SpiralOut Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 I've been going to a chiropractor and am thinking maybe I should switch. But don't really know how to do so without being rude. I've never had this sort of problem before. He's a guy who seems nice enough. I got a letter in the mail welcoming me as a new patient, which is standard of course. He's not that much older than me and is married. Anyway, he seems to get annoyed easily. I am the type of person who can get along with almost anyone. But I seem to rub him the wrong way no matter what I do. He makes comments all the time about wanting to know how I felt after a session; he actually sounds kind of annoyed. So I'll tell him. And sometimes he's okay, but sometimes he'll get annoyed and go on a long explanation of how I can't expect things to heal right away, blahblah. Well I understand that, but I'm just telling you how I feel because you asked. He seems annoyed if I try to show that I understand what he's saying. He gets annoyed if I ask a question or make a comment that he thinks is stupid. I should mention that I work in the health field (but I'm not a Doctor) so I am not completely ignorant. He also asks too many probing questions. He asks me constantly about the weekend, which I know is normal for most people but for me I just hate that question so much. He asked me one time do I have a boyfriend. He sometimes gives me details about himself I don't really need to know. I think it's because he needs to talk all the time and gets nervous and says too much if I'm being quiet. I'm a quiet person. So I'll ask medical related questions to try and make him feel comfortable or whatever. I have many more sessions I need to go to since I have back problems. Am I being too sensitive, or is he kind of a dick? Should I just find someone else to go to? I don't like going in but it's not totally horrible. He seems to know what he's doing at least. I don't know. Link to post Share on other sites
january2011 Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 (edited) In my opinion, it's not a question of rudeness. Not only must your health professional be competent, but if you're spending a lot of time with them, they also need to be personable. You're going to be taking their advice and you're trusting them with your health. Switch doctors. Find someone you're more comfortable working with and who maintains professional boundaries. You are not his therapist. And asking you about your relationship status is crossing the line, in my opinion, unless he is trying to work out whether to address you as Miss or Mrs. Edited July 6, 2012 by january2011 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 It's not rude at all. He's the one who's being rude. To hell with him being offended if you change docs. It's his own fault. It serves the idiot right. Hopefully if enough people do this it'll tell him something. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 Pretty easy. Cancel any future appointments and make new ones with another provider. Not rude at all. Very professional. As business should be. Doctors get fired all the time. They're big boys and girls and know the drill. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author SpiralOut Posted July 6, 2012 Author Share Posted July 6, 2012 (edited) Yeah you guys are right. I skipped my appointment this morning without understanding why. I did not bother to call them back to re-schedule for next week either even though I knew that I should for my health. It must have been some part of me holding me back. It felt like he was trying to be my friend or something, which felt uncomfortable. I just want my back fixed. And he made comments about him and his wife being in bed together. WTF! I couldn't believe it. And he made vague complaints about what other patients do that annoy him. Why are you telling me this! I'm not happy about this but on Monday I'll have go back in and pay for the last session I still owe them for. It annoys me that I have to go back in. And I'll have to find somewhere else to go. I hate doing stuff like this, it is so annoying. It stresses me out. Thanks for listening to me vent. Edited July 6, 2012 by SpiralOut Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 Not only should you switch doctors, but you should also make a complaint against him. I've never understood why some people will except someone being rude towards them and just take it, and fear offending them as though that makes themselves the bad ones. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SpiralOut Posted July 6, 2012 Author Share Posted July 6, 2012 Not only should you switch doctors, but you should also make a complaint against him. I've never understood why some people will except someone being rude towards them and just take it, and fear offending them as though that makes themselves the bad ones. It's a bad habit I've had all my life. Explaining the reasons for it would take up too much space haha....I've been trying super hard to snap out of it. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 Yeah, the local DC board would likely be interested in his bedroom talk, amongst other inappropriate comments by him. Doubt it'll help but at least you did something to try. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 It's a bad habit I've had all my life. Explaining the reasons for it would take up too much space haha....I've been trying super hard to snap out of it. You don't have to be a doormat SO, fight back! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author SpiralOut Posted July 7, 2012 Author Share Posted July 7, 2012 (edited) You want me to fight back, okay. Well I don't appreciate your post where you say "I don't understand why some people . . . " You are not talking about "some people." You are talking about ME. We all have flaws. You don't see me going onto your threads and saying to you, "oh I don't understand why some people act like you." That's not very supportive. The least you can do is have the guts to tell me straight up what you are thinking about me instead of attempting to generalize it to "some people." In the future, please address me directly. Just say, "SpiralOut, I don't get why you're acting that way." Please don't pretend to be talking about other people when it's obvious that you are talking about me. Edited July 7, 2012 by SpiralOut Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 You want me to fight back, okay. Well I don't appreciate your post where you say "I don't understand why some people . . . " You are not talking about "some people." You are talking about ME. We all have flaws. You don't see me going onto your threads and saying to you, "oh I don't understand why some people act like you." That's not very supportive. The least you can do is have the guts to tell me straight up what you are thinking about me instead of attempting to generalize it to "some people." It comes across feeling like a put-down. Is that what you meant by it? That is your interpretation. Someone could make the most neutral remark on any subject and I'm willing to bet you would take it as a personal attack. That is what people with low self-esteem do. Everything is all about them. Ross is a very sweet, sensitive soul who wouldn't hurt a fly. He used to be a lot like you but has changed and now he even has his own fan club on LS! He probably feels terrible that you misinterpreted his remark about people he has observed. Ross, ignore her and fill out your job application! 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author SpiralOut Posted July 7, 2012 Author Share Posted July 7, 2012 (edited) That is your interpretation. Someone could make the most neutral remark on any subject and I'm willing to bet you would take it as a personal attack. That is what people with low self-esteem do. Everything is all about them. Ross is a very sweet, sensitive soul who wouldn't hurt a fly. He used to be a lot like you but has changed and now he even has his own fan club on LS! He probably feels terrible that you misinterpreted his remark about people he has observed. Ross, ignore her and fill out your job application! And this is your interpretation. Please allow Ross to stand up for himself. I told him how I felt and asked him what he meant by his comment. I don't understand why you are reacting so strongly to it. You'll also notice that I have edited my post since before you responded to it. Actually, I see why you are so annoyed. You do the same thing. You cannot direcrtly tell me, "Spiral Out, you have low self esteem. Everything is all about you." Instead, you say to me that "people" have low self esteem, and everything is all about "them." So I'll say the same thing to you: Please don't do that!! It's really irritating!! LOL. Edited July 7, 2012 by SpiralOut Link to post Share on other sites
january2011 Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 (edited) The following is going to sound harsh, so I apologise in advance: I told him how I felt and asked him what he meant by his comment. The first part is true. The second part is not. You told him that you didn't appreciate his post. You found it, "not very supportive." You told him that you know what he meant. Then instructed him on how to post in the future. Overall, an over-reaction and rather rude towards someone who has been in your shoes, knows how it feels and is trying to encourage you to stand up for yourself. Yes, my interpretation. As far as I can tell, everyone in this thread has tried to be supportive and encourage you to switch doctors. Rather than trying to pick a fight with someone online, why not use the energy you've gained and channel it to switch doctors? Make a positive impact on your offline life rather than trying to generate (negative) waves in your online life. Edited July 7, 2012 by january2011 4 Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 I've forgotten what the topic is about. Can someone help me? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author SpiralOut Posted July 7, 2012 Author Share Posted July 7, 2012 The following is going to sound harsh, so I apologise in advance: The first part is true. The second part is not. You told him that you didn't appreciate his post. You found it, "not very supportive." You told him that you know what he meant. Then instructed him on how to post in the future. Overall, an over-reaction and rather rude towards someone who has been in your shoes, knows how it feels and is trying to encourage you to stand up for yourself. Yes, my interpretation. As far as I can tell, everyone in this thread has tried to be supportive and encourage you to switch doctors. Rather than trying to pick a fight with someone online, why not use the energy you've gained and channel it to switch doctors? Make a positive impact on your offline life rather than trying to generate (negative) waves in your online life. Hmm actually I appreciate the directness of your post. You are right that I overreacted. And it's a good idea to channel my energy elsewhere. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 I've forgotten what the topic is about. Can someone help me? Whether or not SpiralOut should switch chiropractors. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
M30USA Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 Is it rude of them to charge you hundreds of dollars for a single visit even if they don't do anything except walk in the room? Is it rude of them to spend 6 minutes on an average office visit? Do what you gotta do. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SpiralOut Posted July 7, 2012 Author Share Posted July 7, 2012 Clearly I have problems. I'm sure that's at least one thing we can all agree upon. Either I'm a doormat or I'm being too aggressive. Ross, I'm sorry for overreacting to you. I should have worded things more politely instead of ripping your head off. Link to post Share on other sites
Sweett Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 If your current doctor makes you uncomfortable by all means switch. Do what makes you comfortable. I've done this before too and didn't think twice about it. Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 (edited) You want me to fight back, okay. Well I don't appreciate your post where you say "I don't understand why some people . . . " You are not talking about "some people." You are talking about ME. We all have flaws. You don't see me going onto your threads and saying to you, "oh I don't understand why some people act like you." That's not very supportive. The least you can do is have the guts to tell me straight up what you are thinking about me instead of attempting to generalize it to "some people." In the future, please address me directly. Just say, "SpiralOut, I don't get why you're acting that way." Please don't pretend to be talking about other people when it's obvious that you are talking about me. I ment you and other people. I didn't mean to be deceptive or offensive either. That is your interpretation. Someone could make the most neutral remark on any subject and I'm willing to bet you would take it as a personal attack. That is what people with low self-esteem do. Everything is all about them. Ross is a very sweet, sensitive soul who wouldn't hurt a fly. He used to be a lot like you but has changed and now he even has his own fan club on LS! He probably feels terrible that you misinterpreted his remark about people he has observed. Ross, ignore her and fill out your job application! Thanks! Clearly I have problems. I'm sure that's at least one thing we can all agree upon. Either I'm a doormat or I'm being too aggressive. Ross, I'm sorry for overreacting to you. I should have worded things more politely instead of ripping your head off. That's okay. Do you think you'll switch docs? Edited July 7, 2012 by Ross MwcFan Link to post Share on other sites
Author SpiralOut Posted July 7, 2012 Author Share Posted July 7, 2012 I ment you and other people. I didn't mean to be deceptive or offensive either. Thanks! That's okay. Do you think you'll switch docs? Yes. I can't go back to that weird guy. I feel too uncomfortable there. Link to post Share on other sites
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