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is my mother trying to seduce me or am i reading too much into it


umeshkuyad

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It was this way with me; I am from India and I am a Hindu [igive you this info as I want all to have a clear understanding of my position] mymother was very strict with me since childhood but doting towards my elderbrother. Since I got to 15 years of age her behaviour suddenly changed towardsme. I don’t know what the reasons could be but I guess one on them is that myelder brother is a good for nothing spendthrift.

 

My father works in the BSF andis out station for most of the year. It was also during this time that Istarted earning a bit. Whatever the reasons her behaviour changed drastically!It started with smiles & nice talk and gradually shifted to frequentkisses, hugs and sometimes massages. All this I never got during my childhoodso I was taken aback but then I saw that her affection was a bit different thana mom son relationship entails.

 

Like I notice she lip kisses me often thesedays instead of pecks on my cheeks, also during massages she tries to, how do Isay do more than just massage, like if she is massaging my belly her handstravel a bit too low for my comfort or when she is massaging my leg her handfondle my inner things right up to my lions! Like a couple of days ago she cameto massage me in a bra and petticoat, you can imagine the situation as I was inmy underwear only [she insists on it during massages]. She also makes memassage her sometimes or calls me to the bathroom to apply soap to her back. Allthese were quite ok for I live in India where mother and son are supposed to beintimately close. In my creed Hinduism mothers command is considered more piousthan even deities and must be followed at all costs.

 

Hence I carried on but oflate even I am uneasy as I sometimes get the hots for her due to her conduct.Like few days back she was talking about my GF and subtly turned the topictowards my sex life. I have to admit I was aroused by her talk and expressions,don’t know why I talked in such detail with her about my sex life, evendescribing my sex acts with my GF to her! I am myself very surprised on my act.She ended by hinting “if you need any advice or otherwise need any help in thismatter I can help you after all I am more experienced in this matter” She smiled slyly and said I need morepractice and maybe she can help! I was dumbfounded and she walked away givingme a smile.

 

Please help me am I reading too much into this or is theresomething wrong?

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Freud would have a field day with this.

 

 

I am not Indian, but I am fairly sure incestous relationships are frowned upon in your culture too. Try to back off with the massages etc. and focus your attention on your GF.

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I think she's being motherly /maternal not sexual. tell her you would prefer she be dressed. Or decline the massage all together.

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Don this is the one of the rare times i disagree with you.

 

This does not sound normal OP. A rub down after a football game or a Cricket match is one thing but down to the underwear and your inner thighs.......And saying mummy knows a few things.....

 

I would pack my things OP. Tell her it is completely wrong. Blimey!

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You need to create some boundaries and quit letting her massage you and kiss you on the mouth. And don't talk about your sex life with her!!!

 

It sounds to me like she may be really lonely. You should encourage her to go date.

 

This is NOT normal.

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the reason I am not leaping on the incest / seduction bandwagon is two fold:

 

 

1). the OP is only slightly older than 15 from what I derived from the post

 

 

2). he said that most of her behavior is the cultural norm.

Allthese were quite ok for I live in India where mother and son are supposed to beintimately close. In my creed Hinduism mothers command is considered more piousthan even deities and must be followed at all costs.

 

[My block quote button is not working correctly but the above is the reason I think there is a cultural disparity that makes this more OK then it looks to Western eyes, where it seems awfully creepy]

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Freud would have a field day with this.

 

 

I am not Indian, but I am fairly sure incestous relationships are frowned upon in your culture too. Try to back off with the massages etc. and focus your attention on your GF.

to be frank the term 'incest' doesn't bear as much consideration in hinduism as in western creeds, there are innumerable instances on incest in hindu texts. however my problem is how do i stop all these without being too 'un-indian'

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I think she's being motherly /maternal not sexual. tell her you would prefer she be dressed. Or decline the massage all together.

already told her that a couple of times, no effet on that issue. only change was she discards some morre cloths

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Don this is the one of the rare times i disagree with you.

 

This does not sound normal OP. A rub down after a football game or a Cricket match is one thing but down to the underwear and your inner thighs.......And saying mummy knows a few things.....

 

I would pack my things OP. Tell her it is completely wrong. Blimey!

i would tell her that the next time for sure, lets hope all turns well

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Sounds like the opening lines of some lousy desi porn to me.

from your post i gather you are a hindu indian too. just thepoint i want to state. i just can't discuss this with a fellow hindu, it will be just discarded i will have to be silen submissive son no matter what

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You need to create some boundaries and quit letting her massage you and kiss you on the mouth. And don't talk about your sex life with her!!!

 

It sounds to me like she may be really lonely. You should encourage her to go date.

 

This is NOT normal.

lonly she is not, on the other hand she has a bit too many male friends for the comfort of me [or my elder bro for that matter]. my problem concerns only her behaviour with me

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the reason I am not leaping on the incest / seduction bandwagon is two fold:

 

 

1). the OP is only slightly older than 15 from what I derived from the post

 

 

2). he said that most of her behavior is the cultural norm.

Allthese were quite ok for I live in India where mother and son are supposed to beintimately close. In my creed Hinduism mothers command is considered more piousthan even deities and must be followed at all costs.

 

[My block quote button is not working correctly but the above is the reason I think there is a cultural disparity that makes this more OK then it looks to Western eyes, where it seems awfully creepy]

very correct, and thats my point,i don't know how to react, since its ok from a hindu indian point of view but 'creepy' from a western viewpoint. i was educated in an english school, had i been to a vernacular medium school this ll would have been ok but now it seems odd

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My mother used to make me give her intimate massages when she was single and I have to say, it creeped me the hell out. And I'm pretty sure those emotions wouldn't have been any different if I had been educated in India. No wonder there's so much rape and angst toward women if that's the norm over there.

 

I'm surprised you managed to find yourself turned on by that. You're more of a man than I am. Or your moms just hotter, one or the other.

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I think she's a total creep. As he said, she didn't do this before, only now he's becoming a man. You need to get out of that house as soon as you can. In the meantime, you need to look your mother right in the eye and tell her "Stop touching and kissing me or I'm telling someone about it." She will try to make motherly excuses. Just walk off and tell her it stops today or you will tell. And then no idea what laws are there, but if she keeps it up, you could ask a priest about it or a school teacher or counselor and see who you report in case you have to report.

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Do you want to have sex with your mother?

 

Yes, was wondering too if he was seeking our permission.

 

Pretty disturbing this thread... Sorry if that makes me very Western.

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From what I understand full blown sex is rare but lonely women treating their kids like a surrogate spouse is more common that it should be. =/ Including stuff like flirting and lingering kisses. One of the things that isn't talked about as much as it should be.

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EverLastluv

WOW

I must say my culture is Hindu. but not from India. How ever I have delt with a few things that my fiance who is a (hindu) mom treats him so "sweet" more better than I do. He share his money with her everytime he gets pay. I told him a few time that his mother needs to stop acting like his wife, the only thing she CAN'T do is F*** you!! lol

 

From what i gather from your post your mother wants to have sex with you!!!! It is the truth. I heard lots of stories that in the indian culture the father usually sleep with the daughter first before they marry them off OMGGGGGGGG now its the mother wants to be with their son???? insane **** !!!! Please do the right thing, I know you love your mother but you know whats right from wrong. Try your best to explain that you have a gf now and you are a grown guy not a little boy. Tell her the truth.... it feels like she is trying to turn you on by doing thosethings. Tell her to STOP. God bless you.

Edited by EverLastluv
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1). the OP is only slightly older than 15 from what I derived from the post

 

I'll never forget the story told by my grandmother (may God bless her soul):

 

 

Back in the ol' days, there wasn't a proper bathroom. The family took weekly baths on Saturday night (so they'd be clean for Sunday at church) after the traditional Saturday beans and toast meal.

 

 

Everyone got bathed in the same water in a big tin tub that was placed in front of the wood stove in the kitchen.

 

 

The cleanest went first (i.e. the kids). Well, she had continued to wash my uncle (her son), but when she was washing his back when he was about 14 or 15, she said his "horsey" popped out of the water ...

 

 

That was when she stopped washing him!

 

 

OP, don't wash your mom's back, don't massage her, don't let her massage you, don't kiss her on the lips, don't tell her about your sex life, and just generally make yourself scarce!

 

 

If she put "the moves" on you, then ask her, "When's dad home? It seems like you could use some company." And walk off. Don't discuss.

 

 

She should get the message and back off.

 

 

So sorry she has boundary issues and that you have to deal with the confusion.

Edited by ja123
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I lived and worked with a Hindu family for 2 years.

I can honestly say hand on heart that the situation described here is completely against the norm. Women occupy a peculiar position in Hinduism; they are revered and respected, especially in the Embodiments of Goddesses; but (particularly) currently, they do not enjoy a happy or equal existence.

This woman is seizing the opportunity in her husband's absence to exploit her solitude with her son. It is misguided, wrong, and frankly appalling behaviour.

While it is true that sons are very much the preferred gender, and there is massive investment in their upbringing and education, they are also expected to respect, care for and tend, financially, to their elderly parents, with gratitude and reverence.

Nowhere, anywhere, is it expected, or usual, or required, that a mother and son enter into what borders on an incestuous relationship.

If this boy's father were aware of this situation (always making the assumption that it is true, and not some foolish person's fantasy and trolling) then he would go ballistic, admonish the son - but the wife would and could very well be in for a sound beating.

 

seriously.

 

For further info:

 

Children in Hinduism

 

See also other links at foot of page.

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I lived and worked with a Hindu family for 2 years.

I can honestly say hand on heart that the situation described here is completely against the norm. Women occupy a peculiar position in Hinduism; they are revered and respected, especially in the Embodiments of Goddesses; but (particularly) currently, they do not enjoy a happy or equal existence.

This woman is seizing the opportunity in her husband's absence to exploit her solitude with her son. It is misguided, wrong, and frankly appalling behaviour.

While it is true that sons are very much the preferred gender, and there is massive investment in their upbringing and education, they are also expected to respect, care for and tend, financially, to their elderly parents, with gratitude and reverence.

Nowhere, anywhere, is it expected, or usual, or required, that a mother and son enter into what borders on an incestuous relationship.

If this boy's father were aware of this situation (always making the assumption that it is true, and not some foolish person's fantasy and trolling) then he would go ballistic, admonish the son - but the wife would and could very well be in for a sound beating.

 

seriously.

 

For further info:

 

Children in Hinduism

 

See also other links at foot of page.

You sure they weren't just waiting until your back was turned to start making out?

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