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Change in physical preference after break up


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One of my friends has always dated athletic guys but since one specific short relationship she now only dates obese guys. She broke up with the guy in question. I've had some bad break ups but I never changed my type as result. Why would someone change their type after a short relationship?

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Hey, don't knock it till you tried it.:) When girls are little, they get comforted with a teddy bear. Soft, warm, & fuzzy. Then the hormones hit - WHAM! The nice, soft teddy gets put up on a dusty shelf, and now the girl wants a Ken doll to play with. Hard, thin, unyielding, cold. It sounds like your friend is rediscovering her inner teddy... Maybe you should too?

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TheyCallMeOx

You'll have to ask her, but what people sometimes do is they'll try to date people using statistics and all that. They'll look for patterns in the people they date, and try to alter their "type" until they find the person they're looking for.

 

Maybe your friend found that athletic guys all had something in common that she didn't like, so she ventured off dating obese men to see if they're any different. Essentially, they settle for a partner they don't completely want, for certain attributes they find more important.

 

Other than that...people change. I don't know.

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CaliforniaGirl

This is going to sound horrible, but maybe she's dating unattractive guys because they'll be less likely to attract other girls/leave her?

 

This isn't necessarily reality (that a less attractive guy wont find someone else...they can, and do) but it is a mindset I have seen before.

 

P.s. Personally, I never wanted to eff my teddy bear. Just sayin'. :)

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Maybe he was too shallow and obssesed with his own body that he didnt appreciate her body !

 

Most guys who are carrying a 6 pack or guns are shallow and have nothing more in them than that and they ogle women who are on diet pills aka shallow , body obssesed women.'

 

She now wants a normal guy who has more to him than an athletic body.Everyone has their own type.

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What leads you to believe it's a change in preference? Is she going around and only flirting with obese dudes and ignoring any non-obese? Or is she having a spell where only obese dudes are approaching her while non-obese ignore her flirts? Or maybe she met a guy she likes and wants to try and he just happens to be obese.

 

How much partying has she done? Seen more women have problems with that than men.

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Maybe her preference has nothing to do with body type at all.

 

I usually date women who are funny, make me laugh, enjoy doing things outside, riding motorcycles etc. Also women who know how to just enjoy life and have good attitudes. If you don't have a sense of humor, and a somewhat raunchy one at that, you aren't gonna cut it. As it happens, most of them have been rather athletic also.

 

My current gf is not. She's heavier than anyone I've gone out with. But after the first date, where she had me cracking up all night, and kept looking me directly in the eye while talking to me, I knew she had everything else in spades. No-one has made me laugh more, seemed more interested in what I say, than her. Nor have I looked as forward to seeing someone as much I do her . I literally can't wait to see her, or to put my lips to hers.

 

That's the stuff that really matters to me, and it turns out that I've found it in a somewhat bigger package. Perhaps its the same for this girl. The outer package my not be what ultimately attracts her.

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I found from her sister that she thought the guy didn't like her or was interested in someone else so it looks to be an issue of insecurity. The strange thing we were drove past the guy she broke up with and she gasped when she saw him, any ideas what that means? She seemed to be embarrassed when I noticed or else I would've asked about it.

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It's not that big of a leap from big thick jocks to a big overweight guy. But if she's going from tall thin basketball types to something else, well, maybe she's just versatile. Most people are not that versatile, but some are, and they always have a man, too, and aren't going without sex. So... whatever floats her boat. I wish I liked short fat bald guys and women. I'd be swinging, baby!

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Had an obese gf once. Gotta admit , it was really nice snuggling all over her, sorta all snuggy and cosey.

 

The friend , yeah , l'm goin with the inner teddy theory :D

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Was the guy that caused this change obese? That would make more sense. Certainly people refine and hone in on their preferences as they see different people.

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CaliforniaGirl
I found from her sister that she thought the guy didn't like her or was interested in someone else so it looks to be an issue of insecurity. The strange thing we were drove past the guy she broke up with and she gasped when she saw him, any ideas what that means? She seemed to be embarrassed when I noticed or else I would've asked about it.

 

She was just really really hurt and is still really affected when she sees him.

 

She obviously REALLY liked this guy.

 

She'll get over this, but it will take some time.

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Was the guy that caused this change obese?
No he was built like a Marine. I've known her since high school and she's always dated guys who were in good physical shape. Since she broke up with the noted guy she's dated only obese guys. The latest guy is like 6' 280-300 lbs.
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She was just really really hurt and is still really affected when she sees him.
I thought maybe he had been violent and that's why she reacted like that. I've only seen that reaction in horror movies where people are suddenly spooked. I guess what you said makes senses even it was a short relationship.

She obviously REALLY liked this guy.

Yeah that's the vibe I got from her after she introduced me to him and I when I seen them together a few times later.

She'll get over this, but it will take some time.
I think it's unhealthy for anyone to change as a result of a setback. Besides, I happened to be at her place and that guy called her weeks after she broke up him so obviously he's interested in her. She didn't think she would hear from him again yet thinks there is no way he could be interested. She has so much insecurity and that's not like her.
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