Shoot the messenger?

[Tayla]

As the saying goes, don't shoot the messenger, and on the opposing side is

"Consider the source"-

Which leads to the following:

A Co worker that lives in her own delusional world took it upon herself to send an email to the general staff involving an "update" on another co workers personal family challenge.

First: The Coworker who is having this family challenge absolutely distains this fellow co worker.

Secondly: ITs his own personal family matter not to be aired at work.

Third: He is a private fellow and really only shares with those he trust. He doesn't want the company involved in his family matter. Which I can totally respect.

Come Monday, all the banter at work will be about this matter and how to squech the reprocussions. He will be absolutely LIVID that this co worker wrote this email and spewed his personal life. I for one do not want to be there as he can be cut throat when someone intrudes on his personal life.

To clairfy in a respectful way it was a Medical family matter that had NO place to be recited without the patients knowledge. Maybe I am old fashion and don't bring my family stuff to work, but I really have considered the source and this co worker deserves to be shot

So to you LS' folks, would you have put your neck on the line to be the company gossiper about a co workers family matter?

[betterdeal]

If you can't shoot, don't messange.

[spice4life]

That just sounds weird. Why would anyone feel they have right to update an entire company about someone's personal business? And the answer is no, if I understand the question properly, I would never take it upon myself to gossip about someone's private family medical issue.

[Tayla]

Thanks Spice. Been in a muddle on this as I do get it that some folks who think they are trying to be helpful may not realize they were intrusive by other folks perspective. I am most likely going to forward this email over to the HR department as I think it infringes on this employee's rights to private information. It really wasn't this co workers place to step in and make such an announcement. It was at the other CO workers discretion to share or not to share.

[betterdeal]

Don't the HR dept have this email already?

[laRubiaBonita]

it is totally inappropriate for the messenger to send that email.

 

AND don't shoot the messenger implies that a message was delivered by a sender via a messenger....... not that the 'messenger' is spreading personal matters- that is just a gossip. and it is OK to shoot a gossip- Especially on Full Moon Mondays!

[Minnie09]

So what's the question exactly?

No-it's definitely not appropriate to share private medical details of some other staff member's family member, especially not by e-mail and addressed to everybody in the company.

But why would you get involved and talk to HR? Isn't that the person in question's very own business? That's almost the same as spreading personal info. How do you know your co-worker is ok with that?

[laRubiaBonita]

But why would you get involved and talk to HR? Isn't that the person in question's very own business? That's almost the same as spreading personal info. How do you know your co-worker is ok with that?

 

i am in agreement with this.

 

if i were in HR i would tell Family Challenge Man not to tell of his personal life at work, because not everyone shares the same discretion in keeping things private.

[Tayla]

Thanks for the varying responses! This is important as it adds to how things actually were resolved.

Firstly, no HR was not listed on the Group email list as it was for a particular department that included our one owner. He is on vacation so its doubtful he'll even read it til he returns.

As to my involvement, Gosh I am surprised at some folks response. When an indecency is done via an employers group email, does one just remain silent and bury their heads? I would hope as adults we have some accountability to address the matter. ITs company policy to address things of this nature for HR to handle otherwise how can they resolve and direct the matter to the sender?

The Co worker whos family member has the medical concern was "NOT" listed in the group email. HE is a private person and only shares some matters with those he trust. No one is a robot in our work environment, we do have human concerns and empathy for some staff. We just know how to be discreet and mindful.

To give an update- Yes the email was forwarded to HR by myself and a few other staff members that received the email.

The cookie cutter response of 'Thank you for bringing this to our attention, we shall address it with the sender'. The employee was called to HR, what happened is anyones guess. The staff is generally supportive of each other and I think this was a matter that needed to be handled directly and swiftly.

[betterdeal]

Good call. As well as intruding on his privacy, the sender intruded on your space within the organisation and, as such, that merits a complaint, and you followed policy, to your advantage.

[laRubiaBonita]

The Co worker whos family member has the medical concern was "NOT" listed in the group email. HE is a private person and only shares some matters with those he trust. No one is a robot in our work environment, we do have human concerns and empathy for some staff. We just know how to be discreet and mindful.

To give an update- Yes the email was forwarded to HR by myself and a few other staff members that received the email.

The cookie cutter response of 'Thank you for bringing this to our attention, we shall address it with the sender'. The employee was called to HR, what happened is anyones guess. The staff is generally supportive of each other and I think this was a matter that needed to be handled directly and swiftly.

 

i am glad it was resolved in the way you would have expected your work environment to do so.

makes me wonder about mine- they would tell me to MYOB, but sugary.

 

i am sure you will find out what happened to the sender of the email soon!

[Minnie09]

I wonder to whose advantage that was.

By involving a third party and forwarding the private information to even more people, without asking for the co-worker's permission in advance, the indiscretion has been made worse. Why not ask him if it's ok for him to involve HR, and then make the move? Sometimes it's more important to use common sense than be politically correct, IMO. This case shows it. The person in question who values his/her privacy more than anything was totally ignored. Not a good decision. That's no different than sending the e-mail out in the first place.