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Can't commit to girlfriend of two years


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Coming up 2 years in May and don't feel that I can commit. She's a great lady but also a bit of a prude, doesn't do it for me sexually but yet expects me to do everything to her and I'm left feeling unsatisfied. She always tells me she loves me and I wish we could have a serious conversation without her saying that she loves me all the time, it drives me nuts. She has not invited to her place in months but expects to be at my place every weekend for the weekend. I don't want to sound selfish but I feel like a weekend wine and meal ticket. Please, any recomendations, do I just unload and run. Feeling trapped in Canada.

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Doesnt sound like the relationship is giving you what you are wanting in a relationship. You two sound incompatible, as far as commiting to each other. Maybe stop the weekend visits for a bit and see how you feel.

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I can't help but wonder if you're not expecting her to do stuff you've seen in porn that are not practical to do in real life and can mess up your body. If so, that's not a fair expectation.

 

She is who she is in bed. Sex isn't fun for women if they're expected to just perform.

 

I may be totally off base, but i can't imagine what else you could be talking about. She's having sex with you.

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Of all the things you have listed as "problematic" in this relationship, the most glaringly unmentioned one is that you have not had a talk with her about all these things that are bothering you.

 

Have an open conversation with her and tell her EVERYTHING you have told us.

If things don't change after that, then call it quits; allow her to be with someone who can appreciate her for who she is. Otherwise, in all fairness, if she doesn't know what's bothering you, if you don't voice your concerns, HOW exactly do you expect her to know these things?

 

And if you aren't really satisfied and aren't seeing a future with her, you keeping her around is incredibly cruel--because clearly she is in love with you and is thinking you feel the same way about you.

 

The problem is not what she is or is not doing, the problem is you not communicating with your partner in your relationship.

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