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How do you honestly feel about over weight people


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Blue Phoenix

How do you feel about extreamly over weight people?? I know this threads been done already sorry. But I'm wondering about how people in genral preceve obease people. I'm not talking about the ones that want to lose 10 pounds or so I'm talking about people over 250 and up. Do you feel sorry for them? are you disgusted when you look at them? Would you have you ever dated one just the genral opinion. And also why is it that it seams to be genraly more exceptable for men to be over weight then women. Also have you ever openly been nasty to some one who was over weight teaseing taunts so on??

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I have never teased a person about weight. I am thin myself... I have made rude comments about a nasty fat pop tart snatcher I know.... but if she was nice her food consumption would not be a factor.

 

She is mean..... so fat, thin, tall, short.... I am sure I would have included some of her physical attributes in descriptive comments about her.

 

When I see a stranger that is obese I think it's sad. Sad that they have or will face health problems, sad that their family is most likely effected by their weight. Sad that they are missing out on activities.

 

I won't go back into the debate of health care and financial burden of obesity on society in general. There are real stats out there, real reports that back up my feelings on this..... but a previous thread got deleted on this topic.

 

Funny you can talk about how nasty smokers are, how bad alcholics are...... but don't ever have a real conversation in public about fat people. It is a health matter, not just about looks. It is also a mental health matter.

 

obesity a disease or lifestyle choice?

 

I have never dated any person that was probably over 10LB of ideal body weight. I like active partners that are able to enjoy physical activities with me.

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whichwayisup
obesity a disease or lifestyle choice?

 

It's probably abit of both.

 

I don't discriminate against anyone, colour, race, height, fat, skinny, doesn't make a difference to me - And I'm not just saying this, I truely mean it.

 

My bestfriend used to be very large, so I've also seen firsthand how she got treated in school, how some people were just cruel to her because of her weight issues without getting to know her.

 

A family who lives on my street is obeise. Nice family, I enjoy talking to them and being neighbourly.

 

It's just a shame that they continue to order in pizza afew nights a week, do alot of take out food and don't get out much. Their kids are all quite large too.

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Blue Phoenix

--"When I see a stranger that is obese I think it's sad"-- 1st off I wanna thank you for your honest replys. Now I would like to add something to this conversation from a 1st hand view point. I myself am what they would call morbidly obese I stand at 5ft5 and was well over 250 last time I checked. How ever I am active I can walk for miles and do so almost every day. I am happy I like myself just as I am matter of fact I'm not sure I would want to lose weight even if I had the chance. Ive always been larger ever since I was a child I suffered the taunts and teaseing back then and still do at times to this day and im now 29. I think alot of the over pushing about larger people being massivly unhealthry is helped along largely by docs who are inflateing the subject to help the push for collective weight loss. And in turn helping to push the multimillion dollar industry along at a nice pace hence lineing there own pockets a bit more as they go. I'm sure a few of you will now go and quote stuff you find on line to help point out the risks of being over weight. And yes I do agree there are elevated risks but not every over weight person is going to drop dead because of it. --"I won't go back into the debate of health care and financial burden of obesity on society in general"-- Im not realy 100% sure how you mean burden on health care what with private heath coverage and all I can only asume your talking about those on wealfare maybe??. Realy if you think about it tho you could also compare other life style choises as far as being likewise unhealthy just for instance here. Im pretty sure I saw some weres that gay people have a greater chance of getting / spreading STDs isent that unhealthey?? Would you then tell them its a burden on sociaty for them to be gay?? But I realy wasent trying to debate the polliticks of obesity here rather the human side of it. And trying to grasp why some people seam to think of us as less then human in some way. I am human I have the same feelings emoshions fears and hopes as thin people why do people look down on me just because I look diffrent from what sociaity says is beauity or the right way to look. Why is it in this suposidly advanced world we live in its still ok and baseickly accepted for people to bash or put down over weight people?? Just a thought next time you see a larger person say hello and treat them like you would any one else you might just be surprised at how nice and normal they realy are.. Also as a after thought I don't agree that all over weight people are that way because they over eat its just not true. Its a blanket statement I eat healthey and in moderation and I am still over weight. But I guess thats just another mith about us that is in fashion at the moment. Much like the we are all dirty smelly people I am not I shower more then most thin people I know and spend a good deal of money on personal grooming products lol..

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People that tease fat people are not nice... just like people that tease gay people are not nice..... or people of different races.

 

But if you are fat you are fat. If you are black you are black..... people are going to see that.

 

No matter how hard you try to say it does not matter or should not -it will.

 

I know of two obese people...... one hops into the store provided scooters when shopping. Always has a soda in her hand.

 

The other heavy probably 250ish can get around fine..... but things like hiking, horseback riding, even fitting into the seat on a rollercoaster makes life more difficult for him...... he really is a big guy...... not even fat looking.

 

So my experience is that being over weight it does effect activity and oppurtunity.

 

If you are fat and happy that is great....... but you cannot expect people not to notice that you are fat. They should not taunt/tease you.....but they will see it, just like they see the color of your skin or eyes.

 

I have people tell me I am too skinny. And yes I have been teased about it often.... I have finally gained 7 lb.... but it all went to the boobs! :lmao: so now I get teased about my boobs...... and I will lose weight rapidly in the warm months and get teased all summer about how the wind will blow me away...... and for a skinny chick I sure am strong.... hell my H is teased all the time ...... fat people call him Stick. Fat people pick on skinny people.

 

I have to disagree.... time and time again it has been proven that being over weight is not healthy..... nor is smoking. Driving can also be dangerous.... but comparing apples to oranges (different species - right lindya?)

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I'm fairly thin - 115lbs or so at 5'9". But I've never been teased about it by overweight people or otherwise.

 

As for overweight people, I feel really sad. I can't believe it's ever a choice. At the very least I think it's a psychological condition and often times it's due to an undiagnosed underactive thyroid. My mother went from a size 10 (size 8 in US) to a size 18 due to her thyroid packing up. She went undiagnosed for 10 years before she was put on thyroxin. It been really, really tough for her.

 

Also, lets not forget the people that have basically been overfed and under exercised as children and thus have a. not learnt about diet and nutrition and b. have probably been victimised all their lives and so seek solace in eating.

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You know, the thing that gets me is that for me it really isn't about appearance. When I see a really obese person, like so big that he or she has to use an electric scooter to get around, I feel sorry for them because they are missing out on life. That is not living...that's just existing.

 

It's the same for super skinny people who are that way because of eating disorders. I do find it very unattractive for people to be bone thin, but my real sorrow is that they are not enjoying their lives.

 

I used to be 250 pounds, but I've lost almost 80 pounds over the past three years or so. I can honestly tell you that my life is ten times more enjoyable now. I'm not so self-conscious about doing things I love, like swimming or going to the beach. I'm not as self-conscious meeting new people and I'm more confident at my job.

 

I can enjoy getting out and walking my dog without having painful joints and shin splints. My life is just a whole lot better having lost weight, not only because I look better, but just because I FEEL so much better.

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I grew up in the fat midwestern US, so it's never been a shock to see someone who is obese. I was actually shocked when I moved to Northern California and hardly ever saw anyone who was really fat.

 

Fat people do get picked on, from grade school through high school and their whole lives. I do think there's a tendency for society to look down on fat people, as though they can't control themselves and are unappealing to look at. I really don't know that anything is going to change those perspectives, unless perhaps, there is someone in their lives they are close to who they can see is a lovely person and does actually try hard to lose weight and be healthy.

 

One of my friends lost quite a bit of weight on the Atkins plan, and she admits that she does feel a lot happier and more at peace now being at closer to a normal weight. She's very outgoing and never let her weight get in the way in social situations, but she says she has less anxiety now - she's not constantly thinking about fat and weight and how others perceive her. Her physical weight loss help take a lot of worry and stress off her mind and that made more difference to her life than the actual pounds lost.

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I had really poor eating habits all through middle and high school, some of it I attribute to depression, some of it just from that I was lazy and liked to eat! Couple that with tearing a ligament in my sophomore year of high school that took me permanently out of cheerleading and most other sports, and my weight just ballooned. I also went through another bad bout of depression when I first moved away for college, and I solved my problems by eating.

 

Another thing that finally helped me LOSE weight was learning how to set smaller goals for myself. I never learned at a young age how to "improve" my fitness by starting small and working up. We just got made fun of because we couldn't run a mile in the specified time or do enough pull ups in front of our class mates. Didn't exactly encourage a love of healthy activity!

 

Stace, can I ask what the reason was for your weight gain?
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sunshinegirl

My first reaction is usually pity or sorrow - like others who have posted - that the person is missing out on so many activities.

 

I have a heightened sense of that lately; for the past 9 months or so I've taken up yoga and rock climbing, which connects me with my body in ways I've not really experienced in other sports. It actually brings me joy to roll out the yoga mat or get the chalk out for bouldering, so again it makes me sad to see people who because of weight are most likely unable to experience similar things.

 

I sometimes also wonder how happy that person is. When I carried more weight on my frame (40 pounds more than I do today), I felt sluggish and actually depressed. Lots of factors in play there, not just weight, but I was nowhere near as happy as I am today as a relatively fit, active person.

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Hey BluePhoenix, great posts and thankyou for your honesty.

 

My dad is a big guy... he has a physically active job, and is solid but overweight. He loves good food.

 

unfortunately I have inherited his love of food, and developed a taste for good wine, so i have to work to keep my figure (65kg, 5'8").

 

But I LOVE healthy food.. i HATE fast food. I love cooking. I love chocolate. And I enjoy (ish) exercising.. so its OK for now.

 

Really obese people worry me, I feel sad for them, because I realise life can be harder for them.

However with the amount of "healthy diet" & "exercise more" propaganda that is saturating the media, it amazes me that there are still people out there who eat takeaways every day.

If, like you BP, people are still exercising, and relatively healthy- no problem.

But i hate seeing really overweight unhappy children with parents who are oblivious to how miserable and unhealthy their children are.

 

I think for me its not about SIZE... its about lifestyle.

In my job i have to analyse diet often. People lie about it all the time. they say "Oh SB, why do Ihave so many holes inmy teeth, why are my gums disgusting?" " ummm because you drink 5 cans of cola a day, smoke 20fags and eat crap".

 

I have nooo problem with healthy large people.

Its the people who continue to make unhealthy lifestyle choices and expect the state to sort out the ailments that make me a little annoyed.

(and that category includes skinny people, cos alot of thin people are very unhealthy too ie heavy smokers, etc)

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Blue Phoenix

No prob sb129 I wanted to see how people whould react to a actual obese persons point of view about it. --"My first reaction is usually pity or sorrow"-- This is the exact kind of mind set that I hope some day can be changed. You don't need to feel pitty for us were not lepors or canser pashents were larger people. Do you feel pitty for black people or gay people or any other minority chances are no. And thats because they have gained publick respect over the years something witch over weight people have yet to do sadly. Im not missing out on anything I walk I ride a bike I go out I had even partisipated in group sports when I was younger. And yes I did all this as a over weight person I've dated had normal relashionships was even close to marrage once. For the most part were no diffrent then any one else other then the way we are looked at and excepted in sociaity. I hear alot of encouragemnt basickly to lose the weight but I ask you all this why should we have to lose the weight so we can be excepted beter by every one?? Being over weight is not always unhealthey but what is unhealthey is how people are not willing to except it just like any other minority larger people should be treated like any one else. Now I know your going to say well if your bigger you have to except that people will treat you this way umm why?? did other races who were disrimnated agenst except it no they dident and the collective mind set as a hole changed about them as a result..No dont feel pitty for me im a happy well adjusted person whos more comfey in my body then most skinney people feel sad for sociaity in genral and the way its still excepted to treat us!!

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Also have you ever openly been nasty to some one who was over weight teaseing taunts so on??

Not really openly nasty but I generally won't talk with them. Many of these obese people have such low self-esteem that they use their body language to keep people away. Like if I had to ask a question and there was only a skinny person or obese person around, i'd probably ask the skinny person.

 

The other day I was at the library on a computer and this guy who must have weighed 350lb was siting next to me. He STUNK like pooh. It was gross. He was wearing crappy clothes and jeans that looked like they were 15 yrs old. I mean he stunk to all high heaven. I was gagging. After 15 minutes I had to get up and leave. Phew!

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Blue Phoenix

--"Not really openly nasty but I generally won't talk with them"-- Your replying to a thread started by a obese person so why not talk to them in real life? I agree some times we can be a bit stand offish but thats usualy because of how people have treated us thu out our lives. I personaly hesitate a tiney bit but thats only because you never know if there going to talk normal to you or toss insults at random. Next time talk to them you might be surprised at how human they realy are --"He STUNK like pooh. It was gross. He was wearing crappy clothes and jeans that looked like they were 15 yrs old. I mean he stunk to all high heaven. I was gagging"-- Its people like that who give as all a bad name theres no reason to let your self get this way skinney or fat just no reason but in return I've been around lots of stinkey @ss skinney people as well but I think when its a over weight person its genraly easer to clump as all togher like that..

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but in return I've been around lots of stinkey @ss skinney people as well ..

so have I ...but to me it seems like grossly obese people have more hygiene problems, in general. Not to say that all obese people stink but on avg they do stink more than skinny people.

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People who eat a lot of garlic and onions smell pretty pungent. Skinny or fat. Unless they use breath mints.

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How do you feel about extreamly over weight people??

You mean fat people? Obese people? Supersize people? I think they rule, because they are bigger than me. I'm not stupid, despite appearances.

 

Anyway, I am too busy getting steamed over bad spellars.

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To give a serious response, I have known and loved many fat people. I think overweight people can look attractive, depending on how they carry themselves.

 

I think very obese people have a harder time pulling it off.

 

But in general, people come in all shapes and sizes and that can be a good thing, as long as the person is comfortable in his/her skin.

 

People have referred to the actor Kevin James before as an example of a typical "fat guy", and I think he is adorable.

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To give a serious response, I have known and loved many fat people.

Does it feel "bouncy?"

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bluetuesday
People who eat a lot of garlic and onions smell pretty pungent.

 

well that's the french taken care of. did you know that the french use less deodorant and change their underwear less frequently than people in any other european country? i read this somewhere. somewhere serious too. i think it was heat magazine.

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People have referred to the actor Kevin James before as an example of a typical "fat guy", and I think he is adorable.

he wouldn't be that "adorable" if he packed on another 100 lbs...

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How do you feel about extreamly over weight people?? I know this threads been done already sorry. But I'm wondering about how people in genral preceve obease people. I'm not talking about the ones that want to lose 10 pounds or so I'm talking about people over 250 and up. Do you feel sorry for them? are you disgusted when you look at them? Would you have you ever dated one just the genral opinion. And also why is it that it seams to be genraly more exceptable for men to be over weight then women. Also have you ever openly been nasty to some one who was over weight teaseing taunts so on??

 

Nothing out of the normal. I mean, they are human like you and me.

 

If they are happy with who they are, then I have no reason to feel sorry for them, or if they are depressed about their weight and they don't even try to lose the weight, then no I do not feel sorry for them as well.

 

I am not disgusted, but I am generally not attracted to someone who doesn't take care of themselves in terms of healthy eating and a healthy lifestyle.

 

I would date one, but only if I found them attractive and they are attempting to take care of themselves in a healthy manner.

 

I have no idea why its more acceptable for a man to be overweight and not a woman. It sure does seem like that, but Kristie Alley got away with it, so maybe there is hope afterall.

 

I have never insulted anyone because of their weight.

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whichwayisup
I have no idea why its more acceptable for a man to be overweight and not a woman

 

I know, I don't get that either. It's like on TV as well - Older and larger men don't seem to have any problems staying on air or stations getting complaints...But, put a larger and older woman on air, people write or call in to complain that she should not be on camera.

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