Have your clothes been complained about?

[Seductive]

First off, I want to clarify that I don't show up to work in low-cut blouses, stripper heels, mini-skirts or anything. My regular work clothes were a regular blouse and slacks. I had an old job where the older female co-workers were complaining about me. One co-worker told my boss that my belly button ring was showing. Um, I DON'T HAVE A BELLY BUTTON RING. My female boss told me about the complaints, and she then said, "Look, it's just that you're pretty. If you weren't pretty, your clothes wouldn't matter. Your male clients already have enough problems. Don't give them anymore. Just start shopping at a thrift store" Does anyone find this silly? Being pretty or not pretty determines what you can wear at work? What's funny is that there is no set dress code at this job. I've seen other women come in with low-cut dresses and what not, but my boss would say "Those women aren't pretty, so it's not as noticeable." As far as my male clients drooling over me, that wasn't the case at all. All of my male clients were respectful.

 

When I asked several people to give me their honest opinion on my work clothes, one friend and the man I was dating at the time suggested that the older women might be jealous. Another friend said, "Huh? I never even seen you wear tight clothes."

 

 

At my new job, nobody complains. My current job is filled with people that are in my age range, so I think their perception is different. I did talk to my current boss about the dresscode, and she said that she had no concerns about how I present myself. When she hired me, she said she felt like I had a rational head on my shoulders and trusted me to not show up in something inappropriate. If my clothes were really that bad, wouldn't my current job be complaining about it?

 

Anybody been in the situation like that? Where co-workers tried to make you feel bad about how you dressed? Is it really just office jealousy or do they have a valid point?

[mizundastud]

It does sound silly, but if atleast you have a new job and dont have to deal with it anymore. They were probably just old jealous hags.

[Seductive]

It does sound silly, but if atleast you have a new job and dont have to deal with it anymore. They were probably just old jealous hags.

 

Ha, well..I'm open to feedback. I kept quiet at that job, because I didn't want to lose my job.

[melodymatters]

I've been there ! It's difficult but you have to look at it as a compliment.

 

My MOTHER of all people gives me a hard time for this when I wear the exact same styles as her or my sister. I just have a curvy build, so a basic sweater and slacks is somehow " sexy". No, it's my curves, and while I dress appropriately, I am not going to start wearing a burka.

[pink_sugar]

I've been there ! It's difficult but you have to look at it as a compliment.

 

My MOTHER of all people gives me a hard time for this when I wear the exact same styles as her or my sister. I just have a curvy build, so a basic sweater and slacks is somehow " sexy". No, it's my curves, and while I dress appropriately, I am not going to start wearing a burka.

 

I think it holds true to some extent. If I'm showing a hint of cleavage or too much leg, my mom says I'm dressing too provocatively. Because I'm attractive, she thinks people will get the wrong idea. However, if you aren't dressing in an unprofessional way at work, I would consider this discrimination, document and report to HR.

[will1988]

I've had someone once give me hell for wearing my button down shirts unbuttoned at the top and my chest hair poking out. You know what I said? "Thats nice... but I'm showing a lot less cleavage than you!". Outside of that I never get questions...

[Star Gazer]

I consider myself above-average in attractivess with a fairly fit body. Not once during my career, even while working with older women, has anyone ever suggested I dress inappropriately.

 

Your user name kinda suggests to me that you like to demonstrate sex appeal. True?

[Seductive]

I've been there ! It's difficult but you have to look at it as a compliment.

 

My MOTHER of all people gives me a hard time for this when I wear the exact same styles as her or my sister. I just have a curvy build, so a basic sweater and slacks is somehow " sexy". No, it's my curves, and while I dress appropriately, I am not going to start wearing a burka.

 

Yeah, I've been told in curvy too. so, maybe that's it. A very skinny girl will look different than me in a sweater and slacks. Stargazer- I like looking my best, but I don't purposely try to be provocative. Most people tell me I come off as quiet and reserved. To me, seductive just means charming. It doesn't always refer to having sex appeal.

[tbf]

It hasn't happened to me either and my industry is extremely conservative.

 

If you wish, why not post a pic from the neck on downwards of yourself? This way, you can't be identified and we might possibly be able to help you with some style suggestions.

[Seductive]

It hasn't happened to me either and my industry is extremely conservative.

 

If you wish, why not post a pic from the neck on downwards of yourself? This way, you can't be identified and we might possibly be able to help you with some style suggestions.

 

Considering that nobody is complaining about me at my current job, I don't feel comfortable or necessary to post a photo of myself. If I trust my guy feeling,I don't think there is anything I need to change about my work clothes. In fact, the majority of my jobs haven't complained about me. This one particular job was the only one that complained.

[pteromom]

To me, seductive just means charming. It doesn't always refer to having sex appeal.

 

But it usually does.

 

If you are curvy and attractive, you are going to look sexier in clothing than someone who isn't as attractive. That's a fact. Sure, some women will be jealous or catty, but you never know when one of those jealous or catty women will be in a position to have a say in your career advancement.

 

Since you had complaints at your last job, you might just wanna put a little extra thought into clothing to make sure you aren't sending sexual signals at work. Because even if nobody complains or minds, if you are coming across as "seductive" at work, you will be passed over for promotions or opportunities where you represent your company to customers, etc. You don't want that to happen.

 

Just be smart about it. If you are wearing something form-fitting, don't ALSO pair it with super high heels and loose flowing hair and glossy red lips.

 

If you are wearing something with a "sexy" print like cheetah, temper it with a more conservative jacket and classic pumps.

 

Never show cleavage at work... if you have a low-cut top or dress, use a cami under it.

 

If you are showing bare arms, don't ALSO show bare legs with a short skirt.

 

You want to look pretty. You want to look together. But you want to look professional and classy.

[tbf]

Considering that nobody is complaining about me at my current job, I don't feel comfortable or necessary to post a photo of myself. If I trust my guy feeling,I don't think there is anything I need to change about my work clothes. In fact, the majority of my jobs haven't complained about me. This one particular job was the only one that complained.

That's fine but consider future jobs. Not all offices are created equal in their dress code and if there are some style tips we can provide, it can only help for the future.

 

Unfortunately, clothing, demeanor and comportment matter, when it comes to the business world. People are judged not only for their work, they're judged for their ability to present a positive image of their company, however subtle the difference from one firm to the next. If employees are good producers with the right look and attitude, these are going to be the ones who are promoted.

[Seductive]

But it usually does.

 

If you are curvy and attractive, you are going to look sexier in clothing than someone who isn't as attractive. That's a fact. Sure, some women will be jealous or catty, but you never know when one of those jealous or catty women will be in a position to have a say in your career advancement.

 

Since you had complaints at your last job, you might just wanna put a little extra thought into clothing to make sure you aren't sending sexual signals at work. Because even if nobody complains or minds, if you are coming across as "seductive" at work, you will be passed over for promotions or opportunities where you represent your company to customers, etc. You don't want that to happen.

 

Just be smart about it. If you are wearing something form-fitting, don't ALSO pair it with super high heels and loose flowing hair and glossy red lips.

 

If you are wearing something with a "sexy" print like cheetah, temper it with a more conservative jacket and classic pumps.

 

Never show cleavage at work... if you have a low-cut top or dress, use a cami under it.

 

If you are showing bare arms, don't ALSO show bare legs with a short skirt.

 

You want to look pretty. You want to look together. But you want to look professional and classy.

 

I'm already a supervisor at my current job, which is advanced position. What's interesting is that I'm making more money than the same women that complained about me. If I was giving off a bad impression, why would a company hire me as a supervisor to manage other people and run a program? And sorry, I don't show off my cleavage or wear cheetah prints at work. My boss also told me that clients and companies are pleased with my performance. If there were complaints about me or if people thought I was sending sexUalized signals, she said she would let me know. I've been at my current job for 6 months. I'm sure someone would have said something by now.

[pteromom]

I'm already a supervisor at my current job, which is advanced position. What's interesting is that I'm making more money than the same women that complained about me. If I was giving off a bad impression, why would a company hire me as a supervisor to manage other people and run a program? And sorry, I don't show off my cleavage or wear cheetah prints at work. My boss also told me that clients and companies are pleased with my performance. If there were complaints about me or if people thought I was sending sexUalized signals, she said she would let me know. I've been at my current job for 6 months. I'm sure someone would have said something by now.

 

Then it sounds to me like it was just them being jealous. If there's no issue, then no worries.

[Seductive]

That's fine but consider future jobs. Not all offices are created equal in their dress code and if there are some style tips we can provide, it can only help for the future.

 

Unfortunately, clothing, demeanor and comportment matter, when it comes to the business world. People are judged not only for their work, they're judged for their ability to present a positive image of their company, however subtle the difference from one firm to the next. If employees are good producers with the right look and attitude, these are going to be the ones who are promoted.

 

See my above post on how I already got promoted to a supervisor at a better agency. Can you explain why I got a supervisor position, instead of those women that were complaining?

[Seductive]

But it usually does.

 

Seductive means sex to those that think black and white. Have you read the art of seduction? The book isn't anything about how to look sexy or get someone to have sex with you. It talks about charm, power, success and magnetizing people. The historic figures mentioned in the book that were seen as "seductive" weren't even physically attractive or dressed provocatively.

 

I have to disagree that the word seductive always must have a sexual implication to it. If other people see it that way, that's their perception. If you're a deep thinker, you can find ambiguity and a broader perspective with the word.

[pteromom]

Seductive means sex to those that think black and white, and don't think ambiguously. Have you read the art of seduction? The book isn't anything about how to look sexy or get someone to have sex with you. It talks about charm, power, success and magnetizing people. The historic figures mentioned in the book that were seen as "seductive" weren't even physically attractive or dressed provocatively.

 

Sorry, but I have to disagree that the word seductive always must have a sexual implication to it. If other people see it that way, that's their perception.

 

OK. When I hear "seductive", what comes to my mind is someone trying to seduce another person sexually. And I am about the most UN-black and white thinker ever.

 

If you mean it differently, great. No judgment from me either way.

[Seductive]

OK. When I hear "seductive", what comes to my mind is someone trying to seduce another person sexually. And I am about the most UN-black and white thinker ever.

 

If you mean it differently, great. No judgment from me either way.

 

I think people can seduce others in non-sexual ways.

[pteromom]

I think people can seduce others in non-sexual ways.

 

Sure. I agree. It's just not the first meaning of the word that pops into my head.

[Feelin Frisky]

Office life can suck if you wind up with crappy people around you. Just one can make things miserable. Jobs are often available because other people have fled the toxic energy of certain co-workers. That's always a thing to consider when taking a job i.e. why is it open in the first place. I had a woman say one of the cruelest things ever to me. She looked like an E-wok from Star Wars no less. If I had it to do over I would have reported her for sexual harassment. For no reason that I could ascertain she came over to me and said "so when are you getting married?" followed by "oh never mind, who would marry a creep like you?" Wtf? She kept staring daggers at me and grunting all the time and had sunflower seed shells sticking out of her lip. I got to truly truly hate that woman. And the weird thing is that she worked for another firm and I had to call her almost daily before she got a job with us and everything was cordial and sometimes jovial. Then that, when I was really working hard and not meeting anyone. Man. Who the hell needs that?

[todreaminblue]

I think people can seduce others in non-sexual ways.

 

 

se·duce [si-doos, -dyoos] Show IPA

verb (used with object), se·duced, se·duc·ing.

1.

to lead astray, as from duty, rectitude, or the like; corrupt.

2.

to persuade or induce to have sexual intercourse.

3.

to lead or draw away, as from principles, faith, or allegiance: He was seduced by the prospect of gain.

4.

to win over; attract; entice: a supermarket seducing customers with special sales.

 

.........seduction is almost always to entice another........or attract.......whether it is sexual or not....it is a lead on.......

[Seductive]

se·duce [si-doos, -dyoos] Show IPA

verb (used with object), se·duced, se·duc·ing.

1.

to lead astray, as from duty, rectitude, or the like; corrupt.

2.

to persuade or induce to have sexual intercourse.

3.

to lead or draw away, as from principles, faith, or allegiance: He was seduced by the prospect of gain.

4.

to win over; attract; entice: a supermarket seducing customers with special sales.

 

.........seduction is almost always to entice another........or attract.......whether it is sexual or not....it is a lead on.......

 

 

I prefer this explanation:

 

 

"Seduction" isn't just about sex - and maybe not at all. May 8, 2006

By Billy D Squires BillyDSquires

 

If you're getting this book as a way to manipulate strangers to go to bed with you, you don't need this book. You need something else.

 

On the other hand once you realize and accept the broader meaning of "seduction," which is to lead, guide, direct, influence another individual or individuals to willingly go along with your wishes, whether benevolent or not, this is your book.

 

For my part, I actually recognized the techniques people who manipluated me for years in the music business. People who seemed to work magic on me and my companions to get us to do things and perform for less than we should have and be glad to accept a gig that none of us wanted, etc etc. How'd they DO that? Now I know.

 

How does a national leader seduce his country into going to war? How does a cult leader seduce his or her followers into giving up good jobs, careers and wonderful familes in order to live under the rule of a boundless ego? How can a corporation be seduced? A community? A church? How can YOU be seduced? It's all laid bare in this book.

 

The Concise Art of Seduction is a Readers Digest of the full volume, which I also have. This one is a quicker read, which means you can began putting up your defenses NOW against that boss, manager, spouse(!) or whomever, and start seeing through the emperor's clothes of manipulation and seduction. You'll seem to have wisdom beyond your years, and will be able to protect yourself from the kind of victimization that takes in millions of otherwise intelligent but hapless people each day in our society. That's all I have to say about that."

 

The Art of Seduction: Robert Greene: 9781861977694: Amazon.com: Books