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Ill try to keep this short as possible.

my gf and I split about a week ago- and simply put- its been DEVASTATING. However- up until yesterday I was thinking it was just a mistake, and that we would fix things. After reading MANY MANY threads and what some of the forum gurus had posted, ive come to the conclusion.... its OVER! (it is quite possibly the hardest thing to accept, i dont wanna believe it)

 

Right now i am an emotional wreck. I am NOT contacting my ex. I know not to do that. She simply had the "GIGS" as its referred to on here...

 

On top of that- I am very emotionally needy, and jealous (however I was good about not showing this side during our relationship). I have very low self esteem and feel that I will never be good enough.

 

The relationship I was in gave me some confidence- that I was loved by someone. Now that I lost that, I feel I've lost everything- my gf, my life, my dignity, my self-respect, my ego....

 

I KNOW Im not the only one that is like this. How do I work my way up from the bottom?

 

I already go to the gym, I eat healthy, i am pretty fit and active, and I do go to school. I just feel so insecure about myself and my life.

 

I am also asian- which also doesnt help- as bad as it is to say, I hate being asian. I wish I was white. Being raised in an area with mostly white ppl, I always felt different and self conscious about EVERYTHING.

 

help me :(

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First off, I'm sorry you have to go through this break up. They aren't fun. You're not alone, we all go through them. Second, you need to not depend on anyone...ANYONE for your happiness. You need to be happy independently in order to succeed in another relationship (which you will get in time). Find out new hobbies that attract you. Do things for yourself. Seek professional help..anything! Do what you feel you need to do to become your own best friend. In this life, you need to keep your head up high and thank your lucky stars. Your Asian...that's a bad thing why? Don't ever be ashamed of who you are when you have no reason to. Are you a good person? Do you respect others? Are a kind soul? I would only imagine you would be....why else are you on this forum site? You've got heart. Your heart is broken right now, but with strength, determination and positivity, you will soar through this little, tiny hole in your road. This is the perfect time to get your life back in order. Be you. Be happy. You can do this. Believe in yourself. I promise...from experience, it will get better and you will be so proud of yourself! Things could always be so much worse. Realize that it's really not that bad. You got this! Be strong and carry on, my friend. Believe in yourself (you know you want to ;) )

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First off, I'm sorry you have to go through this break up. They aren't fun. You're not alone, we all go through them. Second, you need to not depend on anyone...ANYONE for your happiness. You need to be happy independently in order to succeed in another relationship (which you will get in time). Find out new hobbies that attract you. Do things for yourself. Seek professional help..anything! Do what you feel you need to do to become your own best friend. In this life, you need to keep your head up high and thank your lucky stars. Your Asian...that's a bad thing why? Don't ever be ashamed of who you are when you have no reason to. Are you a good person? Do you respect others? Are a kind soul? I would only imagine you would be....why else are you on this forum site? You've got heart. Your heart is broken right now, but with strength, determination and positivity, you will soar through this little, tiny hole in your road. This is the perfect time to get your life back in order. Be you. Be happy. You can do this. Believe in yourself. I promise...from experience, it will get better and you will be so proud of yourself! Things could always be so much worse. Realize that it's really not that bad. You got this! Be strong and carry on, my friend. Believe in yourself (you know you want to ;) )

 

You know- i come to these forums to just vent out really- most advice i appreciate but they never "really" help. However your post did make me feel better just by your positivity.

 

Me being asian- well i just hated it cus i was different. There are all the stereotypes- and people who judge me at first sight really dont know me, cus all of my friends who do know me, know that im the whitest boy in the world. Seriously lol. Sure i look different, but im not different than anyone else.

 

my previous 3 gfs have all been white- and each time i thought I got lucky with them... I realize I am not a bad looking kid, but there are times wehre i just get super depressed and hard on myself...

 

time to pack on some muscles and start hittin up the dating pool ;)

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Maybe Asian chicks born in America aren't interested in Asian guys, but Asian chicks from Asia generally dig Asian dudes so maybe look in that direction, especially if you can speak their language.

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^ truth is i dont like asian girls- few are attractive, but im pretty picky with girls. my 3 exs were not asian.

One was Guatamalen

One was Italian/German

One was Macedonian

 

My type of girl is european, mediterannean. But thats besides the point...

 

 

I want to feel better about myself

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HeavenOrHell

It would be a good idea to work on your self esteem, something I'm still struggling with, rebuilding self esteem 2 years after my ex left me after 18 years, I'm trying to focus more on work and being happy with my own company rather than put my main focus on my current r/ship, which is never a good idea.

 

Don't jump straight into another r/ship until you've healed from your last one.

 

Do whatever you can to boost your self esteem but without looking for it in a r/ship, r/ships aren't there to boost our self esteem (although it's an added bonus).

 

 

Ill try to keep this short as possible.

my gf and I split about a week ago- and simply put- its been DEVASTATING. However- up until yesterday I was thinking it was just a mistake, and that we would fix things. After reading MANY MANY threads and what some of the forum gurus had posted, ive come to the conclusion.... its OVER! (it is quite possibly the hardest thing to accept, i dont wanna believe it)

 

Right now i am an emotional wreck. I am NOT contacting my ex. I know not to do that. She simply had the "GIGS" as its referred to on here...

 

On top of that- I am very emotionally needy, and jealous (however I was good about not showing this side during our relationship). I have very low self esteem and feel that I will never be good enough.

 

The relationship I was in gave me some confidence- that I was loved by someone. Now that I lost that, I feel I've lost everything- my gf, my life, my dignity, my self-respect, my ego....

 

I KNOW Im not the only one that is like this. How do I work my way up from the bottom?

 

I already go to the gym, I eat healthy, i am pretty fit and active, and I do go to school. I just feel so insecure about myself and my life.

 

I am also asian- which also doesnt help- as bad as it is to say, I hate being asian. I wish I was white. Being raised in an area with mostly white ppl, I always felt different and self conscious about EVERYTHING.

 

help me :(

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you are right- and thats the toughest part. i wanna date right away again- just to build my confidence and get it out of my system. I feel more depressed when I am alone. Its a flaw of my character, i need to learn to be happy with myself, but i can't be. I dont know how

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