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No self confidence


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Old 15th October 2017, 9:06 PM   #1
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No self confidence

Hi does anyone know of any self help books/videos/articles/techinques that helped them build self confidence? I don't know if I ever had any, I've always done that "fake it til you make it" technique but it's too fake I think. I just don't feel like I have much if anything to offer: maybe that's a self esteem issue but I want some confidence.

Thanks
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Old 15th October 2017, 9:14 PM   #2
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Are you religious?
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Old 15th October 2017, 9:17 PM   #3
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Unfortunately I'm not, but I am open to any ideas . Ty
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Old 15th October 2017, 9:21 PM   #4
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Unfortunately I'm not, but I am open to any ideas . Ty
OK, well, I loved the book So Long, Insecurity: You've Been a Bad Friend to Us by Beth Moore. I read the book and participated in a small group study of it and I thought it was excellent. It is a Christian book/study, though.
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Old 15th October 2017, 9:34 PM   #5
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There's a book by Leo F. Buscaglia, PH.D. entitled "Personhood, The Art of Being Fully Human". I have a relative who is a Professor and he recommended it.

Good luck!
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Old 15th October 2017, 10:24 PM   #6
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Do you currently have an exercise routine??

I feel like sometimes I wear out this advice, but really,. with regard to this topic, other than my professional accomplishments, I pretty much live for my training..

It gives me just about everything...It's helped me through some difficult times..The feeling of being strong of body really has an amazing effect...There is a definite and noticeable aura around those of us..You walk differently, people treat you differently...The endorphins eclipse any illegal/recreational drug out there..for me, at least...

And best of all, if you do it right, it makes you tired...You have less time to ruminate over the petty garbage happening in your life...You sleep better..

This and many forms of meditation, and for me, music....Music does wonders as well for a general feeling of well being....for many.

TFY..
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Old 15th October 2017, 10:26 PM   #7
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What are you good at? Hobbies? Interests?
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Old 15th October 2017, 11:38 PM   #8
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Do you currently have an exercise routine??

I feel like sometimes I wear out this advice, but really,. with regard to this topic, other than my professional accomplishments, I pretty much live for my training..

It gives me just about everything...It's helped me through some difficult times..The feeling of being strong of body really has an amazing effect...There is a definite and noticeable aura around those of us..You walk differently, people treat you differently...The endorphins eclipse any illegal/recreational drug out there..for me, at least...

And best of all, if you do it right, it makes you tired...You have less time to ruminate over the petty garbage happening in your life...You sleep better..

This and many forms of meditation, and for me, music....Music does wonders as well for a general feeling of well being....for many.

TFY..
Thank you for the book suggestions. I will definitely be checking those out. I am very interested in starting to work out and meditate. I want to start lifting. This gives me motivation! Thanks
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Old 15th October 2017, 11:39 PM   #9
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What are you good at? Hobbies? Interests?
Nothing I'm particularly good at
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Old 16th October 2017, 12:10 AM   #10
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No books or anything but I recently heard a quote that said something along the lines of "ask yourself who in your life adds what to your life, and if the answer is nothing substantial then you need to ask yourself why you listen to them. Then you will discover that you do not need to put much time and energy into what people think of you."

That hit home with me and it's been working very well ever since.
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Old 16th October 2017, 12:11 AM   #11
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Nothing I'm particularly good at
Everyone is good at something; you just haven't found it yet. What do you like to do in your spare time? Or better yet if you could do anything in your life as a job, what would it be?
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Old 16th October 2017, 1:32 AM   #12
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Nothing I'm particularly good at
Could this be you talking yourself down?

For instance, I think I'm good at dressmaking. Yet, every second project goes in the bin. Do you know what those binned things are? Learning experiences.
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Old 16th October 2017, 5:39 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by Cookiesandough View Post
Hi does anyone know of any self help books/videos/articles/techinques that helped them build self confidence? I don't know if I ever had any, I've always done that "fake it til you make it" technique but it's too fake I think. I just don't feel like I have much if anything to offer: maybe that's a self esteem issue but I want some confidence.

Thanks
My dear why don't you start from learning who you are really inside I did.
Start learning how to do a deep meditation. I walk with confidence, when I go out and in stores. I am no ones fool, I am me and I am proud to be me. Can you say the same thing. If not then you need to reach out for help I can teach you how to be a better person from within. You worry too much about things. I stay happy and carefree... I do care but when I with someone close then I will be. I am not with anyone now. So I can help once again. You should start with healing yourself, ground yourself then you meditate You can play 3 different type of music at the same time. Very easy to do today on laptop. Then sit back and relax. Lay down on the bed focus and just let yours self go. Best to do this at night or in a dark room it has to be dead silence.
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Old 16th October 2017, 8:55 AM   #14
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Success breeds success.

Set some little easily attainable goals & achieve those -- lose 5 pounds; clean the house (or a specific room) by Friday; do a couch to 5k etc.

As you succeed in those goals you will gain the confidence to take on bigger more difficult tasks. You will also begin to see yourself as a winner.
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Old 16th October 2017, 2:54 PM   #15
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I think this is a good list:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...nd-self-esteem

My shortlist from that list:

1) Exercise (mix of weight lifting and cardio) is a huge one.
-Cardio boosts endorphins
-Building muscle makes you feel strong and powerful, stand taller, etc.
-Makes you feel more attractive

2) Another big one (at least for me) is being creative.
Takes my mind off things so I can't overthink.

3) Spend your time with people that lift you up and have qualities that you admire.

Last edited by olivetree; 16th October 2017 at 2:57 PM..
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