anymore.He even told me that if I need anything to be fixed on my car , I should let him know so he can take me to his mechanic.He knows allot about cars so I won't get ripped off.Now he just went cold for no reason

 

There were time where I would go to sit on his table during break time and he won't say hi or anything but then when someone else walks by he would say hi and talk to them and you can tell the vibe and energy is different.I stopped saying hi and now we don't talk at all unless of its neccessary.Then again we work in different departments so its seldom that I have to talk to him.

 

We never had any argument or conflict .I can't think of anything I have said that offended him.I know I shoudn't care but its just now awkward running into him and he doesn't say anything or look at me.

 

Have you ever had someone stopped talking to you for no apparent reason?

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yeah, its happened quite a few times. I have no clue why. Sometimes I feel like work is like being back in junior high again. Someone is friendly/talks to me, then gives me the cold shoulder for no reason that I could think of. Its ridiculous! That's why, I no longer make the effort to talk to anyone/get close to anyone, except on occasion do small talk and that's it.

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I recently stopped talking to two coworkers because I overheard them mumbling things about me during a meeting. :(

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yes.

 

Contingent on how they are integrated in job title I allow things to unfold.

 

I say this not proudly yet when I had personal problems I stopped the friendly chit chat and clocked in and out. most co workers care little anyway... so onward and chip upward.

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La.Primavera
last time i decided to wait in my car for him to arrive in the parking lot.I decided to go inside the bulding the same time he arrived to make it look like a coincidence.When i got into the bulding he was waiting on the elevator as i expected.I am shy so i froze up and said good morning to him as i was passing by and said it back.He looked uncomfotable,i dont know if its just me.Then today i was in my car parked in the parking lot at work since i arrived at work early.He then drove in and it looked like he was going to park beside my car He glanced towards me then he parked on the other side which my car was facing.When he got out his car ,he didnt look towards the direction at my car which was fairly close to where he parked.I know he saw me .He kept walking,i thought he was going to wave or say hi since he clearly saw me.Maybe i am just reading too much into this.

 

 

Anyways,i noticed he avoids eye contact with me and he seems aloof than before.There was tension between us when i ran into him the elavor sometime later today and it felt awkward.Does he sense that i have crush on him even i havent made it obvious

How can we tell the different between a guy who is shy and the one who is just not interested?

 

He realized you had a crush and it made him uncomfortable. You weren't exactly subtle about it.

 

In your previous thread you said you found out he had a girlfriend. This explains why he is avoiding you now. Respect the fact that he is a good boyfriend and that he wasn't cruel enough to indulge your crush. He is doing the right thing.

 

It's time to move on and find a guy who is single and interested in you. You will be so much happier when you do.

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Mizz Layta
He realized you had a crush and it made him uncomfortable. You weren't exactly subtle about it.

 

In your previous thread you said you found out he had a girlfriend. This explains why he is avoiding you now. Respect the fact that he is a good boyfriend and that he wasn't cruel enough to indulge your crush. He is doing the right thing.

 

It's time to move on and find a guy who is single and interested in you. You will be so much happier when you do.

 

This guy is not the same guy that I have a crush on.I pretty much accepted that nothing will happen between us when I found out he has gf.I still have a crush on him but I respect the fact that he has gf.I don't expect anything to happen between us and hopefully time will help me to get over him.I hardly see him around these days anyways since he quit his full time position and now he is casual.

 

However, I dont have a crush on this man. This is a totally different sitution.I also socialize with other co workers you know

 

This guy is married and he even showed me a pic of his wife. Our interactions are strictly platonic.I only like him as friend nothing more.I also have other male co workers that I friendly with and nothing more.

 

I think its funny how you just assumed it was the other guy I have a crush on and quoted my older thread about him when it has nothing to do with what's this thread about. They are 2 different co workers that has anothing to do with either situation.

 

The reason why I am questioning why this guy stopped talking to me is I like to be civil with my co worker and not create any tension or uncomfotable enviroment in a work place.

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pink_sugar

Yes, I have these 2 guys at work who pretty much started to ignore me several months ago. No idea why. I'm not interested in them or anything, but it is a small workplace and they are the only 2 that pretty much do not acknowledge me unless prompted. I don't think everyone needs to be friends at work, but it is strange how they joke around with you from day 1 and suddenly act as if you don't exist. My workplace is pretty close knit too, but I prefer not to get too close to people in the workplace anyways unless there is that one person who I just happen to get along with well. I just want to get my work done and go about my day without drama.

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stillafool
I know I shoudn't care but its just now awkward running into him and he doesn't say anything or look at me.

 

 

No reason to feel awkward he's the one who stopped speaking. Just walk past him, say hi and keep it moving. You don't even have to speak to him if you don't want to.

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Mizz Layta
Yes, I have these 2 guys at work who pretty much started to ignore me several months ago. No idea why. I'm not interested in them or anything, but it is a small workplace and they are the only 2 that pretty much do not acknowledge me unless prompted. I don't think everyone needs to be friends at work, but it is strange how they joke around with you from day 1 and suddenly act as if you don't exist. My workplace is pretty close knit too, but I prefer not to get too close to people in the workplace anyways unless there is that one person who I just happen to get along with well. I just want to get my work done and go about my day without drama.

 

I agree with you but they are people that I am friendly towards with at work.We pretty much just say hi to each other and just have a casual chat about work weather etc.we sit together on luch break in the staff room.That's how it was between me and this guy.Now he doesn't say hi or look at me when he seea me but he will say hi to the other person. which is odd

 

 

So do these 2 guys respond when you say hi and talk to them but they just don't initiate conversations anymore?

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Now that I see your second post, I'm assuming he's stopped talking because he knows you have a crush on him and he doesn't want to encourage you.

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Mizz Layta
Now that I see your second post, I'm assuming he's stopped talking because he knows you have a crush on him and he doesn't want to encourage you.

 

ok didn't you read my earlier post? I clearly stated that I do not have a crush on this man and the one I have a crush on is someone different that has nothing to do with this situation.

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pink_sugar
I agree with you but they are people that I am friendly towards with at work.We pretty much just say hi to each other and just have a casual chat about work weather etc.we sit together on luch break in the staff room.That's how it was between me and this guy.Now he doesn't say hi or look at me when he seea me but he will say hi to the other person. which is odd

 

 

So do these 2 guys respond when you say hi and talk to them but they just don't initiate conversations anymore?

 

They do usually respond, but not always. We used to have friendly conversations and used to joke around, but now they only communicate with me when they have to about work. Whatever drama is going on you don't need it. Just go about your day as normal and maybe just say hi when you cross paths.

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This guy is not the same guy that I have a crush on.I pretty much accepted that nothing will happen between us when I found out he has gf.I still have a crush on him but I respect the fact that he has gf.I don't expect anything to happen between us and hopefully time will help me to get over him.I hardly see him around these days anyways since he quit his full time position and now he is casual.

 

Your words.

 

This is not from another thread. It is from your subsequent post in THIS thread, which I read before replying, of course.

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Mizz Layta
Your words.

 

This is not from another thread. It is from your subsequent post in THIS thread, which I read before replying, of course.

 

The other guy I have crush on still talks to me whenever I see him.We just say hi and go on about our business.Like what I said I hardly see him around these days since he only works part time.No hard feelings between us

 

 

However this guy in is thread that stopped talking to me is a different dude. I don't why you guys keep bringing up my crush into this thread when it has nothing to do with him

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Maybe he saw how you were acting with your crush and decided to shut it down before you got one on him too. I work with a woman now that most of the men in the office avoid for that very reason.

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Mizz Layta
Maybe he saw how you were acting with your crush and decided to shut it down before you got one on him too. I work with a woman now that most of the men in the office avoid for that very reason.

 

Umm I can confirm that its not true because no one knows that I have a crush on the other guy.I didn't tell anyone nor have I made it obvious that I like him.I highly doubt that my crush is aware of it either.I kept my crush to myself because people gossip and he will find out. I never confessed my feelings to him.

 

I pretty much talked to him just like any other person. I am shy when it comes to that so I never made it obvious that I like him and I am glad that I didn't. He might sense that I like him but who knows. I am just glad I never made a move since I found out that he actually has gf

 

My crush and this man work in different departments and work opposite shifts.My crush has no connection to th is situation whatsoever

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whichwayisup

Well, you have a couple of options here. Just go on about your day and eventually in time you won't even notice him on your radar anymore. He'll just be a desk that you walk by past. Or, you calmly ask him if you did anything to upset or offend him? Then say you needed to ask because you've noticed he isn't speaking to you anymore and is avoiding you.

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Whether or not any of us have ever had someone stop talking to us is here nor there – each situation has different factors. OP, you are the one posting, YOU are the one with the problem. The guy doesn’t have to be chatty with you, he doesn’t have to look at you, and he doesn’t have to explain himself to you. All he has to do is communicate with you in matters related to mandatory business. When someone abruptly stops talking to someone there is always a reason – you might not admit it and you might not understand it or agree with it but that is your problem. You can continue to waste time wondering and speculating but my advice is to do your job and go on about your life/business.

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loverboy69
He might sense that I like him but who knows. I am just glad I never made a move since I found out that he actually has gf

 

Believe me those of us who are usually half way perceptive in life will feel a vibe from someone who likes us. It's usually very subtle and it's only welcome if we like you too. If we don't then we'll likely avoid you as to not lead you on and things might get weird. You shy people are a lot more obvious than you think because usually the awkwardness leaks out.

 

Back on topic though: The only reason it matters whether he ignores you or not is because you are interested in him in some way or fashion whether you admit it or not. Either you are attracted to him or desire some form of platonic friendship. If you didn't you wouldn't care or lose sleep over it.

 

There are many people in my life who I walk past everyday without saying a word to and I don't even bat an eye. It's only the ones who matter to me whose intentions or motives I would ever second guess.

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loverboy69

To the original question:

 

Yes I've had coworkers stop talking to me. 2 of them liked me so much that they went from friend to overly flirtatious to nervous to avoidance within a few weeks time. They both later confessed that I was perceived "out of their league," and they couldn't maintain a regular friendship with me because it hurt too much. One of them I'm dating now even though it took him a good year to get the courage to tell me what was on his mind. :)

 

Another co-worker stopped talking to me after he became insecure of my new position in relation to his because I landed the Director role he coveted. He was extremely jealous and bad mouthed me to my other colleagues. After I confronted him he then completely shut me out for over a year until he got over it. I still don't trust him but at least we're amicable.

 

Finally another co-worker stopped talking to me because she over heard me tell another colleague that she was a "big fan of Mc Donald's." She mistakenly assumed I was making reference to her large size because she is very overweight. I made the comment because even at 42 years of age she keeps all her happy meal toys as decorations all around her cubicle. Unfortunately we've never made amends and continues to make reference to me being a male whore even though I'm nothing of the sort.

Edited by loverboy69
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I had a crush on my female coworker, I stopped talking to her at some point because it made it worst when we talked a lot yet she had no idea of my intentions.

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I also think we need to make it clear that just because someone stop talking to a person does NOT mean they sense the other person likes/has a crush on them. Often they stop talking because they want as little as possible to do with the person. Why?? Who knows? The reason can be anything under the son but unless it affects work the other person better just get over it go on with their job/life.

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