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Am I working too hard for too little? Or not?


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Hi guys! I'll try to make this as short as I can.

 

I've been at my job for 2 and a half years. I started out part-time, then moved to full-time a little over a year ago. I started the job doing menial tasks (the sort of stuff a part-time office worker does) then moved up. Now, I'm one of the most senior members of the staff in the office. I work as an Inside Sales rep, handling customer calls and going over terms and conditions of our services, maintaining relationships with them, and making sure they're taken care of.

 

Anyway, I'm feeling like I deserve more! When I first got this job, it was a godsend. It got me out of a bad situation and I was genuinely thankful to have it. I felt like I could really do something here. The reason I worked part time for so long was because I was taking care of my daughter and trying to iron stuff out from that "bad situation" I mentioned before. Things stabalized, and my daughter's older now, so it was possible for me to go full time.

 

I make $9 an hour at this job. My roommate (whose a prep-cook & dishwasher) makes at least $12 per hour, maybe more. I handle ALL of our big accounts, AND do the IT work on the side for this company. I get pretty good medical benefits, which is good, because I'm a diabetic. I need those. The thing is, it costs a lot of money to support my daughter... not to mention gas, food, etc. I just feel like I'm doing a lot of work for a cheap wage.

 

Here's my dilemna. My boss is my brother-in-law, and the company is his company. My sister and he started it about 5 years ago. I was here for nearly 3 of those years, and help build the system on which it's run. He's really anal about trying to treat me "the same as everyone else", meaning that he doesn't want people to think I get special privileges since I'm his brother-in-law. I'm scared because it feels like this is a great job, and I don't know if I'd be good at anything else.

 

I screwed up my life and dropped out of college, so I feel like I'm stuck with whatever life hands me. I'm dying, though. $9 an hour just isn't enough for me, and I'm barely scraping by. There's no way I can afford school at this point. Plus, I don't know if I'd get the same kind of insurance if I found another job.

 

My question is, should I look for another job and risk all of that? Or should I not expect to get paid more than I am? He's really bad at giving raises and reviews... I've never gotten a review, and the only raise I got was when I went from part-time to full-time and accepted this Inside Sales position... which was over a year ago. I feel like he's screwing me over, and that I'm doing WAY too much work for what I'm being paid. It makes me want to just give up.

 

I'm not worried about hurting his feelings or something. Like I said, he wants to keep the "family" part out of it, at least while at work. Honestly, I don't really have a "family" type relationship with him, since I've been working here for so long. What should I do?? I'm just scared that I'm not qualified for another job? I don't wanna go work at some retail store again!!

 

Please, someone, help me out with this! Or give me your two cents!!

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You, my friend, have put in your time! Now, go to a career counsellor or agency/headhunter/ emplyment agency. You will be surprised how much help you can get just by calling people who know other people who can get you where you need to be, which is out and above the poverty line.

 

Your grammar is very good. There is no way you need to settle for poverty-line wages. Does your sister have anything to say? I mean, wow! I wonder if Dunk'n'Donuts pays better than her husband. What a prik. Like, thanks for helping me get ahead, bro!

 

Get online or go to your local social services offices for help with revamping your resume to include all the skills you are capable of delivering and any new skills you've learned recently. A good resume gets you seen and heard. "What colour is your Parachute" is a famous book to help with job hunting and resume writing.

 

Get it done and get the heck out! You need to take some risks in life. The only way to overcome mediocrity is to be prepared to fail. Don't be scared. Go on job interviews during your lunch break. Wear nice clothes to your interviews. Start the bidding at $15.00/hr and take computer courses. Take computer courses. Take computer courses. Get into IT if you have a knack for it.

 

Good luck!!! Get out!!! Take your time and get paid. There is no better revenge than living well. Especially when it comes to family.

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Thank you so much for the reply, Jolene! I feel a little more empowered now that I've got another opinion. I wasn't sure if I was expecting too much, but you hit it right on the head when you said, "Thanks for helping me get ahead, bro!" I feel that way!

 

I wanted to ask, do you think I should start looking through a temp agency? How should I go about finding a permanent job? I'd love to go to school for computer courses, but that will have to come when I get another job.

 

And also, why $15.00 an hour? Is that a good starting point? Should I approach all the jobs that way?

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Don't temp unless you have to. Most employment agencies will have reps that offer temp spots or perm spots...you tell them you seek to find a good fit in the right perm spot.

 

What the agencies won't tell you, typically, is that when an employer sees or finds out that you have worked at several temporary positions, they panic and figure you have not been employed permanently due to some defect in your work ethic, potential illness or absenteeism. The stupidity of it is that all employers should realize that many temp spots don't have potential for long-term (some do, some don't) regardless of how wonderful a temporary employee has demonstrated themselves. An employer often needs a temp and only a temp, so that when another worker comes back from maternity leave or when someone with decades of experience comes to them in an interview, they want to keep that other specific person and still maintain a budget. Also, there are bureaucratic hoops to jump through in some places and department heads don't get approval to hire you on, so you just move on. So you just never know, and instability is all that people will see on your resume if you list temp spots. Trust me on that. I have a friend in the hiring business who confessed.

 

Go for long-term and permanent. Then take continuing education courses. Five years from now, you won't recognize yourself or your salary. And depending on how motivated you are to succeed on your own, you can further your career advancement and learning at least until you reach a comfortable zone to focus on whether or not you want a family.

 

Do you think your brother-in-law is doing the old "Gotta be cruel to be kind"? Do you think he is keeping you supressed so that you want to succeed badly enough that you'll basically go out and get success no matter what the obstacles are?

 

Giving him too much credit, probably.

 

Anyway, nepitism isn't all it's cracked up to be. You don't want to be that guy in the office that everyone avoids because he's the bosses relative. That gets old real fast. My father was the branch manager at an insurance company and that's where I started out...so believe me, it's a starting ground, but politics can creep in and whether you realize it or not you've assumed the identity of your relatives and so you have automatic enemies as well as friends. Who wants that?

 

Take yourself seriously and I guarantee you'll go places.;)

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I'm not exactly sure what he's doing. It seems like he's doing the "be cruel to be kind" thing, but I do think that's giving him too much credit. The past few days, I've just been growing more and more sick of what's been going on with this.

 

I'm going to sound like I'm complaining, but over this Christmas weekend, I asked for Friday off in order to go out to California a day early, to spend Christmas with my daughter. He said he has an issue with people asking for days off before and after holidays, which I understand. He ended up giving it to me anyway, however. Then, upon coming back to work on Monday, I learned that everyone's Christmas bonuses was a pair of hockey tickets and $20 to spend at the game, along with other miscellaneous stuff like coffee mugs and stuff. Anyway, I went and asked him yesterday about my hockey tickets and he said that I wouldn't be getting any. He said that "maybe he didn't make himself clear" that since I'd taken that Friday off, I wouldn't be getting the Christmas bonus. He hadn't even talked about the Christmas bonuses when I'd asked him about the day off! I didn't even find out about it until I got back. Not only that, but I wasn't paid for that Friday either.

 

Sorry, I don't mean to keep bitching like this, but that was kind of the last straw. There's a woman here, who's been working here for about 5 or 6 months full-time... she took the entire week of Thanksgiving off, and yet she got her Christmas bonus and hockey tickets. I just feel like I'm getting stepped on. It makes me sick in a way.

 

So, anyway, I really don't think he's trying to help me with doing stuff like that. I just can't figure out what his motives are.

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justagirliegirl

Yes he is a cheap b$ast$rd and you are being taken advantage of.

 

Do the other employees have paid time off?

 

As for him not giving you the bonus he gave to everyone else that violates all sorts of labor laws.

 

Don't be afraid of temp agencies. Often times they lead to excellent perm jobs and they usually pay quite well. Much more than $9 an hour.

 

Ask for at least $15. With you IT skills you could probably get more than that.

 

Good Luck! You deserve much better!

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I don't have a lot of experience in this field and i can see that your brother in law is ripping you off. You should be getting paid way more than you are, and the fact that you are uncomforatable about talking to him about your salary is to his advantage. You need to leave that job so that you are able to work somewhere and be able to discuss your concerns with your boss without worrying about family matters.

 

Look at salary.com for an idea of how much you should be making. Talk to friends, not co-workers, about what they are making if both of you are comfortable with it. I know that you should be making way more than you are though.

 

It'll be better for you in the end.

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There's no way I can afford school at this point.

 

If you really want to go to school, you don't neccessarily have to pay for it all out of pocket at once. Have you tried filling out the FAFSA? You said you have a daughter to support, so there's a good chance that you'll get some money, at least in loans, if you apply for FAFSA. Also, you don't neccessarily have to go back to a traditional college. There are lots of legitimate schools out there that offer short term programs tht are less than a year long. I think if you had some sort of degree under your belt it would really help you in terms of finding a new job or negotiating with your boss.

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I just can't figure out what his motives are.

 

Real easy.....he is married to your sister. She feels obligated to at least be perceived as doing the charitable thing, which in this case is giving you a job. He is trying to stay out of the dog-house.

 

Be careful with temping. If you aren't given enough work to sustain your lifestyle, you may end up having to go back to Mr. Scrooge there and beg for your old job back, and he will be even worse than he is now. It would be like a young girl coming back home pregnant and barefoot to the shock and dismay of her parents. Not good.

 

Good luck to you! Go get what you deserve and don't look back.

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sunshinegirl

I'm sorry about your situation. As someone who teaches and trains people in negotiation skills, I would suggest the following (some of which have already been mentioned by other posters):

 

(1) Do your research on salary.com or vault.com or monster.com or some such to see what you *should* be making in your current position given your current responsibilities. If you have peers of any kind at your company, see if you can find out their salaries. Let's imagine, after doing all this, that you learn that your work is worth $13/hr.

(2) Start interviewing elsewhere. Before you talk to your boss you want to have a sense of how good or bad your immediate "walk-away" is, whether it's temp work or a full-time position elsewhere. Nothing gives you more power at the negotiation table than knowing you have a good alternative. Let's say you line up a good temp job that pays $15/hr, but without health insurance and no guarantee of it turning into a long-term job.

(3) Now, use the info you learned in steps 1 and 2 to have a conversation with your BIL. Paying you what you are worth has nothing to do with being treated 'special' because you are related to the boss; it is about treating you FAIRLY given your market value. Your boss/BIL may be open to that line of reasoning IF he is truly worried about being nailed for treating you in an unfair manner. If you can give him market standards that can help him defend what he pays you to other people, you may eliminate his reasons for paying you less.

(4) Be careful not to assume that your BIL is a complete dick and let that 'leak' through in your tone when you talk with him. It's possible (even if not likely) that he doesn't realize how unfairly he is treating you, so I would be careful not to burn a bridge unnecessarily.

(5) Let's say he is open to paying you more and agrees to pay you, say, $12/hr (because maybe he is, after all, really a skinflint and doesn't want to match the $13/hr rate you researched back in step 1).

(6) Now you face a decision between keeping your current job, at a pay of $12/hr with good health benefits, vs leaving to take a temp job at $15/hr but no health insurance.

 

This is where your priorities and tolerance for risk/uncertainty come in. We can't help you decide which job is the best one to take - stay in a job where you still don't feel like you're being paid what you're worth, but you're getting MORE money and have the health insurance you need? Or take a new temp job that would pay you more hourly (and might help you get even better pay down the road at a different company) but where you're SOL for health insurance and without an employment guarantee down the road?

 

But at that point at least you will be choosing between two concrete possibilities. I would strongly recommend AGAINST quitting your job out of frustration when you don't have anything else lined up.

 

One last thing:

 

As for him not giving you the bonus he gave to everyone else that violates all sorts of labor laws.

 

As Scrooge-like as it was for the bos/BIL not to give the OP a bonus, bonuses are not an entitlement, so I'd be curious to learn what labor laws he's violated.

 

Best of luck to you!!

 

Sunshinegirl

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Thank you guys so much for your advice. I was feeling pretty desperate and think WAY too much about it over the New Years days. I'm going to check salary.com right now. I am planning to apply at other jobs before coming and talking to him about this. I definately do not want to drive a wedge between us, and I genuinely care about his business and his family (my family). I thought it would be advantageous for me to work here since that would be one less person he'd have to worry about. Anyway, I definately need to be making more than this, and I just need to stay commited to finding something better. I've got to believe in myself, and follow through with that confidence. It's always been an issue with me, and I think he might use some of that against me as well.

 

Once again, thank you guys SO much for giving me all these replies. I can't tell you how much it's helped to just get advice from a third party. I'll try to keep you posted on my progress, and thank you again!

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