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Depressed about my weight


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passion_flower

I've always thought of myself as chubby, even when I was a kid though I was classified as being on the slightly higher end of normal on the BMI scale. At school I was always between 10-11 stone and got up to 12 stone when I was at college. At 18 I decided enough was enough and dieted back down to 10 stone and a size 12 which I didn't seem to have any problems with.

 

I suffered psychosis at 22 and was put on anti-psychotics (aripiprazole) and saw my weight shoot up to 15 stone, I was eating a little more because it increased my appetite but as of now I've been off them 6 months and have cut out quite a lot but still have not lost as much weight as I would have liked.

 

I joined the gym last year but it just wasn't for me, I am asthmatic which doesn't help and I get self-conscious getting out of breath after 2 minutes on the cross trainer whilst everyone else is going at it full belt for ages. I enjoy cycling so hope to do that again now summer's coming. I also joined weight watchers but found it too much of a faff to keep entering what you've eaten into a database with the exact portions. I just really want to lose weight as I want to fit back into my old clothes without worrying about my stomach and get rid of these unsightly stretch marks on my arms and stomach I have seemed to have got. I hate having my picture took and don't really like looking in the mirror.

 

I feel some people kind of suit being fat but I am not one of those people. Unfortunately I seem to gain it to my face and I can't even fit on my old necklaces anymore.

 

My boyfriend is thin and I met him about 8 months ago and he says it doesn't bother him although he admits he would prefer it if I were to lose weight. It just makes me kind of mad because when we were on holiday together, even he said he ate more than me and he eats loads of cakes and doesn't put on a pound!

 

I just don't understand why it is so hard for me to lose this weight this time around..?

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A few questions...

 

How much do you weigh now and how tall are you?

How old are you?

And how physically active are you? As in how much of the day are you on your feet at work (if you work) walking around etc?

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passion_flower
A few questions...

 

How much do you weigh now and how tall are you?

How old are you?

And how physically active are you? As in how much of the day are you on your feet at work (if you work) walking around etc?

 

I weigh 14 and a half stone now and am 5"8

I'm 23, 24 next month.

I take my dog for a walk about once or twice a week. I work as an admin assistant so am sitting around a lot.

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Make time to walk your dog every day. You both should have a daily walk. Start with a shorter distance and build up to a longer distance, but aim to walk at least 45 minutes a day.

 

It is difficult for anyone to maintain a healthy weight with a sedentary lifestyle. Muscles burn calories, and movement builds muscles.

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Don't give up you can do it. I understand completely where you are coming from I've lost about 75lbs in the last year or so. It is possible. What has helped me is cutting down on my portions watching how much sugar I eat which isn't much but if I'm craving something I'll have a tiny bit to make the craving go away. And get up and move! Anything is a start just do what you can now and work your way up. Tell yourself you can do it don't doubt yourself and don't let yourself get depressed make that push you to do it. Good luck with everything

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Your metabolism may be slow. The first thing to really do is watch what your eating. How much your eating is important but really really focus on what your putting into your mouth. You could exercise everyday for an hour and that won't get you anywhere if you have a bad diet. drink a lot of water. Know that bread is not just carbs but when it's absorbed it becomes sugar. Red meats take longer for the body to digest so try to eat chicken..and fish. Maybe instead of eating three solid meals a day if you really want to lose weight juice greens with fruits. I use kale or spinach than add pineapple or mangos to make it sweet. Don't count on brands like naked .. just make your own juices. If you really want to lose it and not necessarily join a program and track points... really try to change your diet you'll see a big improvement just by changing eating habits. Don't deny yourself sweets here and there otherwise you may give up and fail but you will do well if you read ingredients..especially sugar content.. cook your own foods and change your eating habits... then if you have time and want to join the gym... muscles do burn more fat than doing cardio alone. Ive been taking this product called Garcinia Cambogia.. it's helped me but if you decided to take something make sure you really research it... good luck

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VeronicaRoss

I just went to a masseuse who asked me what my exercise regime was. Yoga & speed walking. He said that was usually the answer of his clients with the best body health after 40.

 

What works for me is to keep a food diary when I feel out of control and wonder why I'm gaining weight. There are free ones online but writing down what you eat, how much you eat and calculate the calories will probably be full of surprises. You probably eat more calories than you realize.

 

And you have to move too. Walking your dog for 45 minutes is a great idea! It will help your dog a lot too, they behave better and are so much happier when they get exercise. The '10,000 steps' regime is about an hour of walking each day and that includes your regular life too. Getting a Fit Bit or something like that will help you monitor your movement.

 

My husband prescribes psych drugs and he talks about how they make people gain weight, but he works to convince his patients the mental health and life stability is worth it but it's painful. You don't say you need them now, but the first thing he talks about with his patients is how much sleep they get. Good solid sleep will probably do wonders to stabilize your psychological health too and a Fit Bit and other things like that monitors sleep.

 

Good luck!

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Eternal Sunshine

For long term results, I suggest building muscle mass through resistance training. You can do it at home using your own body weight but better yet go to the gym. Google 5×5 although you may want to start with something gentler. If you keep at it, you will slowly speed up your metabolism and change your body shape. For short term, diet - try decreasing your portions by one third and cardio, google interval training.

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You definitely need to get more active. Walking would be an easy, cheap option too especially now we have the lighter evenings. Once or twice a week is just not enough. Get out more and even a slow walk is better than nothing at all - over time you can build up your speed and distance.

 

As for diet - you do have to get on top of that. I don't know about Slimming World (but I know people who have lost weight through it) but Weight Watchers also works if you put your mind to it - they do have the diet where you have to track everything but they also have one they call healthy and filling. You have plenty of food to choose from and it is all about sensible portion control - maybe that could work for you.

 

As for speed of weight loss, you are far better off losing around 1-2 pounds a week. Slow and steady helps you to learn new eating habits and means you are eating enough to be healthy and active.

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amaysngrace

Weight on a scale doesn't mean much. Muscle weighs more than fat so two people of the same weight will look completely different if one is in shape and the other one isn't.

 

A muscular person will also burn more calories than a fat one, even while resting.

 

You need to convert your fat into muscle. Then you'll be able to eat cake and have no worries like your BF.

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I had to run the 14.5 stone through a converter, cause I have no idea what it means. So... 88kg/190lbs and 5'6"?

 

At this rate, I think you need to make your first priority becoming more healthy, not dropping weight ASAP for aesthetics. Work on becoming more active and eat reasonably (get a reliable BMR calculator up and figure out how many calories you need on a daily basis, then cut the recommended amount for slow, sustainable weight loss - usually 1-2 lbs a week). It will take a lot of time and determination, but works much better than fad diets or excessively low calories in the long run, because those diets cause you to lose muscle and slow your metabolism.

 

I mean, losing weight IS hard. That's the cold hard truth. 1 kg is ~ 8000 calories. That's a LOT! So you have to see it as a long-term goal, and not lose motivation when you don't see results immediately. Not to mention that water weight or female bloating accounts for a lot of variation on the scale, so sometimes you'd go weeks without losing even if you were doing everything perfectly.

 

As for your bf eating what he likes and not gaining weight... yeah, that's pretty much a biological difference between men and women. The average man does have a much higher resting BMR than the average woman, assuming equal activity and fitness levels. No way around that. However, you can make the best of what you do have, by being more active and doing some research about calorie vs nutritional values of food.

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I had to run the 14.5 stone through a converter, cause I have no idea what it means. So... 88kg/190lbs and 5'6"?

 

She's 5'8".

And 14.5 stone is 203 pounds, which is 92kg, I think.

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Exercise is one part of losing weight. Nutrition plays the biggest role in losing weight and being healthy. Have you looked into juicing?

 

It helped me.

 

Search for the movie "fat sick and nearly dead" and go watch it!

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I mean, losing weight IS hard. That's the cold hard truth.

Yes, folks, it's even hard for celebrities and thinner people. We all have to do the same thing to achieve our goals.

 

That's why I start dieting when my weight creeps up five pounds. First off, I can't afford to buy new clothes, and second, I won't have to suffer for as long as I would if I gained 25 lbs.

 

But even harder than losing the weight is maintaining that weight loss. That is where most people fail and regain -- they go back to their old habits. Yes, eating too much is a bad habit, not a disease. If you comfort eat for stress, learn better ways of coping or get rid of the source of the stress.

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passion_flower

Sorry I forgot the majority of you on here are American. I was going to join slimming world but found out weight watchers had a half price deal so I went with them.

 

I find it hard to build up the motivation to go for walks unless it's somewhere I haven't been or I've got someone with me. My dad walks the dog most days so she doesn't go without walks. I am keen to start cycling though, when I get paid next week I will try and get my bike fixed as I prefer 30 minutes cycling to 45 minutes walking.

 

Exercise is one part of losing weight. Nutrition plays the biggest role in losing weight and being healthy. Have you looked into juicing?

 

It helped me.

 

Search for the movie "fat sick and nearly dead" and go watch it!

 

I'll look into it. Sounds a bit like super size me that film.

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Smilecharmer

A big hug for you, OP, as I can imagine this is so hard for you. I am extremely active, like I love doing stuff but I hate gyms so I just walk a lot, put on my tennis shoes and listen to music or books I download. Anything I can do, I don't hire anyone else for or let my my husband do it. I work around my house all the time because I like to take care of my stuff but also because it is more fun for me to clean than to exercise. Hand wash your car every weekend or take up some sport you like. I play tennis and love yoga so I feel like if I am active it keeps my weight steady regardless of baking or spooking bog meals. My husband is tall and big, well muscled and toned so seeing all the women looking him up and down and trying to get his attention makes me work pretty hard on maintaining my short frame.

Up the exercise and control the portions, do stuff that makes you happy and make sure you aren't doing any emotional eating at night or when you feel vulnerable. I hope you figure this out because your health is very important.

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deathandtaxes

Like Elswyth says, you MUST find out your Basal Metabolic Rate. I like this one: Calorie Calculator - Daily Caloric Needs I have used it to much success over the years. The BMR is what your body needs to just exist. That's you not doing ANYTHING at all. It estimates an amount when you ask it for little or no exercise, which is where you should start.

 

 

Weight loss isn't fast. It's hard. It sucks. You have to think of it as a lifestyle change, not as a diet. Eating a little better, to push your caloric intake below maintenance plus some additional expenditures through exercise will go a long ways.

 

 

Once you know what your body needs calorie-wise, you have to educate yourself on what you're putting into your body. Unless you weigh your food, most people are absolutely horrid at estimating what they eat. They always lowball the amount of calories they think they're eating. There are foods out there that are quite calorie dense and you will be surprised at how little it takes before it adds up.

 

 

I'm not just talking ****. I used to be over 100 lbs heavier at my highest weight, almost ten years ago. I took it off slowly, in stages. I would lose a bit. Maintain. Lose more. Maintain. And sometimes months would elapse between maintaining and losing again. And honestly, I like eating a lot healthier.

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Most people i know i have lost weight by cutting their intake. Like giving up smoking or booze. Takes willpower but makes your wallet bigger.

 

Don`t watch little Britian but i am sure you have.

 

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passion_flower

Thanks all, I will take this into account. According to the calculator I need to eat 1600 calories for extreme fat loss with no exercise which seems manageable so hopefully if I start cycling aswell I should get even better results. Would walk the dog with dad but she's too hyper when I go aswell.

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Passion

 

I suspect I am probably not the only one who is now getting a little frustrated with you. Suggestions are being made to you, some even based on what you say you like doing such as my one about walking with your dad yet you keep finding excuses for not doing them.

 

If you want to lose weight, there is no easy solution. You need to commit yourself to it, take it seriously and make the effort. Don't put it off until next week, next month, next year....

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passion_flower
Passion

 

I suspect I am probably not the only one who is now getting a little frustrated with you. Suggestions are being made to you, some even based on what you say you like doing such as my one about walking with your dad yet you keep finding excuses for not doing them.

 

If you want to lose weight, there is no easy solution. You need to commit yourself to it, take it seriously and make the effort. Don't put it off until next week, next month, next year....

 

I know it sounds like I am making an excuse but I am trying to find alternatives here. My dog genuinely is quite a high maintenance dog and dad is the one who can control her best, I know I can go for walks without her but I'd rather cycle when on my own as I am less anxious and enjoy it more. I got paid today so will look into getting my bike fixed over the weekend.

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There is no substitute for physical activity. Use it or lose it. You are young now, but if you don't start moving now, you may not be able to in your 49s or 50s. Do your future self a favor and instill active habits now.

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Plus as you get older, it gets harder to keep the weight off. Get into a healthy life style now and it will set you up right as you age.

 

In my 20s, I was overweight and unfit. Now I am cough cough (not far off the age xxoo mentioned) and my weight is healthy and under control and I am far fitter than many my age - and fitter than many 20+ years younger than me.

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