My boss is so weak

[princeslyn]

I am working for a company as personal asistant for a british man boss.This boss is a founder of this company.I was only an ordinary staff of this company before something big I did had saved my boss 's life . I did not even talk directly to this boss nobody could touch him unless his very trusted staff who was the CEO he of this company.My boss was just like a KING or emperor and he would not talk to all staffs directly without this CEO's involvement. This CEO was like his prime minister.

Well, in fact this CEO whom he trusted so much was a big big liar and I knew all his criminal actions such as took company's money,talked bad and lie behind my boss's back and in conspiracy with some staffs planed a coup d'etat to kick out my boss.This man wanted to own this company. This CEO also asked me to join this conspiracy ,he thought I suppport him so he told me all the plans in details. This was so crazy I wanted to resign from this job but my heart say do not resign before you tell your big boss about that coup d'etat planned by the greedy CEO. In couple months I thought it over and over until I decide to talk to this bigboss. I had never talked to him before .And with the only power I had I assured my self to talk to him directly....

oh man...guess what happened he was very shocked!.And since half of the gredy CEO's plans were done .It made things were complicated and not so easy just to fire that greedy CEO. It needs a month until its done. But the consequence was my boss fire all staffs in reason he can not trust ex staffs except me.He appointed me to be his PA and gave me bigger salary but.... I had been blamed ,I had been hated by all ex staffs.Those ex staffs were very angry and even came to my house like protesters. In this full of depression situation my boss asked me directly to start whole things from zero.Can you imagine my situation? I am so stressed and depressed for I had been involved too deep. I want to leave him but I can't, feel like I pity him. The other problem is my boss changes now . He is not he used to be,an arrogant proud man. He is so weak and I think I am the one who is like his mother now. Iam oftenly angry to him even for very little thing and not important at all..every time I am angry and blame him for something he is just looked so upset and even like he has no power to explain to me. I oftenly talk rude talk to much just to make him better and he just keep silent when I start talking like that. He even asks my decision to wear which clothe suits him in some meetings. He is so weak in my eyes now he is like my son!. Even all decisions he makes he always depends on me. This brings unhealthy situation when I hate a staff personally and talk to him to fire her,my boss will do!.

I just dont understand why is he becoming so weak like this. I sometimes stay in his house couple days and I feel terrible around his family. I am not closed with his family members and I am always secluded. But I know he always starred at me and his face looked so sad to know I am secluded, he then comes to me and say pls join with us. Oftenly when his wife and his children are not in home he asked me to accompany him every where even just go to his friend house. I feel then its so weird. This is not good for me and sometimes I am worrying if he feels that he is not a boss to be respected by me. I always and will always respect him as my boss but....as my position now is his PA we are geting so closer and in all way we work together the rules are changing. I am like his mother who always talk too much, angry,complaining etc etc...he is liked my son who will say yes...yes..and yes I will do what you ask. He is so weak in my eyes and what would I do???

Edited February 1, 2014 by princeslyn

[TaraMaiden]

Find another job, and leave.

You really have very few other options, if any at all.

[theothersully]

I would not find another job. You have ultimate power. Is there a board or is he the only board member??

 

If he is the only board member, work on your business skills and get the CEO position.Start the company over again and run it, enjoying the salary and a trusting relationship with the founder.

 

If you do not want to do this, pm me and I will do it. I have founded and run several businesses and would love another entrepreneurial position like this. Not kidding at all. pm me with details if you need a replacement CEO.

[theothersully]

and the guy is probably just feeling depressed and weak because he made a big mistake.

 

I once lost a company too. We all lose one here or there. I was severely depressed for about a year. Just like your owner/founder is.

 

Again, not kidding about volunteering to rebuild this business. I am a dual US/Irish citizen, so I can live and work in either the States or the EU.

[TaraMaiden]

She can't PM you it's her first post.

I also get the impression this is in a different continent, and I doubt very much she wants the job.

She hates her situation, and realises she is working for a man who should not be in charge of a company at all...

 

Making offers of this kind is both reckless and inappropriate.

 

Read the post - the problem is personal, and not 'professional'.

 

Jeesh....

[theothersully]

She can't PM you it's her first post.

I also get the impression this is in a different continent, and I doubt very much she wants the job.

She hates her situation, and realises she is working for a man who should not be in charge of a company at all...

 

Making offers of this kind is both reckless and inappropriate.

 

Read the post - the problem is personal, and not 'professional'.

 

Jeesh....

 

Exactly, which is why he needs a powerful surrogate to do all the heavy lifting, while that surrogate makes sure his interests are attended to.

 

It's a given that owner/founder isn't operations material. That's ok. Not a problem. He needs a strong, trusted CEO to rebuild the business.

 

If she doesn't want to do that for personal reasons, I would consider doing it. That's what I was saying. However, she has a great opportunity lying at her feet.

 

"Reckless and inappropriate" is how you succeed in entrepreneurial venues. Risk vs reward. I don't play by big corporate "appropriate" rules. I take risks and win. By sitting on the sidelines and not "recklessly" making offers, you remain stuck. If you are not risking something, you are not trying hard enough and there will be no reward.

 

I wasn't joking when I said I've done this before.

Edited February 1, 2014 by theothersully

[TaraMaiden]

There is nothing in her post which seeks some kind of conclusion or rectification of her professional position.

Her entire problem lies within her personal relationship with her boss.

 

She is asking for some guidance on how to rectify the personal liaison she has been drawn into.

 

She isn't interested - and neither has she insinuated it - in engineering a strategy to control the business.

 

Address the issue put before you - don't joust at hidden dragons which don't even exist.

[Got it]

I agree with Tara.

 

I also think that the original poster has boundary issues and potentially codependency issues. Put down boundaries or leave. I am not sure why you have allowed this to bleed so far into personal time. I read a lot of passivity and passive aggressiveness in the post. Be upfront and honest with him. He respected it when you did it with his partner, do it now. Focus on the work or leave.

[Got it]

Exactly, which is why he needs a powerful surrogate to do all the heavy lifting, while that surrogate makes sure his interests are attended to.

 

It's a given that owner/founder isn't operations material. That's ok. Not a problem. He needs a strong, trusted CEO to rebuild the business.

 

If she doesn't want to do that for personal reasons, I would consider doing it. That's what I was saying. However, she has a great opportunity lying at her feet.

 

"Reckless and inappropriate" is how you succeed in entrepreneurial venues. Risk vs reward. I don't play by big corporate "appropriate" rules. I take risks and win. By sitting on the sidelines and not "recklessly" making offers, you remain stuck. If you are not risking something, you are not trying hard enough and there will be no reward.

 

I wasn't joking when I said I've done this before.

 

Doing it before and doing it based on a random post on an online forum is just odd. One can not just run any company in any industry in any country no matter how good one is as a CEO. You are also taking what little is posted here through very colored eyes and extrapolating more. If you are looking for business ventures I would stick to LinkedIn and your network as I am assuming if you have been successful in the past you have a large number of executive/entrepreneur connections.

[princeslyn]

Thank you for all your replies. I really apreciate this.

Well, my situation actually is I like this job so much as the position as my boss PA gets me closer position to my boss which means good position for ordinary staff like me. And also the salary is good more than enuff for me. But,......I never have any ambition to be CEO ,you may say I am stupid and many say so but I have no intentions nor ambitions. Iam just confused my situation now as Tara said, the rules are changing I am becoming the powerful one who drive him. There is a board member and he is not the only one but,he is the founder of this company. Even in board meeting I am always the one who talk on behalf him like his lawyer when other board member started questioning and accusing him about things had happened before. And things are always done succesfully with me beside him. I dont want tobe arogant bcuz of this..I pity him just like I said Iam afraid he thinks I dont respect him any more. I do and always respect him and many times I tried to give him my resignation letter he refused and said stay please I cant do any thing without you. Last december I gave him my 5th resignation leter he answered that he approved. What a surprise...but....a day later he wrote me by texting on cellphone please dont leave me..I need you.He even texted me personally when he read my status on a social media I said " I just want people who need me even I have nothing to offer". He texted personally said I like your status and that is me you want. This reason is a reason I can not leave him yet.. but this situation drives me confused. Are we getting so close makes me drive him like this ?? or should I keep distance from now.