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Dealing with "Those People"


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You know. Those people who disagree with everything you have to say. I mean EVERYTHING.

 

People you just can't ever be right around.

 

People who take what you say, rephrase it, and tell you how wrong you are.

 

People who meticulously read every word you write/say, and re-read it, until they can find something to disagree with.

 

What I am particularly interested in is the mechanics behind this phenomena. What is it that causes these people to think in such a way, and is there a term for "Those People"?

 

Also, share you experiences you've had with "Those People". Tell me how it feels to be wrong all the time. I will read them all.

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People like that are generally seeking out someone who can handle them. Testing you to see if you can take their aggressive nature, turn them around and pin them to the mat. ;) Total submissives at heart.

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If they do it with only you, it's their way of showing they dislike you. If they do it all the time with everyone, it's an ego thing. I remember trying to connect with someone and she corrected everything I said. It was very irritating.

 

They are know-it-alls.

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Personally, unless you have to deal with them for work purposes I wouldn't bother with them.

 

I knew someone like that in a group I used to belong to. Whatever you said she knew more about it then you, always correcting you, whatever you did she's already done it twice...yawn.

 

Me, I'd walk away and let them talk to themselves.

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PegNosePete
People who take what you say, rephrase it, and tell you how wrong you are.

What, you mean people who point out when you say something wrong or inaccurate, twist it around to make it look as though you're picking on them for no reason, and suggest that maybe you should be more accepting of people with different opinions and viewpoints?

 

People who meticulously read every word you write/say, and re-read it, until they can find something to disagree with.

That should be "whom", not "who" ;)

 

is there a term for "Those People"?

On the internet: troll.

In real life: pedant, naysayer, pessimist, defeatist, downer.

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todreaminblue

Honestly kaiten I cant remember any of "those people" or their posts picking a fight.......am i one of those people is that why? i do however check likes on what i say......because my thoughts were appreciated or maybe helped in some way......and i appreciate that i could help.....i tend to stay out of really aggressive threads i think...unless i feel i want to share something i havent been attacked much really on here....i guess it is why i come back and share .........deb

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am i one of those people is that why?

 

lol no Deb, I am talking about in real life. That used to happen to me in a group that I hung out with all the time. It took me 5 years to break away from that.

 

When I got away from them my entire world changed. It was like I was a different person. but I wasn't very different. It's just that I was around people I could hold a conversation with now.

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todreaminblue
lol no Deb, I am talking about in real life. That used to happen to me in a group that I hung out with all the time. It took me 5 years to break away from that.

 

When I got away from them my entire world changed. It was like I was a different person. but I wasn't very different. It's just that I was around people I could hold a conversation with now.

 

 

smilin...my bad......

 

 

in real life

 

i have hung out with some pretty risky characters.....and nothing much shocks me....the truth is i have helped quite a few and they have helped me to see why i dont want to live that life......i have also learned that people who behave badly have often been treated badly and dont expect any different so when they get understanding and non judgement they pause for a while and think....even if it just is for a little while they pause and think and sometimes you can even touch their heart........enough to open up.......and giving love to the unloveable is so pure.......if you dont know what true ugly is you tend to mistake a facade or walls for true ugly.....i know true ugly have seen it..... can spot it......the only thing is i often get hurt by viciousness and lashing out from people who know no different but i make it through........by knowing in my heart there is more beauty than ugly....violets grow in deep dark shade you know ...so can people if someone nurtures them as well as the violets,

 

 

................deb

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I've come across many people like that, particularly so before I became self employed (now I choose to avoid those "types" entirely). Yes, chip on the shoulder syndrome going on there. They feel inadequate in many respects and thus they find a way to deal with that feeling, which is obviously entirely inappropriate. So, that said, when I do come across the "type" I try to avoid them as much as I can. Otherwise, eventually, I'd crack.

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A friend in my close circle is like this... with everyone.

And if I try and express my feelings or disagreement with anything around her, especially to do with this topic, she just talks over me with her own opinion and how mine is wrong. She doesn't so much as say I'm wrong, but tells me what is right.

Those conversations between us always end with me going 'whatever, I'm done talking with you about this.' She's tried to carry it on but it goes nowhere.

 

We're all aware of it, and for some reason it's just accepted. If she weren't part of our close group I'd simply disengage with her, but that's not possible. So I just don't get involved now, or walk away when it happens around me.

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You know. Those people who disagree with everything you have to say. I mean EVERYTHING.

 

People you just can't ever be right around.

 

People who take what you say, rephrase it, and tell you how wrong you are.

 

People who meticulously read every word you write/say, and re-read it, until they can find something to disagree with.

 

What I am particularly interested in is the mechanics behind this phenomena. What is it that causes these people to think in such a way, and is there a term for "Those People"?

 

Also, share you experiences you've had with "Those People". Tell me how it feels to be wrong all the time. I will read them all.

 

This is prefer simple actually. If possible just end all contact with those people. Not worth your time or energy.

 

Mea :-)

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You know. Those people who disagree with everything you have to say. I mean EVERYTHING.

 

People you just can't ever be right around.

 

My sister in law can be a bit like that. The most innocuous subjects can turn into a controversy when she's around. My mother takes it personally, and the two of them really don't get along. I find it far easier to just shrug it off. If people correct me and they're right in their correction, I appreciate the learning opportunity. If they correct me and I know very well that they're wrong I just say nothing and let them carry on blurting out inaccuracies.

 

I remember being at uni with this awful, disagreeable girl who really dislike me - but adored one of my friends (so I had to hang out with her more than I wanted to). We had a small study group for a particularly difficult assignment. After about 10 minutes I realised that she was going to leap on absolutely every opinion I expressed and rail aggressively about why it was wrong. So I just gave up and tuned out during the study group.

 

When the essays were marked and handed out, I'd got something like 75% (which was good on that course, they were stingy with the marks) and she barely scraped a pass. She confronted me furiously about the mark I'd received and ranted about how I'd known she was struggling with that essay, and I could have helped her but because I'm so damn competitive I refused to "share".

 

I didn't even bother trying to defend myself - for the same reason that I had given up trying to contribute to the study group. You can't reason with somebody as ignorant and aggressive as that. Better just to let them fail as a result of their "I know best" atttude.

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amaysngrace
A friend in my close circle is like this... with everyone.

And if I try and express my feelings or disagreement with anything around her, especially to do with this topic, she just talks over me with her own opinion and how mine is wrong. She doesn't so much as say I'm wrong, but tells me what is right.

Those conversations between us always end with me going 'whatever, I'm done talking with you about this.' She's tried to carry it on but it goes nowhere.

 

We're all aware of it, and for some reason it's just accepted. If she weren't part of our close group I'd simply disengage with her, but that's not possible. So I just don't get involved now, or walk away when it happens around me.

 

This is exactly what I do too. I turn a deaf ear to all of her blah blah blah.

 

Too much opinion but not enough wisdom for me, although she talks a good game.

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