Jump to content

Where do you wear your wedding/engagement ring?


Recommended Posts

I was out for lunch with a cousin and on the table diagonally opposite was this very attractive woman sitting alone. She looked like Carrie-Anne Moss from the Matrix movies and I had half a mind to start a conversation with her. But before doing anything, I first looked at her hands to see if she was committed. She had a silver/white gold/platinum band on her left ring finger. Is that where people normally wear their wedding rings? Do some people wear it on their right hand? Perhaps on another finger? Apologies in advance if this question is waaay too stupid.

Edited by FilterCoffee
Link to post
Share on other sites

I've been wondering about this too!

 

When we went to talk to a craftsman about our wedding rings, he cautioned us to have a think about how it would look alongside the engagement ring (for the woman). Apparently lots of women like to wear both on the same finger (left ring finger). But if the colors/designs don't match up well, then they might choose to wear one on the left ring finger and another on the right. I imagine that wearing on another finger wouldn't be a great idea unless your fingers are virtually identical in size - rings are sized very closely, too loose and you risk it slipping out, too tight and it will be uncomfortable.

 

I think there's a lot of leeway for the individual to make her own choice, though. In our culture, women don't usually wear the engagement ring at all after they get married, and they just wear the wedding ring on their left ring finger. But I think it's pretty safe to say that if a woman has a ring on her left ring finger, she's either engaged, married... or is trying to ward off approaches. :laugh: Either way, probably best to respect that.

Edited by Elswyth
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
I've been wondering about this too!

 

When we went to talk to a craftsman about our wedding rings, he cautioned us to have a think about how it would look alongside the engagement ring (for the woman). Apparently lots of women like to wear both on the same finger (left ring finger). But if the colors/designs don't match up well, then they might choose to wear one on the left ring finger and another on the right. I imagine that wearing on another finger wouldn't be a great idea unless your fingers are virtually identical in size - rings are sized very closely, too loose and you risk it slipping out, too tight and it will be uncomfortable.

 

I think there's a lot of leeway for the individual to make her own choice, though. In our culture, women don't usually wear the engagement ring at all after they get married, and they just wear the wedding ring on their left ring finger. But I think it's pretty safe to say that if a woman has a ring on her left ring finger, she's either engaged, married... or is trying to ward off approaches. :laugh: Either way, probably best to respect that.

 

I didn't know people wear their engagement ring and their wedding ring. First I'm hearing of it. Are you planning on doing that? Yeah, I guess my initial screening was correct unfortunately :laugh:

Link to post
Share on other sites

Its possible a single simple band was her one and only marriage ring. Some dont like gems and fancy.

 

My wife had worn both simple band (wedding band) and more extravagant engagement ring together. Due to age and weight changes, I had the engagement ring modified for adjustable fit, and the wedding band went into the drawer. I would say that one person - just one- said my wife's engagement ring did not look like one - because its based on non diamond as the prime stone - but that is a local/cultural thing.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
I didn't know people wear their engagement ring and their wedding ring. First I'm hearing of it. Are you planning on doing that? Yeah, I guess my initial screening was correct unfortunately :laugh:

 

Where are you from, if you don't mind me asking? It's probably a cultural thing - I think in Western cultures many women do wear both? The engagement ring is the blingy one, after all (whereas the wedding ring is usually just a band), so it makes sense to show it off some of the time. :laugh:

 

I'm not sure what I plan to do, haha. Wearing both feels a bit much for me. I suppose I might do that during social events, but for everyday use I might just pick one or the other! :p

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic

Maybe this is a cultural thing. In America, it's very customary to wearing both your engagement ring and wedding ring on your left ring finger. And yes, you wear them both together, on the same finger, after you get married. The wedding ring goes on first, then the engagement ring (if you choose to keep wearing it, which most do since it's the prettiest! :) ).

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

In the tradition I was married in the wedding bands are worn on the right hand. But that is contrary to the American tradition of wearing on the left.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
Happy Lemming

I thought most jewelers made the wedding band as an interlocking or matching part of the engagement ring??

 

As a side note, I (single man) purchased a cheap wedding band and put it on to fly. For me, I was always getting double and triple checked by the TSA. It seems getting through security and boarding has been easier when I wear a wedding band. I don't know if it makes me look more stable or less dangerous, but it seems to work for me.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
I thought most jewelers made the wedding band as an interlocking or matching part of the engagement ring??

 

As a side note, I (single man) purchased a cheap wedding band and put it on to fly. For me, I was always getting double and triple checked by the TSA. It seems getting through security and boarding has been easier when I wear a wedding band. I don't know if it makes me look more stable or less dangerous, but it seems to work for me.

 

That's called a matched set. That's just one of many options.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
Where are you from, if you don't mind me asking? It's probably a cultural thing - I think in Western cultures many women do wear both? The engagement ring is the blingy one, after all (whereas the wedding ring is usually just a band), so it makes sense to show it off some of the time. :laugh:

 

I'm not sure what I plan to do, haha. Wearing both feels a bit much for me. I suppose I might do that during social events, but for everyday use I might just pick one or the other! :p

 

I'm from India Els. The woman in question was probably French since I was at a French restaurant but I can't say for sure. I'm really surprised to see how common it is to wear both. Heck, before I started this thread I thought there was only one ring involved. Now I've got to get 2? :lmao:

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
I'm from India Els. The woman in question was probably French since I was at a French restaurant but I can't say for sure. I'm really surprised to see how common it is to wear both. Heck, before I started this thread I thought there was only one ring involved. Now I've got to get 2? :lmao:

 

Ah! That makes a lot of sense. In Asian cultures it's very common to not wear an engagement ring after marriage, and indeed many traditional couples in my culture don't even HAVE engagement rings, since the "proposal" is pretty much the man talking to the woman's parents and giving them money/gifts. :lmao: We are somewhat between the two cultures, so we did have a "Western" proposal with an engagement ring. You probably don't have to get your girl an engagement ring if she's traditional!

Link to post
Share on other sites

Forgive me.... I haven't yet read all the posts, but here are the customs as I understand them.

 

In the US, women wear their engagement ring on their left ring finger, and once married, you wear the band closest to your palm, with the engagement ring next.

 

Men wear wedding bands in their left ring finger. No engagement rings.

 

I think I caught you are from India? As I understand from my Indian friends, females still wear rings on their left ring finger, but men wear them on their right.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Since we're on the topic of rings, I kinda wondered... Doesn't it get pretty heavy/cluttered to wear 2 on one finger, especially if the rings are of a heavier material (like platinum) and you have a small finger? That's probably the main reason I wouldn't wear both on one finger - it's difficult enough getting used to just one!

Link to post
Share on other sites
Happy Lemming

In the US, women wear their engagement ring on their left ring finger, and once married, you wear the band closest to your palm, with the engagement ring next.

 

This reminds me of a funny story. My girlfriend was interviewing for a job and the interviewer looked at her left hand. She said he tried to do it casually, but she caught him looking. She didn't get the job. She thought it was because she was single and they were looking for a more stable individual.

 

So I bought her a very cheap, Cubic Zirc knock off wedding set she could wear for interviewing. As it was fake, she kept it in a different part of her jewelry box. A few months later, the maintenance guy let himself into her apartment to change the A/C filters, when she wasn't there. After his visit, the CZ wedding set was missing. It was the only thing taken. We both laughed, as the guy stole the absolute cheapest thing (by far) in her jewelry box.

 

After that incident, she put all of her expensive jewelry in a safe deposit box at the bank.

Link to post
Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic
Since we're on the topic of rings, I kinda wondered... Doesn't it get pretty heavy/cluttered to wear 2 on one finger, especially if the rings are of a heavier material (like platinum) and you have a small finger? That's probably the main reason I wouldn't wear both on one finger - it's difficult enough getting used to just one!

 

Yes it could get cluttered on a small finger with large rings :). It's a preference. When I was married, I wore both, but I got engaged at age 22, to a 20 year old, so my diamond wasn't exactly extravagant and large :).

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Minor side note - a number of married men I see are wearing silicone bands instead of metal band - who lift weights regularly or engage in martial arts.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

In the US and Europe, it's common for women to wear both bands on the left hand. Some women prefer to wear just their wedding bands. For instance, a friend of mine has an opal for her engagement ring. Opals are too soft to wear daily so she defaults to her wedding band.

 

The engagement ring took A LOT of getting used to. My husband got me a gorgeous halo setting and I very rarely wear jewelry, so it was strange to go from nothing to a giant rock on my hand all the time. I am a dedicated weight lifter and it was tricky at first adjusting to something new on my very callused fingers. The first six months I got my ring caught on all sorts of things. I still get it caught on paper towel dispenser every now and then. The wedding band was a much easier adjustment. My band was custom made to fit my engagement ring and it feels quite natural.

 

Some people wear silicone rings while exercising, rock climbing, etc, but I just go without. One of the best pieces of advice I got was "your ring should be the last thing you put on when you leave, and the first thing you take off when you get home". Even though my ring is platinum I don't wear it while doing anything around the house. Meanwhile, my husband only takes his band off in the shower or when using power tools. He regularly sleeps with it on.

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

The engagement ring took A LOT of getting used to. My husband got me a gorgeous halo setting and I very rarely wear jewelry, so it was strange to go from nothing to a giant rock on my hand all the time.

 

Wow, good to know others had the same problem!! I'm right there right now, and everyone looks at me like I'm crazy when I talk about this. :o Mine isn't even raised or anything, the gems are fairly small and fairly close to the band. I really love the ring, so much thought and effort went into the design, but I'm worried that I'll never get used to it the way some people do...

 

(I do tend to be pretty OCD about sensations on my skin in general)

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
Cookiesandough

I hate rings with a passion!!! Bands suffocating your fingers. They get all sweaty under there. And then with the added weight of an engagement ring. And I like ...symmetry. I mean I'd wear it if my partner insisted, but having us not wear them would be preferable. I guess it just takes a little getting used to.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah they took a little getting used to, as I do not wear jewelry generally.

 

I will say, we purposely picked a setting where the diamond is nestled down low, and my wedding ring is a band of diamonds and sits closely to it.

 

I didn't want something that I would snag all the time - and at first I would catch it on things, but now wearing it is second nature. I feel it and notice it when I DON'T have my rings on, rather than when I do.

 

And I take them off for the gym, for horse back riding etc etc.

  • Like 4
Link to post
Share on other sites
Yeah they took a little getting used to, as I do not wear jewelry generally.

 

I will say, we purposely picked a setting where the diamond is nestled down low, and my wedding ring is a band of diamonds and sits closely to it.

 

I didn't want something that I would snag all the time - and at first I would catch it on things, but now wearing it is second nature. I feel it and notice it when I DON'T have my rings on, rather than when I do.

 

And I take them off for the gym, for horse back riding etc etc.

 

Do you guys wear them at home, as well?

Link to post
Share on other sites
Wow, good to know others had the same problem!! I'm right there right now, and everyone looks at me like I'm crazy when I talk about this. :o Mine isn't even raised or anything, the gems are fairly small and fairly close to the band. I really love the ring, so much thought and effort went into the design, but I'm worried that I'll never get used to it the way some people do...

 

(I do tend to be pretty OCD about sensations on my skin in general)

 

You will! It took me about nine months of wear before I grew accustomed to the weight and feel. Now my hand feels substantially lighter without it! I am also hypersensitive to skin sensations, so I empathize. It just takes time.

 

A friend recommended practicing everything with engagement rings. She was right! When trying them on, practice sitting on your hands, typing, scratching, using your phone, doing whatever you might do in the course of an ordinary day. It helped me get a feel for what was and wasn't comfortable. I know women are all obsessed with the ~*surprise*~ and all, but honestly I am so glad we spent a few months talking it out together and picking something I knew I'd love. Even if you know the proposal is coming it still blows your mind and you aren't ready for it.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
This reminds me of a funny story. My girlfriend was interviewing for a job and the interviewer looked at her left hand. She said he tried to do it casually, but she caught him looking. She didn't get the job. She thought it was because she was single and they were looking for a more stable individual.

 

So I bought her a very cheap, Cubic Zirc knock off wedding set she could wear for interviewing. As it was fake, she kept it in a different part of her jewelry box. A few months later, the maintenance guy let himself into her apartment to change the A/C filters, when she wasn't there. After his visit, the CZ wedding set was missing. It was the only thing taken. We both laughed, as the guy stole the absolute cheapest thing (by far) in her jewelry box.

 

After that incident, she put all of her expensive jewelry in a safe deposit box at the bank.

 

Haha great story Lemming :lmao:

 

Wow, good to know others had the same problem!! I'm right there right now, and everyone looks at me like I'm crazy when I talk about this. :o Mine isn't even raised or anything, the gems are fairly small and fairly close to the band. I really love the ring, so much thought and effort went into the design, but I'm worried that I'll never get used to it the way some people do...

 

(I do tend to be pretty OCD about sensations on my skin in general)

 

I too have such an OCD. I'm going to run into the same problems as you for sure!

 

I hate rings with a passion!!! Bands suffocating your fingers. They get all sweaty under there. And then with the added weight of an engagement ring. And I like ...symmetry. I mean I'd wear it if my partner insisted, but having us not wear them would be preferable.

 

You'll need something to keep away the dogs like me :laugh:

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
Do you guys wear them at home, as well?

 

He rarely ever wears his band, he is just too rough and tumble for jewelery.

 

Me, hahahah let's say i don't generally wear my rings unless I have a bra on. :lmao:

 

If I come home and change out of my work clothes, bra comes off, rings come off.

 

I do wear them for sex often though. I love the way my rings look on my finger when I have my hand wrapped around his cock :cool:

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

I do wear them for sex often though. I love the way my rings look on my finger when I have my hand wrapped around his cock :cool:

 

:lmao: Now that's an idea...

 

(Does that mean that you're left handed, or that you wear the rings on the right??? ;))

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...