Difficult Office Manager

[venusianx13]

I've been working my government job for about 4 years (another govt. position for 3 years before this one). I answer directly to the office manager, which has been a nightmare, to say the least. I've done my best to suck it up, though I have mentioned to "the big boss" on two occasions that I was having some difficulty in pleasing the Office Manager (OM from here on in).

 

The position I started with was different from the one I have now, as two years in I took over the position of a woman who retired. I learned the duties quickly and was eager for the responsibility, as I felt it was a good stepping stone for me. (that has turned out to be far from the truth, but that's another story). So, in a nutshell, I took on twice the responsibility I had before, yet it never ended up a in a raise or promotion. That's government for you, I guess.

 

So, my OM is a very difficult person. Early 40's, bitter, divorced, hates children (has none). I have gone above and beyond my duties in that I have taken on projects with different programs being run within the office in order to help save the office some money on print jobs and such, because I have some know-how when it comes to graphics. I created logos and letterhead for a new program called "Put it Down" to deter drivers from using their cell phones whilst driving. Not a day passes where I don't see one of these bumper stickers or magnets on the road. However, my OM never mentioned this in my employee review. She is, instead, hyper-critical of minor mistakes I make, and seems to have nothing positive to say. I want to bring this up in my next employee review, but I've always had a hard time being an advocate for myself, so I'm at a loss as to how to do this. As I mentioned, I talked to the big boss twice, and my words seemed to fall on deaf ears.

 

I've dealt with this woman's negativity for 4 years now. I feel like nothing I do is pleasing to her and I feel nearly defeated. Aside from this, she sends a loud and clear message to the rest of the staff in my realm that she is "above" us. I clearly understand that she holds a position of management, but she is literally so very inconsiderate in the way that she operates that it's belittling to the rest of us. For instance, she will need to run a work errand, herself, and will walk down the block and pass the post-office, which is a duty (mail-collection) that the rest of us take turns with back in admin. She will simply pass it by, and not offer to get the office mail. However, if one of us goes to retrieve the office mail, she will actually ask us to collect her personal mail from her PO box while we are there. This is the kind of OM I report to, and it's wearing on me.

 

I have been on the look-out for other jobs... but in the meantime, what can I do to better advocate for myself here?

[Ladybugz]

yeah i never heard that its great fun working for the goverment.

only thing i hear is its nice for your work history and that it pays well/

 

maybe you should take some backbone classes so you can have backbone at any job where you work.

 

and if you do all of that maybe they should pay you much more.

 

you dont have to say yes to everything.

often people see what they can do to who.

 

and i see that its something that happen to the group you work with

so its not all about something she do to only you???!

 

if it take the fun frm your work , you may need to adress it or find a way to deal with it.

you can use the "kill her with kindness" way or stands for your right kind of way.

 

reacting emotional often ask to much of you at work.

so maybe you should deal with her only proffesionaly.

 

and f -it goverment have enough money of us. you dont have to help them save no money. they have it let them spent it!

 

i dont know what kind of person she is. but sometimes its just a enviorment that

is always there. so you role with it or you get out kind of thing.

sometimes when you speak up it can get worse.

 

so you need to see what can work in this situation.

[Ladybugz]

i hope she is not a member of this website. ahahahahha and reading this.lol

[tbf]

Consider it from a different perspective. You envision your job and worth from perspective A. Your manager envisions your job and worth from perspective B. Until you can transfer out, I'd attempt to shift your perspective to B, since she sounds like an annoying, nitpicky bitch who enjoys lording it over her staff.

[venusianx13]

i hope she is not a member of this website. ahahahahha and reading this.lol

Ladybugz, I think I'd be okay with that, haha...

 

I want to make a good impression at my job, and I am, by nature, very helpful. I wasn't expecting an award or anything for what I did in regards to that program, but to leave it out of my review? That was disconcerting, to say the least...

 

About her personality, and how I deal with it; I've tried being kind to her. I bought her some of her favorite candies on her birthday, when no one got her a cake, and have offered to help with things other people haven't... and I wasn't doing it to earn points, I was doing it because I genuinely felt sorry for her. It just seems I can't win with her, and I don't try to anymore. I pretty much seclude myself to my office in the back, and seldom venture out so as to avoid her.

 

Another co-worker of mine told me I walk a very fine line, because I answer directly to the OM. She understands where I would not want to stir the pot, but she also sees where the OM definitely crosses many lines with her behavior. And another thing that makes me wary is the fact that OM is privy to employees' private info, and she gossips - all the time. I have a big problem with this. I used to do a lot of transcription at my job, so I'd turn up the volume and just type for hours so as to drown her out, but since my duties have changed, I don't do as much of that so it's not as easy to ignore. I try my best, though. *shrug*

[TheFinalWord]

I've been working my government job for about 4 years (another govt. position for 3 years before this one). I answer directly to the office manager, which has been a nightmare, to say the least. I've done my best to suck it up, though I have mentioned to "the big boss" on two occasions that I was having some difficulty in pleasing the Office Manager (OM from here on in).

 

The position I started with was different from the one I have now, as two years in I took over the position of a woman who retired. I learned the duties quickly and was eager for the responsibility, as I felt it was a good stepping stone for me. (that has turned out to be far from the truth, but that's another story). So, in a nutshell, I took on twice the responsibility I had before, yet it never ended up a in a raise or promotion. That's government for you, I guess.

 

So, my OM is a very difficult person. Early 40's, bitter, divorced, hates children (has none). I have gone above and beyond my duties in that I have taken on projects with different programs being run within the office in order to help save the office some money on print jobs and such, because I have some know-how when it comes to graphics. I created logos and letterhead for a new program called "Put it Down" to deter drivers from using their cell phones whilst driving. Not a day passes where I don't see one of these bumper stickers or magnets on the road. However, my OM never mentioned this in my employee review. She is, instead, hyper-critical of minor mistakes I make, and seems to have nothing positive to say. I want to bring this up in my next employee review, but I've always had a hard time being an advocate for myself, so I'm at a loss as to how to do this. As I mentioned, I talked to the big boss twice, and my words seemed to fall on deaf ears.

 

I've dealt with this woman's negativity for 4 years now. I feel like nothing I do is pleasing to her and I feel nearly defeated. Aside from this, she sends a loud and clear message to the rest of the staff in my realm that she is "above" us. I clearly understand that she holds a position of management, but she is literally so very inconsiderate in the way that she operates that it's belittling to the rest of us. For instance, she will need to run a work errand, herself, and will walk down the block and pass the post-office, which is a duty (mail-collection) that the rest of us take turns with back in admin. She will simply pass it by, and not offer to get the office mail. However, if one of us goes to retrieve the office mail, she will actually ask us to collect her personal mail from her PO box while we are there. This is the kind of OM I report to, and it's wearing on me.

 

I have been on the look-out for other jobs... but in the meantime, what can I do to better advocate for myself here?

 

The first recommendation I would have (and this is for anyone in a professional job) is to create a portfolio of your work. Never wait for a formal review; review yourself and let the evidence speak for itself

 

Not saying this next part to brag, but to possibly give you some ideas...

 

My first job out of college, I did customer service. I maintained a log of all phone calls (no one asked me to), department requests, and tasks I completed. I asked customers to e-mail me their comments of appreciation and I would print and keep the e-mails in a binder. Any project I did, I kept and recorded (I'm also a bit of a math geek so I would break down cost savings; you can do that too by showing dissemination of your marketing materials). I also developed quarterly goals on my own, with clear objectives. Often, government jobs will have training classes you can take. I would recommend anything that you can do to demonstrate professional development, sign up and take it. Another thing, which a lot of managers like, is when you ask for their help. I told my boss, I would like to do such and such a career and how can I get there. Let them know you see them as a door to success, often this can make them feel empowered.

 

When I went into my review, I laid everything out for my bosses. They were not expecting it and there was nothing to complain about because I had tangible evidence. You can also ask to have your self-evaluations and work reports kept in your file. This way, if you apply for another job, another manager can see your work and your growth cannot be impeded by a negative manager.

 

I myself have dealt with difficult managers. One thing I would try to do is to try to find any positive traits they have and focus on those. Also, if your goal is to get promoted, you will need an exit strategy. Start networking with other departments and build your portfolio. With networking, find a career path you would like and seek a mentor. Goals + a solid mentor = unlimited success

 

"Plans go wrong for lack of advice; many advisers bring success."

 

Next bit is spiritual. I know you are Buddhist, so take what you want. With my last bad boss, I prayed about it. I forgave my mean boss, and told God that I would not let anyone steal my joy. God gave me a new vision for my life. Literally, from that moment no man could hold me back. When they tried to discourage, I would just laugh to myself b/c no man can fight God. If God is for you, no one can be against you.

 

Currently, there is a boss that is extremely jealous of me and has tried to undercut me at any pass. However, God has protected me and his plans backfired. So, my advice is do the tangible things, but also pray for guidance.

Those who trust in the Lord are like Mount Zion, which cannot be shaken but endures forever. As the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds his people both now and forevermore.

Edited January 28, 2013 by TheFinalWord

[venusianx13]

The first recommendation I would have (and this is for anyone in a professional job) is to create a portfolio of your work. Never wait for a formal review; review yourself and let the evidence speak for itself

 

Not saying this next part to brag, but to possibly give you some ideas...

 

My first job out of college, I did customer service. I maintained a log of all phone calls (no one asked me to), department requests, and tasks I completed. I asked customers to e-mail me their comments of appreciation and I would print and keep the e-mails in a binder. Any project I did, I kept and recorded (I'm also a bit of a math geek so I would break down cost savings; you can do that too by showing dissemination of your marketing materials). I also developed quarterly goals on my own, with clear objectives. Often, government jobs will have training classes you can take. I would recommend anything that you can do to demonstrate professional development, sign up and take it. Another thing, which a lot of managers like, is when you ask for their help. I told my boss, I would like to do such and such a career and how can I get there. Let them know you see them as a door to success, often this can make them feel empowered.

 

When I went into my review, I laid everything out for my bosses. They were not expecting it and there was nothing to complain about because I had tangible evidence. You can also ask to have your self-evaluations and work reports kept in your file. This way, if you apply for another job, another manager can see your work and your growth cannot be impeded by a negative manager.

 

I myself have dealt with difficult managers. One thing I would try to do is to try to find any positive traits they have and focus on those. Also, if your goal is to get promoted, you will need an exit strategy. Start networking with other departments and build your portfolio. With networking, find a career path you would like and seek a mentor. Goals + a solid mentor = unlimited success

 

"Plans go wrong for lack of advice; many advisers bring success."

 

Next bit is spiritual. I know you are Buddhist, so take what you want. With my last bad boss, I prayed about it. I forgave my mean boss, and told God that I would not let anyone steal my joy. God gave me a new vision for my life. Literally, from that moment no man could hold me back. When they tried to discourage, I would just laugh to myself b/c no man can fight God. If God is for you, no one can be against you.

 

Currently, there is a boss that is extremely jealous of me and has tried to undercut me at any pass. However, God has protected me and his plans backfired. So, my advice is do the tangible things, but also pray for guidance.

Those who trust in the Lord are like Mount Zion, which cannot be shaken but endures forever. As the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds his people both now and forevermore.

 

 

That is fantastic advice, thank you so much... I have kept my work, but haven't organized a portfolio yet. I will definitely do that. Very practical.

 

As for the praying - yes, I do that. Not so much as of late, but I've never forgotten its value. The times when I'd felt the strongest were when I had the most love in my heart. I believe firmly that love protects. I should and will stop thinking so negatively of her, despite how she behaves towards me (and others), and recall all that I've learned. Yes, I am a Buddhist, but I'm with you...prayer and faith do help, absolutely. Thank you for reminding me of that.

[TheFinalWord]

That is fantastic advice, thank you so much... I have kept my work, but haven't organized a portfolio yet. I will definitely do that. Very practical.

 

As for the praying - yes, I do that. Not so much as of late, but I've never forgotten its value. The times when I'd felt the strongest were when I had the most love in my heart. I believe firmly that love protects. I should and will stop thinking so negatively of her, despite how she behaves towards me (and others), and recall all that I've learned. Yes, I am a Buddhist, but I'm with you...prayer and faith do help, absolutely. Thank you for reminding me of that.

 

You're welcome. A lot of people are making e-folios now. With your marketing, you can probably put something together really cool to demonstrate your skills. A lot of folks these days have their 1-2 page resume with a web site to their portfolio with all of their work artifacts. I know portfolios and resumes made with InDesign are popular for marketing/PR fields.

 

 

I will pray for you too. You seem like such a nice woman and good worker. I'm sorry you have to go through this. Four years is a long time, you have a lot of patience!!!

[Ladybugz]

@Thefinal....

 

Thats great advice praying for the person and for Jesus to

give you the wisdom to deal with them

 

And i forgot about that one 2.

See the good things in her and give her compliments on it.

Not like a fool but once in a while.

 

Study how she is , what she like and give compliments on that etc.

not in a slimy way, but just you know let it sound naturaly.

This is kind of what i meant with " kill her with kindness".

She wants to do you wrong do her right.

At the end she may start having bad nights 2 for being like that towards you.

 

And where you see that you have to say somethng, say it.

Cause i dont believe in walking like a zombie take crap and once you dont work there

you feel like , why did i not say notting i feel this and that i should have say this and that at that point.

And remember you are a human. even thou the goverment espects a lot from you

they fail 110000000000000 times to towards us.

So you cant be perfect all the time,\

Just cause your boss is going t say something. you can only do your best.

 

Sometimes where its posible let it seem like its also good for her if you do it that way.

[Ladybugz]

you can also read books about dealing with difficult people and bosses.

[pink_sugar]

For the most part, I really enjoy my job and my manager is nice. I work from home. However, my boss tends to micromanage....sends emails all hours of the day and seems to expect things to be done the moment she sends the emails. She knows I have a primary day job and I go to school online. I virtually am working around the clock and the assignments she gives me can be a lot more time consuming than she thinks. She accused me of my work being sloppy and that it only must have taken me 10 minutes rather than the hour it actually took me. She can be picky and I do my best to improve because I need the money. She put me on a salary and sometimes with the amount of work I am given and the amount of time it takes, I feel I should get paid more. I'm not expecting to be paid more, but is there a way to get her off of my back about contacting me a few times a day to make sure things are done. I understand the importance, but I do have other obligations and I want to find a way to communicate to her that I will get the assignments done by the end of the week and that a lot of it is more time consuming than we both thought.

[venusianx13]

For the most part, I really enjoy my job and my manager is nice. I work from home. However, my boss tends to micromanage....sends emails all hours of the day and seems to expect things to be done the moment she sends the emails. She knows I have a primary day job and I go to school online. I virtually am working around the clock and the assignments she gives me can be a lot more time consuming than she thinks. She accused me of my work being sloppy and that it only must have taken me 10 minutes rather than the hour it actually took me. She can be picky and I do my best to improve because I need the money. She put me on a salary and sometimes with the amount of work I am given and the amount of time it takes, I feel I should get paid more. I'm not expecting to be paid more, but is there a way to get her off of my back about contacting me a few times a day to make sure things are done. I understand the importance, but I do have other obligations and I want to find a way to communicate to her that I will get the assignments done by the end of the week and that a lot of it is more time consuming than we both thought.

 

 

Is there any way you can speak with your manager about this, since you seem to get along well with her? I'd go that route, if I were able.

 

I don't believe that supervisors truly understand how hindering their micro-managing can be, and that's because they aren't actually performing the tasks. Something that happens to me in my position is that certain time-sensitive tasks get offset by my OM's micro-management. It's frustrating, I agree. But until they truly understand what a task entails, they'll operate on their ignorance.