sv1123 Posted March 16, 2016 Share Posted March 16, 2016 I'm an abuse survivor who is seeing a therapist etc...and slowly dipping my feet back into the world of dating. I am genuinely intrigued to find out what others think self-respect is and how that looks, especially in the romantic realm, from first meeting to commitment etc... I think I am also interested in learning how people balance having their personal boundaries while still remaining compassionate and forgiving...I struggle with this one. The, in essence, putting up boundaries and not rigid walls, knowing when to give a second change and not etc... Thought it was a useful question to post in this forum given I'm sure many of us abuse survivors could benefit from conversations about it! Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted March 16, 2016 Share Posted March 16, 2016 I like what my daughter did. She always gave a guy a second chance (at disrespecting her). But never a third. One guy made a date with her, but never showed up. Turns out he fell asleep. He asked for a second chance, she said yes. Guess what? He took another nap and didn't bother to set an alarm on his phone so he would wake up in time. In other words, SHE wasn't important enough to him to set the alarm. So when he called and 'explained' again, and asked for another chance, she just said 'it looks like I'm not that much of a priority to you, so let's just stay friends.' And she turned him down. They're still friends to this day, but she respected herself enough not to lower HER standards just to have a date. Does that help? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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