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Looking to talk about it


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somethingclever

Hey guys,

 

I've cheated (when I was younger) and have been cheated on. I have 2 other friends in the same position and we want to take a closer look at the underlying issues and try and learn something from them.

 

We're thinking about doing a documentary based on infidelity so we can look into both sides of the affair. The one side having the affair and the other who has no idea about it. Whats the blame...why do we do it..where do we go from here..

 

My temptations have slowed as I've gotten older but they're still there. This mind of mine that thinks sometimes of taking risks and putting everything I love on the line is scary to me. I want to talk about it.

 

Any thoughts?

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UpwardForward

The topic you wish to discusss may fit better in the Infidelity Forum.

 

But I'll take a shot at it anyway.

 

When it comes to anykind of cheating, I was raised well by my father. But the deal wasn't sealed until I came to God.

 

Adopting the white and black - good vs evil theory takes much of the confusion out of which path to follow. Not to say I'm not a sinner, because I am. But I know which direction I'm supposed to follow.

 

This simplifies things.

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  • 3 weeks later...

I'll tell you the reason why I cheated in my younger days... like 5 years ago lol... well I dated this guy, but I wanted to break up with him he wouldn't let me so I asked him if I cheated on him will he leave me then, he said yes, so I cheated, still he didn't leave me... I tried breaking up with him, but he would cry his eyes out... and beg, *sigh* anyways...

 

that's one... another reason for me to cheat in the past was, I wasn't given the attention and affection I needed. My bf at the time would be gone from 7 in the morning to 10 at night taking my car, I had nothing. Yes he cheated on me too, but the point is, I believe people cheat when they feel like they aren't giving the affection they want...

 

Sex everyday? Sometimes when they aren't getting that affection, they have to have it from someone else...

 

sometimes cheating gives the cheater the rush feeling like "I'm so slick, I'm BA(bad a$$), it's mischievous, etc"

 

Cheaters like the attention, they think they are players, or pimps more like it... but in the end they hurt others feelings.

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Well. I have made the (as Upwards above says) "Black and White" decision to remain loyal. I have told myself that if I am with someone, and find myself wanting to be with someone different, it is time to re-evaluate my current relationship. In my eyes, cheating is just too damn messy. I'd rather cleanup my first mess before I make another.

 

Those of us that remain loyal still have attraction for others... and we can damn well sense it when someone new wants us. That is the animal part of us. It's only natural. ACTING on it is what seperates us from the weaker indulgent waywards of the world.

Edited by GLDheart
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