Andy99 Posted March 15, 2015 Share Posted March 15, 2015 Hello, maybe a common problem here but new to me. I’m on the receiving end of a coworker’s unwanted attention. Every day they manage to surprise me with a new, nasty comment. I tried keeping a handwritten journal but they told me, “write in one hand sh*t in the other one, see whichever fills up first”. What to do? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 15, 2015 Share Posted March 15, 2015 GoPro or a strategically activated video camera on one's laptop or phone. Timestamps can easily be corroborated by site CCTV, should your business have that. Such will document time, location and content. If HR or 'the boss' doesn't listen, I'm sure a judge will be happy to advise them of why it's smart to listen, or perhaps pay out a lot of money in a toxic workplace lawsuit if they don't. Harassers are smart, generally, but they're also exposed. Use it. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted March 16, 2015 Share Posted March 16, 2015 It's not legal to record someone in many instances in the US and is actually a federal crime, if I am not mistaken. You could ask a coworker you trust the next time he sees this person talking to you to lurk nearby and be your witness. Of course, if the nasty person writes anything down, you've got him. Keep a log of everything the person is saying or doing, dated. At some point, you have to take it up the chain. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 16, 2015 Share Posted March 16, 2015 If the company has CCTV and employees are on the premises, they have agreed to be recorded. There is no expectation of privacy. Of course, a lawyer can argue anything about anything, but I never let their mouths interfere with what's right. They're just another mouth to fill with money to spout words. That said, OP, get very specific and learn the laws of your jurisdiction and use them against both the harasser and your employer if they overtly or tacitly support such behaviors. They're exposed and vulnerable. Be creative. There are always skeletons in closets and dead bodies buried. Or quit and use your life energy for more productive pursuits with people who don't harass you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 16, 2015 Share Posted March 16, 2015 Hello, maybe a common problem here but new to me. I’m on the receiving end of a coworker’s unwanted attention. Every day they manage to surprise me with a new, nasty comment. I tried keeping a handwritten journal but they told me, “write in one hand sh*t in the other one, see whichever fills up first”. What to do? Tape record him! Either set your phone up to record him or carry a voice activated recorder. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 16, 2015 Share Posted March 16, 2015 Hello, maybe a common problem here but new to me. I’m on the receiving end of a coworker’s unwanted attention. Every day they manage to surprise me with a new, nasty comment. I tried keeping a handwritten journal but they told me, “write in one hand sh*t in the other one, see whichever fills up first”. What to do? Who told you that? Have you complained to HR or a boss about the comments? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Otter2569 Posted March 16, 2015 Share Posted March 16, 2015 Where I work they take this stuff VERY seriously. You may have to go through your chain of command but do it and keep detailed notes. Key key is that "you dont feel comfortable", you express that and it keeps happening. In corporate America if you look at someone wrong you are in trouble so it blows me away when I hear what people do in the workplace. Link to post Share on other sites
darkmoon Posted March 16, 2015 Share Posted March 16, 2015 what happened? is he a spurned date? is he ugly and you cute? a minefield 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Andy99 Posted March 16, 2015 Author Share Posted March 16, 2015 Friends, thanks a lot! And I hope you don’t mind I call y’all Friends, never expected such an outpouring of support is all… Our outfit doesn’t use CCTV’s indoors, at least not where we’re at. I do know for a fact though that GoPro’s aren’t allowed either, recently a staffer on our floor got reprimanded for brining one in to show her racing exploits. So that’s not a realistic option for me I’m afraid. So far I’m gathering the thing for me to be doing is making sure my accounts of every unwanted encounter are recorded and dated. I’m going to keep a log from now on! Human . . . hm . . .resources told me a thing or two about how little difference it would make but I get a feeling they’d rather I not be playing with a full deck of cards. The other thing is, a few months back the coworker in question did leave me a very ambiguous voicemail. I didn’t take the care to archive it at the time, but I should have for sure. So it got deleted automatically after some time. Hindsight is always 2020. @preraph – could I have recorded the message playing back onto a voice recorder? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
darkmoon Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 he left a voicemail how did he get your number if not by you giving it to him? how? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Andy99 Posted March 21, 2015 Author Share Posted March 21, 2015 We got an open office floor plan, everyone can hear everyone else's calls. He must have overheard me when I was giving my contact details to the insurance company a couple weeks prior. Link to post Share on other sites
DrReplyInRhymes Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 (edited) Harassment is often judged by perspective, It's often noted flirting and harassment has to be dissected, Could you share some of the things they comment upon? Does it make you feel unsafe or unwanted, or perhaps low in response? It's important to note that you have to document requests, That you've asked them repeatedly to put the comments to rest, Verbally, through email, and even with witness nearby, Then document each comment afterward as he futilely tries. However, this is knowledge I will share that I've heard from someone who worked in HR, Be prepared to possibly need to find a new career or new job or a new start, Often, the official way to handle things to remove the person with whom lies the complaint, But if often results in both employees being terminated for fear of future inability to keep restraint. To a company, you are a worker bee, and if those bees go out of line, It's often best, from a grand perspective, to deal with the entire problem in kind, The problem being that 2 people didn't get along to such an extent, That they involved the company itself to have to work through the dissent. Be careful how you handle this, as it may not work out in a way that you thought, Involving your employer, especially an HR department, is not often sought. Unless you are someone of great value to the company itself, They will often replace the entire problem with an entirely new shelf. Edited March 27, 2015 by DrReplyInRhymes 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Andy99 Posted March 29, 2015 Author Share Posted March 29, 2015 (edited) Dear DrReplyInRhymes! This is AWESOME. I knew something was rotten in the HR kingdom. I'm presently testing a tool and will report my findings here. It's already making me feel more protected, the company says it can help deter litigation but it's looking like I should be splitting my attention between my annoyer and the HR. Many thanks! Edited March 29, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator removed commercial callout Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 Regarding the consent laws - do be careful about that. You can find out what the law is in your state (assuming you're in the US) by consulting your local legislature website or contacting your state attorney general. It's public information. General overview - video and audio are distinctly different forms of recording. Video is generally less restrictive, as the general attitude toward it is that you have no reasonable expectation of privacy as long as you're in the public view. (That may be mitigated by company policy, so use caution.) Audio is more restrictive because sound isn't typically limited in a 'sensible' and obvious way like sight - you can hear through walls, etc., but you can't see thru them. That said, the one or two party consent laws govern telephone conversations specifically, and whether or not you can record them with the consent of only one party (presumably the recorder - i.e., you don't have to ask) or both parties (i.e. you do have to ask for consent to record). Making audio recordings of open air audio (not on the phone) is still muddy tho in terms of expectations of privacy, so be careful about that, and again, know your company's policies as well. Good luck. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Andy99 Posted March 31, 2015 Author Share Posted March 31, 2015 Many thanks! I linked up my lawyer and he's advising me now; OnLock delivers big time 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Andy99 Posted April 14, 2015 Author Share Posted April 14, 2015 yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Andy99 Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 I have a colleague who now goes to Burger King with his supervisor to be able to prove that they were having lunch together. Anyone use this tactic? Link to post Share on other sites
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