a4a Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 Wondering what the hell is wrong with women, that just are so damn catty with other women? You would think that women would see other women as a support system not the enemy. Have you dealt with this in your own life? What do you think causes this? Are you a catty woman yourself? (fess up ) If so why are you? a4a Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 You would think that women would see other women as a support system not the enemy. You'd also think that people would settle their differences without wars and fighting, be kind to strangers and stop polluting the environment What do you think causes this? Women compete. Are you a catty woman yourself? (fess up ) We could "out" a few of them Link to post Share on other sites
slubberdegullion Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 Have you dealt with this in your own life? What do you think causes this? I've seen it, off and on, all the time. RR has it right about his "women compete" statement. Men compete too, but men have more of a tendency to compartmentalize their lives. So, if I'm competing for, say, a contract against someone else, that doesn't make the other party my enemy. The competition has its place, but it doesn't affect other parts of the relationship. There's also an internal stress that tends to happen with women that arises because of the persona they like to show to the world and the real person. Nowhere does this stress make itself more apparent than in a babble of women competing for attention, career advancement, a partner, or who sells the most Avon or whatever. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 Have you dealt with this in your own life? What do you think causes this? Usually it is the good looking females who hate other women and have plenty of male "friends". Women hate competition and are afraid that good loking females will "steal" their men.... Have you ever been somewhere where there are a lot of women a young attractive slender woman walks in the door?? the other women look at her with disdain and jelousy. That is another reason why women of a certain type hang out together. usuaully the good looking ones hang with each other and then the fat and ugly ones hang together and the nerdy smart ones hang together. in all actuality, A4A, it is the females of the species that one needs to watch out for, not the males. Link to post Share on other sites
Hot Coco Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 Lots of good points made here. Men can compartmentalize...very true. I have a good lawyer friend. He tells me that he can do battle in the court room against the other lawyer and then when it's over, shake hands and go get a beer. Women can't seem to do this. I've really never gotten along with women, a4a. I've always had men friends (gay and straight). Women really are catty and competitive. I have met a few who weren't like that, but their problem (in my eyes) is that everything was always about them. They just wanted someone to listen to them constantly. Never ask about me or my life. Selfish. So my experiences with trying to have women friends has failed miserably. I can only take them in small doses. It's sad. I wish I could have meaninful relationships with women. I was always envious of women who have "Sex and the City" type friendships. But I've given up on that ever happening. I hate to say it, but I agree with Alpha. Men are so much easier to get along with. They're more direct, don't usually have secret agendas, aren't catty and petty. I love men. I don't really get women. Wish I did. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 I was always envious of women who have "Sex and the City" type friendships. But I've given up on that ever happening. That was a TV show HC and not reality. If it was reality then no one would have watched it. Link to post Share on other sites
Hot Coco Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 But Alpha, the portrayal of the friendships I don't think was fictional. I see women all around me who have groups of friends like this. That part isn't fictional. Oh and off topic for a sec...I had to laugh. People are always apoligizing if they have to agree with you Alpha! Have you noticed that! It's like, please don't bash me but I'm about to agreee with ALPHA! Horrors! Link to post Share on other sites
elijahBailey Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 Some very good points posted above. Men compete for the advancement in career. But women, REALLY, compete for the attention of men. It's pretty common to see women bad-mouth one another because the other one is getting more attention from men. It's not like they can't get their own men. They're doing all this despite the fact that they have their own dicks waiting for them at home. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 But Alpha, the portrayal of the friendships I don't think was fictional. I see women all around me who have groups of friends like this. That part isn't fictional. OK, let see HC: 1) most successful career women don't have the time those 4 did 2) most women over 30 are not into casual sex like those 4 were 3) most women their age have kids already and are married and/or divorced 4) most women cannot afford $450 for one pair of shoes the show was total fiction and there are no such thing as their perfect friendships and perfect world as depicted in the show. Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 But Alpha, the portrayal of the friendships I don't think was fictional. I see women all around me who have groups of friends like this. That part isn't fictional. A real group of 4 women of this type would be unlikely to get on as well, IMO. Too much to fall out over... Link to post Share on other sites
elijahBailey Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 2) most women over 30 are not into casual sex like those 4 were Yer kiddin' me right? Link to post Share on other sites
Hot Coco Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 Look, how the hell do I know...I've never really had meaninful realationships with women but they didn't show them (on the show) always getting along. THey had their fights and disagreements but they worked it out and were always friends. I assumed that's how it really is...but who knows? Like I said frienships with women are a mystery to me. So are there any women out there who have close friendships with other women? Is the Sex and the City portrayal of female friendships fiction? Tell us! I'd really love to know. Link to post Share on other sites
Brittanyjean06 Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 i my self have noticed that about women, honestly some are just plain *itches.....and are jealous........girls do like to compete....i dont,,,,,but when i notice some one trying to ....or being mean....thats when its ON! hahah jk but its not for the attention of other males...ew...... i hate girls sometimes , and i hate it when i see it in my self also:(.....dont get jealous, be nice to everyone and if they are not nice to you than back off and laugh......... Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 THey had their fights and disagreements but they worked it out and were always friends. I assumed that's how it really is...but who knows? It's not. Not with women of that ilk, anyhow - they'd need more "give and take". Seriously, can you imagine a real life Samantha having time for any other woman? Link to post Share on other sites
Author a4a Posted November 21, 2005 Author Share Posted November 21, 2005 I hate to say it, but I agree with Alpha. Men are so much easier to get along with. They're more direct, don't usually have secret agendas, aren't catty and petty. I love men. I don't really get women. Wish I did. Is it because men are more blunt or aggressive with their communication? Women are more passive aggressive? I am talking generalizations of course. I am more of a blunt person.... I get along with chatting with the guys and can get into a debate call each other a**h***s then drink a beer 10 minutes later with them. I don't boo hoo because my female friend neglects to call me on a regular basis....... hell we are both busy..... but would always assist each other to bury the bodies (real friends are always willing to do this no matter what!) even if we don't chat for a month or two. The most dreaded thing for me is the woman "head to toe" scope out when you enter a room....... hell you know she is looking for a pissing match...important to hit the ignore button ASAP when this happens.... be cordial but stay at a distance to preserve the peace. a4a Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 Is it because men are more blunt or aggressive with their communication? YES. In general, we do not mince words. I know I don't. Link to post Share on other sites
Author a4a Posted November 21, 2005 Author Share Posted November 21, 2005 YES. In general, we do not mince words. I know I don't. Do you think if a woman is more blunt and aggressive with communication she is sort of a b*tch? That it is not a wanted female positive quality in a mans POV? I believe most women see blunt women as bitches...... why I do not know...... I do not..... I enjoy the company of blunt women over PA women any day! a4a Link to post Share on other sites
Hot Coco Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 Well, a4a, I think you hit the nail on the head there. Yes, I'm one of those blunt women. We're more like men. I think the communication style of most women is just not my style. I don't relate to it. I think that may be key. I never really thought of that possibly being the issue. Oh and that head to toe scope thing...man, can I relate! I HATE that! And they're so obvious about it too...bitches! (Told you I was blunt!) Good topic, a4a! Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 So are there any women out there who have close friendships with other women? Is the Sex and the City portrayal of female friendships fiction? Tell us! I'd really love to know. why don't u start a new thread on this HC and we'll get some feedback. Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 Do you think if a woman is more blunt and aggressive with communication she is sort of a b*tch? That it is not a wanted female positive quality in a mans POV? I believe most women see blunt women as bitches...... why I do not know...... I do not..... I enjoy the company of blunt women over PA women any day! a4a She may be a b*tch to any man who is also blunt and aggressive. Two hardheads banging up against each other... nah, I don't think that would work out so well! As a blunt and direct guy, I would not be too attracted to someone who is just like me. I like women who are a bit more mellow - definitely NOT *PA* though (which, to me, isn't the opposite of being blunt). B*tchy women may do better with a man who is less blunt however Western society's insistence that men be *in charge* and aggressive FT make those sort of relationships awkward-looking to many people. Link to post Share on other sites
Author a4a Posted November 21, 2005 Author Share Posted November 21, 2005 Well, a4a, I think you hit the nail on the head there. Yes, I'm one of those blunt women. We're more like men. I think the communication style of most women is just not my style. I don't relate to it. I think that may be key. I never really thought of that possibly being the issue. Oh and that head to toe scope thing...man, can I relate! I HATE that! And they're so obvious about it too...bitches! (Told you I was blunt!) Good topic, a4a! I think it is a serious problem one that holds women back from forming tight bonds..... I just wonder where it stems from. Is it that they are taught to be Nellie Olsens? Every time I get a "head to toe scope" I think of Nellie Olsen Funny is you really don't like Nellie but you cannot help but to have sympathy for her... a4a Link to post Share on other sites
Moai Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 In my experience, all women don't compete for men, but the vast majority of them do. Even when they are with someone else. Men compete for women, too, but not the same way. I have noticed this most with women I have no interest in romantically. When one of them sees me with another woman, they get very jealous and catty to each other--but not in front of me. But boy do I hear about it when we are alone! I have two close women friends in particular that hate each other now, and it is all because they are jealous of the time they spend with me. They were casual friends before, but now one keeps trying to get me to drop the other because "she's a bitch" and the one that should be dropped (supposedly) makes passive aggressive comments and bugs me about where I am with her competition. None of my male friends are jealous of each other. Women seem to be best friends with a woman for about three months and then it goes to pot and they hate each other. Also, women don't tease the same way men do. Men can rip on each other in a certain way that actually makes you feel good, and lets you know you're part of the group and loved. When women try to do that, it comes off mean and hurtful. I told a girl friend of mine that, and she freaked out and got defensive. Link to post Share on other sites
Author a4a Posted November 21, 2005 Author Share Posted November 21, 2005 Also, women don't tease the same way men do. Men can rip on each other in a certain way that actually makes you feel good, and lets you know you're part of the group and loved. When women try to do that, it comes off mean and hurtful. I told a girl friend of mine that, and she freaked out and got defensive. AHA! You got it right there! I love rippin on my guy friends and we will shred each other.... of course we don't cross certain lines that are known as serious soft spots. Very few females can joke and tease within a group without getting their nose outta joint over it. Hell if you cannot make fun of your friends why have em?! And nothing is worse than a over sensitive bitchy boy! I love hanging with gay guys because most will shred any person in sight! a4a Link to post Share on other sites
Hot Coco Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 I think it is a serious problem one that holds women back from forming tight bonds..... I just wonder where it stems from. Is it that they are taught to be Nellie Olsens? Every time I get a "head to toe scope" I think of Nellie Olsen Funny is you really don't like Nellie but you cannot help but to have sympathy for her... a4a That was funny! I HATED Nellie! Maybe I'm a a real bitch because I enver really felt sorry for her. I loved when the father used to haul her off physically! I have no sympathy for the Nellies of the world...judgemental bitches! Pheww...that felt so good! Maybe women just can't form tight bonds with each other at all? Is that what some of you are saying? Link to post Share on other sites
Hot Coco Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 AHA! You got it right there! I love rippin on my guy friends and we will shred each other.... of course we don't cross certain lines that are known as serious soft spots. Very few females can joke and tease within a group without getting their nose outta joint over it. Hell if you cannot make fun of your friends why have em?! And nothing is worse than a over sensitive bitchy boy! I love hanging with gay guys because most will shred any person in sight! a4a Oh yes! Gay guys are MASTERS at that form of entertainment! So true. Oh, what about this? Have you experienced this? When talking to a woman, if a man walks in, they immediately stop paying attention to what you are saying and will even CUT YOU OFF to talk to the man! I HATE that! It's happened to me more than once with different women. VERY rude. I would never do that! Link to post Share on other sites
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