jesha Posted March 1, 2014 Share Posted March 1, 2014 My good friend has been dating a guy for about five months now. She left her ex boyfriend for him and was totally smitten with him. She sees that he doesn't know how to deal with problems without violence, and I see a lot of signs that he could be a potential abuser in the future. She realizes this also, but doesn't want to break up with him because she's so in love with him. How do I express my concern for her? Do I say anything at all? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 1, 2014 Share Posted March 1, 2014 Talk to her but be gentle & supportive. Tell her you have concerns. Ask her if she's noticed the behaviors. Ask if she is safe. Make sure she knows that no matter what you will be there if she needs you. Do not be judgmental or you may chase her away & leave her isolated when she later needs you. Keep your eyes open for her but avoid direct attacks against him. Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted March 4, 2014 Share Posted March 4, 2014 I don't think you can do much about this, considering she is in love ... which is an incredible state of hypnosis. Even if you point out his problems, i doubt she will ever believe that he will turn on her. So beyond bringing them to some level of focus without assigning blame, you won't be able to separate them. PS: Is your friend someone with high self-esteem, or low self-esteem ? Does she have a history going for bad boys ? If you could classify her ex's, how would describe them in few words [character is interesting but also life prospects]. How old is your friend ? Link to post Share on other sites
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