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Falling fast for my Manager


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Old 11th February 2010, 12:49 AM   #1
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Falling fast for my Manager

Heyo just recently joined this site today, and since I'm looking for some opinions, thoughts, and/or advice for my predicament, I figured I'd post it here.

Sorta Long Story Ahead



Well basically I'm falling for my manager, and fast. For the sake of a less confusing post, I’ll call my manager Jason. Well, he tends to spend most attention towards me. Always making conversation and so on. He also goes out of his way to just act silly with me and seems to try to have me close to him.

But he also tends to give me mixed signals. At a company outing, everything was going great, but towards the end of the outing, he seemed to a give a lot of his attention towards some other girl that night. This leads me to believe that either A.) he really doesn't quite like me as much as I think he does or B.) he does like me but figures it's not going to happen either way because he's my manager and I'm his sales associate.

I’ve talked to one of the assistant managers [Ill call him Ryan] about it because we’re really close. Well it just so happens that Jason knows I like him.

Ryan and I talked about dating and relationships within the company, and he says it very risky. Jason is very into his job and wouldn’t take the risk of dating an employee.

A part of me figures I should just back off and stop flirting with him because he may not like me. Maybe he just likes flirting around with his fellow employees?

If he does like me though, I'd like to risk it. But one of us would have to quit because a secret can only be a secret for so long, plus there is one co-worker, who, if she found out any sort of scandal about Jason, would be calling up our District Manager immediately to fire him because she cannot stand him.

Basically, I want this relationship to happen. I want to get together and get to know more than just Jason the Manager. But maybe I shouldn't. I've been trying to pry and see if maybe he has similar interests in me, but so far all of my attempts have failed, and Ryan refuses to ask him, stating that "this isn't highschool". Which is true. I tend to be a bit juvenile but I'm so darn curious, because if I knew for sure he was interested, then I would probably be more confident and daring with him to see what would happen or what he would do.

But perhaps I should just accept the fact this may be a lost cause?

Last edited by EvieJolie; 11th February 2010 at 12:58 AM..
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Old 14th February 2010, 12:14 PM   #2
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What does your company handbook state about its dating policy? While most may not touch the dating of peers, most will have a policy in place about dating or close relationship between supervisors and subordinates. The reason this is such a "no no" is because of the possiblity of liability to the company in regards to perceived/accusations of sexual harassment (if/when the relationship does bad), perception of unfair treatment towards this employee by the supervisor by the other employees, just a messy situation in general.

If you want to date him, my best advice to you is to transfer departments so he is no longer your direct supervisor. That would help eliminate the stickiest part of the equation. But I would read up on the policies your company has in place because the company can terminate either/both employee is certain situations.

Plus, look at your side personally, if you date him and it doesn't work out, can you continue working with him without it being an issue? If he starts dating another employee can you work with both of them without an issue?
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Old 15th February 2010, 11:56 PM   #3
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He is smarter than you think. He will never jeopardize his job for romance. The best advice is to stay away from destructive office gossips and office romances.
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Old 16th February 2010, 12:02 AM   #4
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PLEASE DON'T DO IT. There is no way that this will end well for you if you go down that road with him. He will throw you under the bus to save his job. And giving up your job for someone you barely know is not worth it.
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