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Is he attracted to me?


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So I'll be brief, a couple of days ago I had a friend contact this guy I've been crushing on for most of my adult life to see if he atleast found me atractive since my friends was/is his childhood friend. My friend asked him through an online chat what he thought about me, if he found me atractive. My crush would keep asking him why he was asking that kind of question. Later on, my crush called him (my friend) from his phone and kept asking him that same question but my friend only told him to say yes or no "do you think she's hot yes or no?". Once again my crush refused to answer and just stayed quiet on the phone. After a bit he just said to my friend that he would call him up later and consequently hung up.

 

My question is his reaction, why would he act that way? What does it mean? Usually in my experience if you don't find someone atractive you blurt it our straight away. You don't even think about it. So thus my confused addled brain. Please help me, I don't do these kinds of things but this guy has my brain in ashes since I was 16 and I'm 21.... I need to know. :(

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CaliforniaGirl

I hate to say it but he Kay having just been it all as a silly game and he was annoyed about that.

 

Can I ask how old you are now?

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I suppose your crush was concerned about what might happen if he answered that question truthfully - would it be passed on to you or not? Was his mate just teasing him? He might have been embarassed whether he said he liked you or not. If your friend had said something like 'well, she might like you so I'd like to get an idea of your thoughts about her', then maybe he would have been more forthcoming.

Edited by spiderowl
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He doesn't like being pushed to give an answer to something. He's a grown man If he wanted to ask you out, he would have done it by now. He doesn't feel like gossiping about this with a third party. Right now he's probably creeped out by the whole thing.

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No, he is not attracted to you. And he was clearly annoyed at your friend for pushing the matter after he made it clear that the topic was not open for discussion.

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Yikes. Stop encouraging others to meddle in your dating life. You're no longer in high school where giggly gossip about who likes who and friends confronting your crushes about whether they might like you happens. You're an adult now.

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T-16bullseyeWompRat

Here's a thought. Instead of playing silly little kids games and running around like a 13 year old asking friends to see if someone likes you or not, how about grow up and ask him yourself? Tell him you would like to go out together and suggest something.

 

Tell him yourself. Stop acting like a dang 14 year old girl. You said you are an adult? Start acting like one. Its perfectly acceptable for a girl to ask out a guy here in 2017. Nobody cares except for "traditional" folks (read old farts). Just woman up and ask him out. Stop trying to pretend you are still in middle school. That's probably a huge turn off for him. I know it would be for me.

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Here's a thought. Instead of playing silly little kids games and running around like a 13 year old asking friends to see if someone likes you or not, how about grow up and ask him yourself? Tell him you would like to go out together and suggest something.

 

Tell him yourself. Stop acting like a dang 14 year old girl. You said you are an adult? Start acting like one. Its perfectly acceptable for a girl to ask out a guy here in 2017. Nobody cares except for "traditional" folks (read old farts). Just woman up and ask him out. Stop trying to pretend you are still in middle school. That's probably a huge turn off for him. I know it would be for me.

 

Uh, wow, not even "traditional" old farts like myself would pull one of these stunts. When I'm interested in a guy - I approach him myself.

 

I don't like all this "asking around" stuff. People are nosy, gossipy, and I don't like people in my business.

 

Now, yes, it does help when you have friends, people of your church - who may know some guy you have your eye on and there's ways to go about asking them what they think/know of him. And, it's good when you have people who can let you know if he's involved, a jerk, ok, etc.

 

But, in the OP's situation, it comes off as a game that kids would play and dude probably felt put on the spot and/or felt that this was a game being played on him.

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