Is she into me or am i just being paranoid?

[schatzy62]

I work a a small business with 9 other people. The very nice lady came towork with us about 2 years ago.

 

I am single and 47 years old. She is 40-41 I am guessing based on she graduated from high school in 1986.

 

I found out almost immediately that she had just recently split from her husband. He had and still cheats on her.

 

Then about 6 months after she had started working with us I had asked her if she would like to go to dinner. I made it clear that I was not asking for a date or sex, but thought it would be nice to take her to dinner and maybe get to know her a little better before asking her to maybe start a relationship with me. She mentioned that she did not want to go for dinner and that she was actually seeing someone. I was fine with that, but also stated to her that i thought we could be friends and still possibly see each other outside of work as we both have some of the same interests.

 

A month later she mentioned she was going to a concert and I said back to her well maybe I will see you there. I had the tickets for the same concert and had had them for over a month. She kind of went crazy. I did not understand it and then she ended up not going to the concert because I was going to be there.

 

We have remained friendly at work and i have occasionally asked her if she would like to go get ice cream or diner and also told here that her kids could come along. I just thought we could be friends.

 

I personally have been looking for a new place to live for about a year, I.E. a home that I own and not renting anymore. So as she does real estate I asked her to be my agent. I found a forclosed house and signed a contract to buy it. Because it si a forclosed home it is not an easy thing to get all the paper work done on as the banking system is so screwed up but that is for another story. The closing has been postponed 4 times now.

 

Since i signed the contract she has been making comments that I am not sure about. She seems to be very interested in me getting this house more than someone should. Like whenteh closing was postponed for the third time her coment ot me was "you will hear me screaming form my house when i get the notification of closing and i can't wait for you to get moved in so we can..." she stopped talking and refused to tell me what the last part of the comment was going to be.

 

I have also asked her to dinner a few more times just as friends but she keeps saying "no I have this to do tonight" or she will be going to her sisters house but always an excuse.

 

But she has never told me to stop asking and she texts me at unexpected times just to say "hope all is going well" or just like this morning I let her know that I was going to be out of the office for a doctors appointment and would be back in an hour and if anyone is looking for me I will be back in an hour. She texted me and stated "Good luck at your appt". There ar also other time where she comes to my office just to chat about things of all sorts or at other time she will hunt me down to ask me silly non work related questions that I could answer thru texts or e-mail or wait until she see me again.

 

I see no reason for her to do this, although I do enjoy it, but.

 

Another thing I found out just a few days ago that she had made a complaint about me to management here at work about stalking her over the incident of going to the same concert. I had not heard about his until so I am assuming work told her that there was nothing they could do about it as it was not work related and they can not say where I go on my off hours.

 

So what do you all think,

1. Is she interested in me

2. I am I over rationalizing this

3. Should I just wait and see what happens when I close on the house

4. Or is she just being extra nice to get her commission on the sale.

[mem11363]

What commission on the sale? Is the the realtor for the house?

 

She is NOT interested in you as a boyfriend - even if you persuade her to get involved with you it will end badly. She acts the way women do to men they have zero sexual interest in.

 

 

I work a a small business with 9 other people. The very nice lady came towork with us about 2 years ago.

 

I am single and 47 years old. She is 40-41 I am guessing based on she graduated from high school in 1986.

 

I found out almost immediately that she had just recently split from her husband. He had and still cheats on her.

 

Then about 6 months after she had started working with us I had asked her if she would like to go to dinner. I made it clear that I was not asking for a date or sex, but thought it would be nice to take her to dinner and maybe get to know her a little better before asking her to maybe start a relationship with me. She mentioned that she did not want to go for dinner and that she was actually seeing someone. I was fine with that, but also stated to her that i thought we could be friends and still possibly see each other outside of work as we both have some of the same interests.

 

A month later she mentioned she was going to a concert and I said back to her well maybe I will see you there. I had the tickets for the same concert and had had them for over a month. She kind of went crazy. I did not understand it and then she ended up not going to the concert because I was going to be there.

 

We have remained friendly at work and i have occasionally asked her if she would like to go get ice cream or diner and also told here that her kids could come along. I just thought we could be friends.

 

I personally have been looking for a new place to live for about a year, I.E. a home that I own and not renting anymore. So as she does real estate I asked her to be my agent. I found a forclosed house and signed a contract to buy it. Because it si a forclosed home it is not an easy thing to get all the paper work done on as the banking system is so screwed up but that is for another story. The closing has been postponed 4 times now.

 

Since i signed the contract she has been making comments that I am not sure about. She seems to be very interested in me getting this house more than someone should. Like whenteh closing was postponed for the third time her coment ot me was "you will hear me screaming form my house when i get the notification of closing and i can't wait for you to get moved in so we can..." she stopped talking and refused to tell me what the last part of the comment was going to be.

 

I have also asked her to dinner a few more times just as friends but she keeps saying "no I have this to do tonight" or she will be going to her sisters house but always an excuse.

 

But she has never told me to stop asking and she texts me at unexpected times just to say "hope all is going well" or just like this morning I let her know that I was going to be out of the office for a doctors appointment and would be back in an hour and if anyone is looking for me I will be back in an hour. She texted me and stated "Good luck at your appt". There ar also other time where she comes to my office just to chat about things of all sorts or at other time she will hunt me down to ask me silly non work related questions that I could answer thru texts or e-mail or wait until she see me again.

 

I see no reason for her to do this, although I do enjoy it, but.

 

Another thing I found out just a few days ago that she had made a complaint about me to management here at work about stalking her over the incident of going to the same concert. I had not heard about his until so I am assuming work told her that there was nothing they could do about it as it was not work related and they can not say where I go on my off hours.

 

So what do you all think,

1. Is she interested in me

2. I am I over rationalizing this

3. Should I just wait and see what happens when I close on the house

4. Or is she just being extra nice to get her commission on the sale.

[O'Malley]

Another thing I found out just a few days ago that she had made a complaint about me to management here at work about stalking her over the incident of going to the same concert. I had not heard about his until so I am assuming work told her that there was nothing they could do about it as it was not work related and they can not say where I go on my off hours.

 

Never presume to know what information management has been notified of, or what their reaction to it is. How did you become aware that your coworker has (allegedly) made a complaint about you?

 

Your coworker is not interested in you romantically and if she has made a complaint against you this is the time to keep your professional reputation above board, regardless if you are censured or not. Keep your nose to the grindstone; do not be drawn into any discussions with her that are not work related. If possible, if you must discuss business with her, try to have other coworkers present. Otherwise, appear 'busy' if she attempts to initiate non work conversation and don't allow yourself to be drawn into discussions about the situation (including her complaint to management) with your coworkers.

[datingadvisor]

From what you are saying it really doesn't seem like your coworker is interested in you - not sure I'm understanding the commission aspect of it in terms of your home though...?