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Something my former boss said to me


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I have never posted in this section of the forum before. I am not a religious person and do not attend church unless it's for a wedding, funeral, Christmas or Easter as part of the family time. On that topic, I digress, but I have always wondered about this, and this is perhaps the best possible place to put this question that has nagged me for a long time, so here goes (and this may be longer than I intend, be patient):

 

A few years ago, I was working for a company that outsourced special ed needs to school systems and I had a job working in a charter school. My boss would come in and check up on me. One day over lunch, we were having a chat about stuff and she told me this story. She was at the time in her mid fifties, many years ago she had one of her first jobs working as a teacher somewhere. A man teacher started working there one year and she felt an instant attraction to him, in her words. I got the impression it was pure, unadulterated lust. I am in my forties, and it does not really matter who reads this, as we are (supposedly) all adults here. Assuming that all who may or may not read this have had some experiences behind us, it would be foolish if not downright nieve of anyone to assume that one had not reached a certain age and that had ever happened. You meet this man/woman, and you are just instantly in lust with that person. Act on it? Well, yes, I can admit that I have acted on it. Looking back, I realize it was part of growth and development, ships that pass in the night sort of thing. The setting in which I met those men, I promise you, was not in a work setting, it was in my early/mid twenties when I was hitting bars and clubs until the wee hours, like so many do.

 

Here's where it gets ... Strange. To me at least. I thought she was going to tell me some story like they fell in love, the had a torrid affair that their coworkers never knew about, etc. But, no dice. Instead she said that awakened something in her she was so very concerned about. Until that moment, I did not know she was a religious person but proved herself to be once she said she went to church and prayed everyday for weeks on end. She felt that it was immoral to be feeling this way and she was hoping that Jesus would absolve her of this sin. She never told me how it was resolved, except that it obviously never happened with her and this guy.

 

Here's my question, and please forgive my ignorance if you find me to be so, but why would she tell me things like this? I mean, I have reached a certain point in life now where I realize that a person's sex life (mine or someone else's) is none of my business and I don't discuss things like that with others, especially on the job. It left me feeling kind of, strange as well. She was painting this picture of herself as being this goody goody, not that she was saying she was better than me or anyone else for doing what she did, but ... Was she trying to say that to me? That she WAS a goody goody and therefore better than me or anyone else for not acting on some primal urge? Thoughts? If this isn't an appropriate post to make in the religion / spirituality section, sorry about that.

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It does seem an odd thing to tell a co-worker. What were you discussing before she said this to you? Had you been talking about men or dating?

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but ... Was she trying to say that to me? That she WAS a goody goody and therefore better than me or anyone else for not acting on some primal urge? Thoughts? If this isn't an appropriate post to make in the religion / spirituality section, sorry about that.

 

Did you let her speak her whole story out or did you interject with your own tales of similar 'lusty urges' tales?

 

It is of no matter anyway.

 

The woman was just telling her experience as it was for her, what happened and how she dealt with it. Simple as that.

 

She was not judging you nor asking to be judged by you.

 

She was a woman of Faith, as she has every right to be.

 

It may not be your way but that was not the point, she was just having a conversation.

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Did you let her speak her whole story out or did you interject with your own tales of similar 'lusty urges' tales?

 

It is of no matter anyway.

 

The woman was just telling her experience as it was for her, what happened and how she dealt with it. Simple as that.

 

She was not judging you nor asking to be judged by you.

 

She was a woman of Faith, as she has every right to be.

 

It may not be your way but that was not the point, she was just having a conversation.

 

I honestly do not remember how we got onto this topic. I certainly was not telling her a tale of some past instance involving sex (with me or someone else). And I guess it was just that, we were having a conversation about stuff rather than work related things. Something about it bothered me, I guess I am not sure as to how and why she chose to share this with me and for what purpose other than just to tell me.

 

There was an ironic twist to this tale. I actually had a thing for one of the man teachers who worked there and he would reject me. So much for that. Ha ha ha ...

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  • 1 month later...

Who the hell knows why people get evangelical about anything really? They just do, they have some experience think they've seen the light and feel the need to burst forth with their epiphany at the oddest times. I don't think she said it for any particular reason, this is just her subconscious whatevers having a field day. I wouldn't put too much thought into it actually.

 

People are weird, I felt attraction towards another human being and prayed to God to not feel it. I mean it's just.....:confused: Maybe on some level she believes this is the Devil tempting her? Or maybe your coworker who rejected you talked to her about it and this is her clumsy way of telling you to knock off the advances in the workplace?

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mortensorchid
Who the hell knows why people get evangelical about anything really? They just do, they have some experience think they've seen the light and feel the need to burst forth with their epiphany at the oddest times. I don't think she said it for any particular reason, this is just her subconscious whatevers having a field day. I wouldn't put too much thought into it actually.

 

People are weird, I felt attraction towards another human being and prayed to God to not feel it. I mean it's just.....:confused: Maybe on some level she believes this is the Devil tempting her? Or maybe your coworker who rejected you talked to her about it and this is her clumsy way of telling you to knock off the advances in the workplace?

 

She never knew about my thing for him. I still think about how strange it was, people are weird after all.

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