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Pregnant employee and standards


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I'm irritated with a situation at work. I work with a woman who is about 7 months pregnant. As she has gotten further in to her pregnancy she has completely stopped respecting our dress code (which is business casual, and on the relaxed end of that for most employees). She now comes in to work wearing disgusting sweat pants, polos and tennis shoes. She looks like a pile of slop.

 

In addition, her performance is bad. She doesn't get work done and she is lazy. This has always been true for this employee but it has gotten worse since she has been pregnant.

 

She complains a lot saying that she's uncomfortable, tired and can't concentrate because she is an older pregnant woman (she's 41).

 

Somehow I seem to be the only one that finds this unacceptable. Everyone is like "aww but she's pregnant" like pregnancy excuses you from any sort of responsibility. There is another pregnant woman at work right now who isn't like this at all, and there have been several in the past who continued functioning like proper employees.

 

I have the authority to tell her to dress better, and her direct supervisor has talked to her briefly about her productivity. But I'm not sure if I should say anything. Am I being insensitive? Should I just let it go and let her dress like a slob? Is pregnancy a good excuse for this?

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threebyfate

If she's a relatively low paid office worker, can she afford to buy a new wardrobe that only lasts for another couple of months?

 

As for her performance, expect that pregnant women will lose some of their focus and effectiveness. It's commonly called baby brain.

 

But you can't terminate her right now unless you want to open up the company to civil suit. As well, staff perception about the humanity of HR and management could be greatly impacted.

 

Document everything, get her agreement of non-performance in writing and move her to a position that doesn't require as much effort.

 

When she comes back from maternity leave, if she comes back that is, and her dress and performance don't improve, get rid of her.

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Thanks TBF. So I should let the clothing slide for now, yes? She is a lower wage office worker, makes just under 50k. But I feel like that is enough to buy something decent at Target or somewhere inexpensive.

 

I can't get rid of her at all. She has been with the company for a long time and while she can be lazy she has broad knowledge of her department. Training someone on everything she knows how to do just isn't cost effective. I just hate the sloppiness.

 

I don't want to be overly harsh on something that doesn't matter at the end of the day. Also, I know that I don't understand pregnancy since I have never been pregnant, so I don't want to be the a-hole that lacks empathy.

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threebyfate

As long as her clothing is clean and doesn't have holes or is thread-bare, I would let that slide. I've had plenty of employees pregnant and have relaxed dress code, as long as they're not seen or interact with clients or the public.

 

But you have to train someone on her job, since she's going on mat leave. If it means that 10 people take on a bit more, she's replaceable. Get her to start training people sooner, rather than later since she might start her mat leave earlier than expected. Shyte happens when pregnant. Learned that first-hand. :p

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Thanks TBF. So I should let the clothing slide for now, yes? She is a lower wage office worker, makes just under 50k. But I feel like that is enough to buy something decent at Target or somewhere inexpensive.

 

 

What industry/company are you with? What city is this that pays its lower wage office worker $50K?

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Pregnancy is no excuse to ignore the dress code at work. It's no excuse to perform below par either. If it were me, I'd talk to her. I'm no feminist but didn't we women work hard to establish equality in the workforce? Why should we be given a free pass?

 

Trust me, when I was pregnant and working I would have killed to wear comfy clothes. I didn't though. I agreed to a certain standard when I was hired and I respected that whether I was pregnant or not. At the point where my energy level became too low to deliver quality work, I gave notice and left.

 

That's how I feel, that it shouldn't be an excuse. I don't understand why a woman should be excused from any sort of standards or responsibility because she is pregnant.

 

And she doesn't have to wear a suit or any restrictive clothing. A maternity pair of slacks and a blouse or sweater would be fine, just not nasty sweats!

 

What industry/company are you with? What city is this that pays its lower wage office worker $50K?

 

I didn't mean that she was low income. I meant that she wasn't a VP, in management or any high level position. This is in SF where the cost of living is significantly higher than in most other places in the US.

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pureinheart
I'm irritated with a situation at work. I work with a woman who is about 7 months pregnant. As she has gotten further in to her pregnancy she has completely stopped respecting our dress code (which is business casual, and on the relaxed end of that for most employees). She now comes in to work wearing disgusting sweat pants, polos and tennis shoes. She looks like a pile of slop.

 

In addition, her performance is bad. She doesn't get work done and she is lazy. This has always been true for this employee but it has gotten worse since she has been pregnant.

 

She complains a lot saying that she's uncomfortable, tired and can't concentrate because she is an older pregnant woman (she's 41).

 

Somehow I seem to be the only one that finds this unacceptable. Everyone is like "aww but she's pregnant" like pregnancy excuses you from any sort of responsibility. There is another pregnant woman at work right now who isn't like this at all, and there have been several in the past who continued functioning like proper employees.

 

I have the authority to tell her to dress better, and her direct supervisor has talked to her briefly about her productivity. But I'm not sure if I should say anything. Am I being insensitive? Should I just let it go and let her dress like a slob? Is pregnancy a good excuse for this?

 

Is there any standard concerning how others are referred to by lower level management?

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Is there any standard concerning how others are referred to by lower level management?

 

I treat everyone at work with a lot of respect. The employee in question has had issues with management due to her poor work ethic, now she is completely violating company policy regarding dress code. Despite all this I'm still trying to be understanding, so I'm not sure what your problem is. I am free to vent my frustrations and ask for advice here.

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GorillaTheater

I guarantee you that if you terminate her for a dress code issue, the jury you face in a year or two will eat you alive.

 

If you feel that you absolutely have to do something, go the progressive discipline route. Sit down with you and talk with her about it, but don't do anything beyond that for now and see what happens when she comes back from maternity leave.

 

You are giving her maternity leave, right?

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I completely agree with you, Allina. How we dress very often is a reflection of our work ethic.

 

And if you let her come to work like that, you're setting yourself up for others to do the same in the future perhaps.

 

And here is the thing. If this employee came to me and said "I'm having a difficult pregnancy and it's very uncomfortable for me to wear trousers (or whatever), I would have been super cool about it and worked with her. Instead, she starts showing up in old, gray sweats and slacks off!

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I guarantee you that if you terminate her for a dress code issue, the jury you face in a year or two will eat you alive.

 

If you feel that you absolutely have to do something, go the progressive discipline route. Sit down with you and talk with her about it, but don't do anything beyond that for now and see what happens when she comes back from maternity leave.

 

You are giving her maternity leave, right?

 

Termination is NOT on the table. I was just questioning if it was insensitive for me, someone who does not understand pregnancy to call her in for a meeting about this.

 

Yes, she is getting maternity leave.

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GorillaTheater
Termination is NOT on the table. I was just questioning if it was insensitive for me, someone who does not understand pregnancy to call her in for a meeting about this.

 

Yes, she is getting maternity leave.

 

Sure, talk to her about it. Just understand that you trodding on dicey ground, and an "adverse employment action" is interpreted pretty broadly by the courts.

 

But talking is okay. As long as you never once during the course of the conversation refer to her pregnancy.

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Step 1: Confront this job performance

Step 2: Let her mention the pregnancy, game on then for further inquiry. Do inquire if she has a medical excuse for her slowness ....Most doctors do have written orders for a lady in her last trimester on Lifting and standing for long periods of time. As an employer you have a right to inquire to place in her files.

Step 3: Write her up, Documentation in HR is important when employee's have used up their excuses. No you are not treading on a lawsuit for poor job performance.

 

As to the dress attire A gentle company email to remind folks of policy should do, if after a few days she still hasn't complied, then make it a written warning.

 

Your position warrants proper directives and remands. Whether you ever bore a child or not, there are professional etiquette to comply with. You would be doing her a favor by reminding her that she is equal to the same rules.

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threebyfate

Let's role play. Here's the possibility of part of your convo with Preggo.

 

allina: P, we have a dress code of business casual at xyz firm. Did you know that sweatpants and running shoes don't constitute business casual?

Preggo: I can't help it. I don't have anymore clothes that fit and find that the only clothing that feels comfortable due to my pregnancy, are sweats and running shoes.

allina: Can't you buy or borrow clothing that abides by our dress code?

Preggo: I can't afford to buy a new wardrobe for two months and have no friends who can lend me their maternity outfits. I didn't think it mattered since I don't see the public or deal with clients. Have you ever been pregnant? Do you realize how uncomfortable it is to be this way? Since I've been with the firm for so many years, I would hope the company would take my long-term loyalty into consideration and cut me some slack about something as unimportant as dress code while being pregnant.

allina: (what are you going to say?)

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Let's role play. Here's the possibility of part of your convo with Preggo.

 

allina: P, we have a dress code of business casual at xyz firm. Did you know that sweatpants and running shoes don't constitute business casual?

Preggo: I can't help it. I don't have anymore clothes that fit and find that the only clothing that feels comfortable due to my pregnancy, are sweats and running shoes.

allina: Can't you buy or borrow clothing that abides by our dress code?

Preggo: I can't afford to buy a new wardrobe for two months and have no friends who can lend me their maternity outfits. I didn't think it mattered since I don't see the public or deal with clients. Have you ever been pregnant? Do you realize how uncomfortable it is to be this way? Since I've been with the firm for so many years, I would hope the company would take my long-term loyalty into consideration and cut me some slack about something as unimportant as dress code while being pregnant.

allina: (what are you going to say?)

 

I would say something like:

 

"P, while we want to be as accommodating as possible, this is a place of business, and we do have a dress code. The company dress code if clearly outlined on our employee handbook, which you have read and signed. We are unable to make an exception for you, it wouldn't be fair. I am willing to work with you on this, please feel free to e-mail me or stop by my office if you have questions about what is acceptable and what isn't, but we cannot allow sweat pants."

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girlygirl25

I have a coworker who is about 5 months pregnant right now. She is not incredibly huge yet, but she is still dressing nicely. I doubt she would ever come to work in sweat pants, but I'm sure she will begin to dress more "comfortably." And maternity clothes are very expensive, I have heard.

 

As for job performance, I do know that older women have rougher pregnancies (my coworker is 38) because of hte change in hormones. She gets her work done, but leaves early ALL THE TIME and dumps her work on me because I come in after her. It's aggrevating, so I know how you feel.

 

She did tell me that it is VERY hard to work full time while being pregnant because her energy is zapped and she just feels nautious constantly. I'm trying to cut her a break also, but it is hard. So I guess my advice would be to try and cut her a break. When she comes back from maternity leave you can see if her behavior has changed.

 

Oh, and the comment about being a lower paid employee at 50 G made me laugh!

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laRubiaBonita

i am sure SF has awesome thrift and consignment shops!!!!

 

pregnancy wear is something that should be fairly easy to find- and one would think since it's only worn about a year- it should be in pretty good condition and hopefully cheaper.

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i am sure SF has awesome thrift and consignment shops!!!!

 

SERIOUSLY!

 

I wouldn't engage her the way TBF suggested at all. Rather, I'd just straight to what you were going to say.

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threebyfate
I would say something like:

 

"P, while we want to be as accommodating as possible, this is a place of business, and we do have a dress code. The company dress code if clearly outlined on our employee handbook, which you have read and signed. We are unable to make an exception for you, it wouldn't be fair. I am willing to work with you on this, please feel free to e-mail me or stop by my office if you have questions about what is acceptable and what isn't, but we cannot allow sweat pants."

So what happens if she continues to wear sweat pants, now that you've drawn a hard line?
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i am sure SF has awesome thrift and consignment shops!!!!

 

pregnancy wear is something that should be fairly easy to find- and one would think since it's only worn about a year- it should be in pretty good condition and hopefully cheaper.

 

Yep! And if she wants new she can easily find a pair of pants at Target or JC Penny or some other cheaper store for under $10!!

 

SERIOUSLY!

 

I wouldn't engage her the way TBF suggested at all. Rather, I'd just straight to what you were going to say.

 

Yeah I would do that. The example TBF wrote out would never happen. P would never make a case like that or challenge me like that anyways. She would just sit there and say "Sorry, ok, ok."

 

So what happens if she continues to wear sweat pants, now that you've drawn a hard line?

 

I guess nothing. While I personally find it unacceptable, I have decided to say "f*ck it, not my problem."

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threebyfate
I guess nothing. While I personally find it unacceptable, I have decided to say "f*ck it, not my problem."
Technically, it's not your problem unless her immediate supervisor or management has come to you to complain about it. HRs role normally isn't to interfere unless it's asked.

 

But yes, if a preggo is wearing clean and untattered clothing and doesn't directly interact with the public or clients, I personally wouldn't touch a dress code violation with a ten foot pole. It makes no sense to expose the company to civil suit for an issue that will cease to exist in less than two months. If she comes back from leave just as sloppy, then it will be easy to get rid of her.

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Technically, it's not your problem unless her immediate supervisor or management has come to you to complain about it. HRs role normally isn't to interfere unless it's asked.

 

But yes, if a preggo is wearing clean and untattered clothing and doesn't directly interact with the public or clients, I personally wouldn't touch a dress code violation with a ten foot pole. It makes no sense to expose the company to civil suit for an issue that will cease to exist in less than two months. If she comes back from leave just as sloppy, then it will be easy to get rid of her.

 

Yup, you're right. Though it does bother management it's not enough to do anything about it. It bothers me because I hate sloppiness. For violations like this it is my job to point out things I notice but I'm not going to bother.

 

What a dumb job :rolleyes::rolleyes::laugh:

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