The culture around me?

[bradt93]

I just thought of another reason why I can't seem to find a girl. It's because I'm educated and I'm stuck in a state with a low education level. I just don't seem to click here in Tennessee even though I was born here. Maybe I could find a relationship in a more educated state like CA or NY. You know people who think like me and are not ignorant. I take my goals very seriously and I'm more professional orientated than a partier or drinking type. Maybe I'm in the wrong state with the wrong type of people? I'm also liberal in a conservative state, so if I move to a liberal state, I might be able to find someone who shares the same interests?

[d0nnivain]

Liberal in a conservative state is tough but not insurmountable. I'm a conserve in a liberal state.

 

 

Join causes that you believe in to find like minded people.

 

 

Try hanging around where the educated people are -- Nashville near Vanderbilt for example. In the Styx you may have difficulty finding somebody with a degree but the lack of a piece of paper or formal education doesn't make one stupid.

[thefooloftheyear]

You only need one person....

 

TFY

[bradt93]

Liberal in a conservative state is tough but not insurmountable. I'm a conserve in a liberal state.

 

 

Join causes that you believe in to find like minded people.

 

 

Try hanging around where the educated people are -- Nashville near Vanderbilt for example. In the Styx you may have difficulty finding somebody with a degree but the lack of a piece of paper or formal education doesn't make one stupid.

Yea, I hear you, most of the women I've known can't freaking spell, but they're exceptions.

[somanymistakes]

There's a lot of nice folks in Knoxville but it's not that big a town so it might not have all the options you'd hope for.

[bradt93]

There's a lot of nice folks in Knoxville but it's not that big a town so it might not have all the options you'd hope for.

I only live 30 mins from Knoxville, so I know what you mean.

[Bastile]

I think that's a really poor attitude you have.

 

So, you can't get a girl because they are too stupid (elitism), it's everyone else with the problem (delusion), and you think the answer is to run away somewhere else (avoidance).

 

Move wherever you like. If you have no hustle, you'll always find it a struggle. I've heard guys complain about London, Paris, Miami, etc...

 

Maybe, just maybe, the problem is you?

[d0nnivain]

I only live 30 mins from Knoxville, so I know what you mean.

 

 

 

I googled Knoxville. There are 4 colleges including a law school. There are several museums & theater companies. Try spending time in & around those places. Volunteer to help the arts. Stroll through a café. I'm sure there has to be somebody who can hold up a conversation.

[CptInsano]

I googled Knoxville. There are 4 colleges including a law school. There are several museums & theater companies. Try spending time in & around those places. Volunteer to help the arts. Stroll through a café. I'm sure there has to be somebody who can hold up a conversation.

 

I travelled through Knoxville a lot. It is relatively small, and as soon as you get out of it, it is very rural. (Very beautiful too, but that is my opinion.)

 

The women there were friendly, were able to read and write, and as it is the case with most places in the south, you get hugged quite a bit.

 

If Knoxville is too small for the OP, I would strongly suggest Nashville. Been there last month, and it seems like a booming regional center with an amazing amount of wealth and plenty of commerce.

[GunslingerRoland]

I'd hesitate to move to find love until you narrow down exactly what you are missing. You say that you wish there were more educated people, but then you say it's about drinking and partying. i'm not sure what makes you think that educated professional people are less likely to drink/party but I have not seen that at all in my life. The only difference is that the parties tend to be fancier, and there may be more coke involved rather than just drinking and pot.

 

If you want to find an environment where people are less likely to be partiers, then you could look for a type of workplace where there are more people who are family oriented, somewhere with good benefits but a lower salary, like a government job or something similar...

 

Although I don't know if that is the best for you either, because those places are very family oriented and you don't want kids.

 

Can I ask you this? What are the interests that you prefer women to be into rather than partying? How do you want to spend your days with a woman? Because you don't want the family life or the party life? Are you an outdoorsy type? Do you play sports? Do you like art?

 

Because being professional is fine, but that is the time where you are not with a partner... what is the stuff that you will want to do in your freetime?

[bradt93]

I'd hesitate to move to find love until you narrow down exactly what you are missing. You say that you wish there were more educated people, but then you say it's about drinking and partying. i'm not sure what makes you think that educated professional people are less likely to drink/party but I have not seen that at all in my life. The only difference is that the parties tend to be fancier, and there may be more coke involved rather than just drinking and pot.

 

If you want to find an environment where people are less likely to be partiers, then you could look for a type of workplace where there are more people who are family oriented, somewhere with good benefits but a lower salary, like a government job or something similar...

 

Although I don't know if that is the best for you either, because those places are very family oriented and you don't want kids.

 

Can I ask you this? What are the interests that you prefer women to be into rather than partying? How do you want to spend your days with a woman? Because you don't want the family life or the party life? Are you an outdoorsy type? Do you play sports? Do you like art?

 

Because being professional is fine, but that is the time where you are not with a partner... what is the stuff that you will want to do in your freetime?

I don't really know. nothing really interests me, except working out at the gym.

[bradt93]

I googled Knoxville. There are 4 colleges including a law school. There are several museums & theater companies. Try spending time in & around those places. Volunteer to help the arts. Stroll through a café. I'm sure there has to be somebody who can hold up a conversation.

I know that and I go to college at the University of Tennessee. I'm a commuter so I don't live on campus.

[bradt93]

I'd hesitate to move to find love until you narrow down exactly what you are missing. You say that you wish there were more educated people, but then you say it's about drinking and partying. i'm not sure what makes you think that educated professional people are less likely to drink/party but I have not seen that at all in my life. The only difference is that the parties tend to be fancier, and there may be more coke involved rather than just drinking and pot.

 

If you want to find an environment where people are less likely to be partiers, then you could look for a type of workplace where there are more people who are family oriented, somewhere with good benefits but a lower salary, like a government job or something similar...

 

Although I don't know if that is the best for you either, because those places are very family oriented and you don't want kids.

 

Can I ask you this? What are the interests that you prefer women to be into rather than partying? How do you want to spend your days with a woman? Because you don't want the family life or the party life? Are you an outdoorsy type? Do you play sports? Do you like art?

 

Because being professional is fine, but that is the time where you are not with a partner... what is the stuff that you will want to do in your freetime?

No, those type of parties except for the coke part, I should've been more specific, I meant the wild bar types.

[bradt93]

I travelled through Knoxville a lot. It is relatively small, and as soon as you get out of it, it is very rural. (Very beautiful too, but that is my opinion.)

 

The women there were friendly, were able to read and write, and as it is the case with most places in the south, you get hugged quite a bit.

 

If Knoxville is too small for the OP, I would strongly suggest Nashville. Been there last month, and it seems like a booming regional center with an amazing amount of wealth and plenty of commerce.

I just don't like Tennessee anymore.

[GunslingerRoland]

No, those type of parties except for the coke part, I should've been more specific, I meant the wild bar types.

 

Okay fair enough and I agree. Most people stop with the bar life after their early 20's, with the exception of some blue collar types who can often stay in that stage forever. I do see that a lot and would struggle with it too.

 

If you are a gym nut, then focus on that in a partner. I see couples at my gym that go there for hours every day. It's a mutual hobby.

[elaine567]

I just don't like Tennessee anymore.

 

 

OK well then just move.

YOU don't have to denigrate every woman in Tennessee, to justify you moving to somewhere else.

[CptInsano]

I just don't like Tennessee anymore.

 

Then it becomes a question of where you want to live and what you can afford. Have you tried spending time in CA or NY? Or let me ask you this: Other than living in a blue state, what are you looking to get out of that move, what tangible benefits are you trying to get?

[stillafool]

I know that and I go to college at the University of Tennessee. I'm a commuter so I don't live on campus.

 

So all of the girls who attend the University of Tennessee are ignorant and can barely spell. Are they ugly too? Hmmmmm interesting.

[d0nnivain]

I don't really know. nothing really interests me, except working out at the gym.

 

I know that and I go to college at the University of Tennessee. I'm a commuter so I don't live on campus.

 

I just don't like Tennessee anymore.

 

 

I didn't realize you are still in college.

 

 

Stop going to parties if you don't like them. Do volunteer somewhere doing something that you are passionate about. Join a club. Attend lectures (not just go to class, lectures, but the cerebral discussions often held on campus). There are tons of liberal leaning groups on every college campus. Get involved with one. You will feel less isolated.

 

 

Now figure out where you want to live when you graduate & concentrate your search there.

 

 

Problem solved.

[bradt93]

I just got finished watching this movie and some high school girls played a cruel prank on this guy who was a computer programmer. They considered him a "nerd" and they said "who would want to kiss that" Not to change the subject on this thread, but can "nerds" get attractive girls? I feel like that's part of my problem, people consider me "nerdy", but it does have a lot to do with my anti-social skills.

[d0nnivain]

Of course nerds can get girls. Have you seen Steve Jobs, Bill Gates & Mark Zuckerburg? Everybody knows nerds make more money in the end.

 

Stop thinking of yourself as the nerd & start thinking of yourself at the successful brain. Develop your personality. Dress appropriately for the occasion & you will be just fine.

[somanymistakes]

Of course nerds can get girls.

 

Can they get the exact girls you want to get? Well... are you the exact guy those girls want to get?

 

I can't tell from your post whether this applies to you or not so I'm not accusing you of it, but there IS an issue sometimes where people sulk that they can't get the hottest, richest, most popular partner... while completely ignoring that they themselves are not mainstream attractive, rich, popular, OR have ANY interests in common with the person they're sighing over. Like, you have to bring something to the table, you know? There needs to be a reason why the person you're interested in would like you?

 

(Also, seriously, I thought movies about pranking nerds went out of fashion after the 80s.)

[CptInsano]

I just got finished watching this movie and some high school girls played a cruel prank on this guy who was a computer programmer. They considered him a "nerd" and they said "who would want to kiss that" Not to change the subject on this thread, but can "nerds" get attractive girls? I feel like that's part of my problem, people consider me "nerdy", but it does have a lot to do with my anti-social skills.

 

From my own experience I can say that being a nerd is far less of a problem than not being social. I've mostly been with somewhat nerdy women myself, but they were definitely attractive. But In would have never met them if I hadn't chatted them up, and attended parties or social events.

 

If you are not very social and focused on a particular type, well yes, that will compound the problem.

[GunslingerRoland]

I just got finished watching this movie and some high school girls played a cruel prank on this guy who was a computer programmer. They considered him a "nerd" and they said "who would want to kiss that" Not to change the subject on this thread, but can "nerds" get attractive girls? I feel like that's part of my problem, people consider me "nerdy", but it does have a lot to do with my anti-social skills.

 

Omg, this is 2017 not 1985. Have you been to a comic expo or something similar? Thens of thousands of gorgeous nerdy girls on the arms of nerdy guys. Nerd culture has NEVER been more in than it is now.

 

If you think this movie you watched represents real life, than you really need to get out more.

[WaitingForBardot]

I just thought of another reason why I can't seem to find a girl. It's because I'm educated and I'm stuck in a state with a low education level. I just don't seem to click here in Tennessee even though I was born here. Maybe I could find a relationship in a more educated state like CA or NY. You know people who think like me and are not ignorant. I take my goals very seriously and I'm more professional orientated than a partier or drinking type. Maybe I'm in the wrong state with the wrong type of people? I'm also liberal in a conservative state, so if I move to a liberal state, I might be able to find someone who shares the same interests?

Methinks I have spotted your problem...