Jump to content

My downfall, what is yours?


Recommended Posts

beautifulearth83

My downfall has been letting things go to my head. It's amazing some of the things I think, only to find out that not much has really changed. It's so easy for me to get high on feeling superior to others, to feel like I'm winning. And when I feel small, or low, it is like withdrawing from an addiction, and I try to reach that plateau again. I can feel it in my body, how I try to stretch myself and become taller. And I've notice that when you step on people, if they ever leave or knock YOU down, you're back where you started.

 

What would you say that your downfall is?

Link to post
Share on other sites
miss_jaclynrae

I focus wayyy too much on the future.

 

 

It overwhelms me sometimes. I want to get married, I want a house and nice new car, I want kids... I always feel like it is all so far away. I financially ****ed myself when I was newly divorce, I constantly stress about that.

 

 

Then things just roll and I fall into a pretty heavy depression where I feel stuck.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
beautifulearth83
I focus wayyy too much on the future.

 

 

It overwhelms me sometimes. I want to get married, I want a house and nice new car, I want kids... I always feel like it is all so far away. I financially ****ed myself when I was newly divorce, I constantly stress about that.

 

 

Then things just roll and I fall into a pretty heavy depression where I feel stuck.

 

:) I hear you. Being thirty, these pressures are becoming a reality. But I've also found a lot of peace is just enjoying what I have. Relationships usually suck, and there are a lot of people out there who are stressed out of their mind for the american dream. That's why I think it is important to create the Jaclyn dream, or the beautifulearth83 dream. You know what I mean?

 

I watched a documentary that involved married couples, and I think the best kind of relationship are two people who kind of really have a lot in common as far as where they want to be, and quirks aside, they work to get there together. But I don't know, I've been out of practice for awhile :D

Link to post
Share on other sites

My downfall is also one of my more positive traits. Being extreme.

 

There's no grey in my life. I either am or I'm not.

 

Being bold and opinionated has netted me the respect of a lot of my peers, but has also burned bridges with others.

 

I can be the most passionate lover you'll ever meet, and then if you wrong me, go ice cold the very next day and stay that way forever.

 

I don't forgive, or forget.

 

This kind of intensity has always pushed me to be a perfectionist. To be the best in whatever I choose to do. Take pride in whatever I do, be it writing, or love making, and anything in between.

 

It also crushes me more than it should when I fail.

 

Still though, I love being a classic scorpio. :)

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
beautifulearth83
My downfall is also one of my more positive traits. Being extreme.

 

There's no grey in my life. I either am or I'm not.

 

Being bold and opinionated has netted me the respect of a lot of my peers, but has also burned bridges with others.

 

I can be the most passionate lover you'll ever meet, and then if you wrong me, go ice cold the very next day and stay that way forever.

 

I don't forgive, or forget.

 

This kind of intensity has always pushed me to be a perfectionist. To be the best in whatever I choose to do. Take pride in whatever I do, be it writing, or love making, and anything in between.

 

It also crushes me more than it should when I fail.

 

Still though, I love being a classic scorpio. :)

 

I resonate with your statement concerning extremes and being a perfectionist. I'm beginning to think it is closely related to addiction, especially for people who have experienced glory in their lives. Sometimes I think I would benefit from playing a competitive sport.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm very picky about what I am passionate about. It is to the point of where I find myself having less and less in common with friends and at times I am not invited out with everyone else. Sometimes it bothers me but other times it doesn't because that usually means a night where I don't have to hear got awful top 40 songs and hip hop.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
I resonate with your statement concerning extremes and being a perfectionist. I'm beginning to think it is closely related to addiction, especially for people who have experienced glory in their lives. Sometimes I think I would benefit from playing a competitive sport.

 

When I like something, I stick to it. I overkill everything. When I want something, I have to have it, right that instant. I do what it takes to make that happen. I also overindulge in things I like. So like if I'm Netflixing a show and I really enjoy it, I can watch 10 episodes a day. If I'm with someone I'm really attracted to -- we can have sex five times a day. I just take it to the extreme.

 

So there's definitely an addictive trait in there -- the difference is, once you lose me, I'm done. For good.

 

I remember watching Lost on netflix, finishing 4 seasons in two weeks. But season 5 started to drag and I just stopped watching. Even though I invested all that time watching the previous 4 seasons. I couldn't care less how it ended.

 

I can go from texting you and talking to you every single day, having sex with you 5 times a day when we see each other -- to never speaking to you again if I felt you wronged me.

 

So I sway between infatuation, passion, intensity, etc to complete apathy and indifference. Like a switch. On or off. No middle ground.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine

I am extreme and intense. One wrong action can turn someone I really like into nothing - and there is no going back.

 

Although with people I don't care much about I am more measured. The more I care - the more extreme I get :p

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm too much of a people pleaser, which never ends well - for anyone. I bend, and break until I get frustrated and resentful, in turn people tend to believe I'm a pushover with no opinions/interests of my own. Horrible behaviour which I try to rectify, but... It's not easy.

 

I get to throw my weight around on the internet though, so that helps ;) It's easier with a mask.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm too sensitive when it comes to other people's moods. A co-worker can brush me off at work because they are in a bad mood that has nothing to do with me- and I'll take it personally and rack my brain trying to figure out what I did to make them mad at me. I'll even experience sleepless nights over stuff like this.

 

I never articulate this to anyone, just internalize it, and stress myself out. The next day, that same person will be in a better mood and be friendly again- and I tell myself I have to stop being so sensitive.

 

I always feel guilty, even when I have nothing to feel guilty about. I feel responsible for things I've had little or no part in.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

I lose interest very quickly. Whether it's hobbies or people. One bad thing and bam, interest gone. I'm learning to be more patient and that persisting isn't always a waste of time (though usually is ;))

Link to post
Share on other sites
kenneth1010

I had a few downfalls, some worse that others but i am in the process of real change, one of my downfalls as i got older and older (38 this year) was " i am too old to change "

 

But after reading this quote from the man of the moment for me, Bruce Lee

 

Are you going to make your obstacles stepping stones or stumbling blocks?
I used to believe in the latter, now i am firmly planted on the "stepping stones".

 

If you dont believe that you can affect real change, then guess what............

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
beautifulearth83

I resonate with most of these responses. From being too sensitive to others, not following through with things when something goes wrong and thinking it's too late to change. It's amazing how much of this is inside of us, or in our own heads. For example being sensitive to the moods of others is an internal process, a reaction. It happened to me at the end of work today. A co-worker was venting and said some inappropriate things, and I reacted, and still sort of feel it. But if you just kind of let it pass through you, they usually shut up. But unfortunately these sorts of things happen when I least expect it. I don't want to be on guard, but I don't want to be so vulnerable either. As far as losing interest in things, there are many things to be said about that, from focusing on the "how" of what you're dong, instead of just how it's going, to perhaps weighing whether or not what you're doing is causing unnecessary stress. Perhaps that could be explored more. As far as growing older, I often think about how somebody older than me sees things and deals with things, but I'm under the impression that there is a sense of there being no time really to sit around and wonder, but to actually engage and do things. I like the quote about the stepping stones, I sure experience those from time to time, and I'm grateful that the ones I'm given are bearable, though I get frustrated at times.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Setting my expectations too high and then the feeling of defeat when something either takes forever to happen or I am not able to have instant results.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I wish every day that I was actually an attractive person. My luck with girls is pretty much nonexistent and it bothers me every day even though I'm trying to train my mind for it not to.

Link to post
Share on other sites
bentleychic

I am an over thinker and tend to obsess over those thoughts when I get them. It tends to create problems for myself, in my head and in my relationships that wouldn't have been there if I hadn't made it an issue.

 

I hate it. :-/ I am my own worst enemy for sure when it comes to that.

Link to post
Share on other sites
todreaminblue

my downfall has always been when i am stressed out i take on more things and projects, mainly to forget why i am stressed out in the first place....but in actual fact it sets me up for failure...because i am not focused....deb

Link to post
Share on other sites
ThaWholigan

I'm afraid of my own power - I allow others to dictate my direction in life for fear of isolating myself and angering others. My one irrational problem. Everyone seems to be well aware of my potential and has more of a stake in my success and progression than I do - my only form of rebellion is to either do what I need to do, or do nothing :laugh:.

 

Needless to say, the latter is not an option.

Link to post
Share on other sites

So I sway between infatuation, passion, intensity, etc to complete apathy and indifference. Like a switch. On or off. No middle ground.

 

This worries me. A Scorpio has been emailing me for the past week or so and I had heard Scorpios were like that. He's been divorced for eleven years and no serious relationships since, or at least hasn't mentioned one, but Scorpios are very secretive, a trait I dislike. I wonder if he hates women deep down. Fortunately he isn't that attractive so I won't be pining for him. I will have to see how it pans out. What's the best way to dump this guy if it comes to that? He will see I'm still on the dating website, as is he. They don't tend to forgive and forget.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

i am overweight, and I have social anxiety to the max you put me in a room with a stranger i'll sit there like an idiot, i can't process things to say to start a conversation even if they start the convo i'm blank my mind is blank.. so i sit there quiet always quiet, people seem to give me glares like i'm a weirdo I also over think a lot too, but i'm trying to fix it. been hitting up the gym started this monday and i'm going to a doctor friday to hopefully refer me to a therapist so i can figure out my social anxiety.. i hate not being able to talk to people i wanna be social so bad but i just can't.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine

I can go from texting you and talking to you every single day, having sex with you 5 times a day when we see each other -- to never speaking to you again if I felt you wronged me.

 

So I sway between infatuation, passion, intensity, etc to complete apathy and indifference. Like a switch. On or off. No middle ground.

 

Not many people operate like this but I am pretty similar. I can be extremely infatuated with someone and come on too strong by other people's standards. So guys think that I am crazy about them, that they got me etc etc.

 

But then I lose interest, and I can lose it for a number of reasons, I swing to the other extreme. It's like a guy doesn't exist for me anymore. Nothing he does can change my mind. I find lots of guys get really puzzled by the extremes.

 

Usually when people are into someone, they struggle with their feelings for months or years. Not me. One week it's ON, next week it's OFF :cool:

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

I used to think my downfall was my temper. It almost did me in. I'm actually surprised I didn't go nuts and really get in trouble with the law other than just a night in a holding cell.

 

It hurt my relationships but made me feel invincible on the basketball court so I didn't fight it...and instead nurtured it.

 

Then I had my kids and it all started to change for me. Now people just talk about how much better my temper is and how amazing my change has been.

 

It feels pretty damn good. :)

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
This worries me. A Scorpio has been emailing me for the past week or so and I had heard Scorpios were like that. He's been divorced for eleven years and no serious relationships since, or at least hasn't mentioned one, but Scorpios are very secretive, a trait I dislike. I wonder if he hates women deep down. Fortunately he isn't that attractive so I won't be pining for him. I will have to see how it pans out. What's the best way to dump this guy if it comes to that? He will see I'm still on the dating website, as is he. They don't tend to forgive and forget.

 

Yeah we don't forgive or forget. I know I certainly don't.

 

At the same time, it's a good trait to have I think. Being apathetic.

 

If it doesn't work between me and a woman, I'm not harping on her, annoying her to give me another chance, nor am I plotting revenge against her or something. The day a woman tells me it's not working out is the last day we speak ever.

 

So if it comes to that, either do the fade out so he can get the message and move on, or you can tell him straight up it's not working. Either way you will more than likely not hear from him anymore if he is a classic scorpio.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I can be very sensitive by taking things personally and assuming. Still growing in this area by detaching with love when needed.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...