Friends soon to be ex husband is hitting on me

[notaneatfreak]

i am not sure how to handle this. its a sticky situation. My friends husband is hitting on me. They are separated and it is irreconcilable. We knew this would happen. He never loved her, he just used the visa for his green card and residency status. I started working were he works and I have been friends with him for a year. My friend, his fake wife, threw him out. She proposed to him and she payed his way over here.

 

Problem is now at work I am finding myself attracted to him and he keeps constantly hitting on me. He'll tell me he is working late by himself and wants me to come join him. He'll constantly hit on me at work and my supervisor is aware of this. I work with all men. I don't know what to do because today he asked me to invite him over to my house and that he would like to see it sometime since I moved to a new place. I am just scared if he comes over something is bound to happen because I know I won't know I won't be able to keep my hands off him! I knew it was never love between the two of them but she is in such denial over it. I don't know what to do I know I am supposed to stay away but if you saw him you would understand my confusion! What do I do?

[StrongLass]

She proposed to him and she payed his way over here.

 

At this point you need to be asking yourself how much you value your friendship with your friend, since no matter how "fake" their relationship was she was obviously very invested.

 

And secondly,

 

He never loved her, he just used the visa for his green card and residency status.

 

Seriously? THAT'S what you considering dating material? If he used your friend he'll have NO problem using you. In fact at this point he probably figures you're as stupid as your friend which is why he's considering you a prime new target anyways.

 

He'll constantly hit on me at work and my supervisor is aware of this.

 

Well you aren't exactly discouraging him so I don't see why this has any relevance. Also, there are some sayings when it comes to dating people you work with (hint: don't) Imagine what working with him would be like if/when you break up (likely given what you've said about him).

 

I don't know what to do I know I am supposed to stay away but if you saw him you would understand my confusion!

 

Actually I wouldn't, because blatant users aren't sexy to me no matter what they look like.

 

Unless you want this whole thing to BLOW UP horribly in your face my advice would be to shut this guy down before you become his next doormat & find a man to date without a history of using his partners for his own selfish gains.

Edited August 27, 2013 by StrongLass

[SoleMate]

StrongLass said it all, no more discussion needed.

[Madman81]

If you allow this to go further, two things will happen:

 

1. You'll get involved with a proven user, who'll probably do the same thing to you eventually.

 

2. You'll lose your friend.

 

If you're okay with both of those, then have at him. Just don't say you weren't warned.