Flower555 Posted November 29, 2016 Share Posted November 29, 2016 Hello, I dont know where to start. Known him for 2 years, I feel really scared so alone, i dont know im scared to leave the relationship i feel i got manipulated and controlled into staying and now i have so many issues and cant leave. i have tried to tell him how i feel , i dont know how to deal with this. I dont know how to cut him off i feel alone and scared ...... no proper friends..and health problemss Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted November 29, 2016 Share Posted November 29, 2016 I really want to help, but you haven't given us much to go on. First thing first, do you feel safe at the momen? Do you think he may hurt you if you leave? Do you have an income? Do you live with him? Who's names are on the lease/mortgage? Will your family support you? Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted November 29, 2016 Share Posted November 29, 2016 Just leave him. You're already in a very bad situation so maybe life without him will be bad too but you never know...it may just be better. Don't be afraid. Search yourself and find your courage. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Flower555 Posted November 29, 2016 Author Share Posted November 29, 2016 HEllo Thankyou for the messages, No i live with my parents, he doesnt help with money anyway i have depression and anxiety and no friends really, cant work much at all and health problems, he is suppised to help with it and he tries, i am trying to get courage he is like my best friend.. I will put more details tonight thanku guys xxxxx Link to post Share on other sites
Author Flower555 Posted November 29, 2016 Author Share Posted November 29, 2016 Yes i am safe x Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted November 29, 2016 Share Posted November 29, 2016 HEllo Thankyou for the messages, No i live with my parents, he doesnt help with money anyway i have depression and anxiety and no friends really, cant work much at all and health problems, he is suppised to help with it and he tries, i am trying to get courage he is like my best friend.. I will put more details tonight thanku guys xxxxx The fact you live with your parents makes it much easier. You may call him a 'best friend', but best friends don't manipulate and control. Instead, they love and support. I think that perhaps he's your only friend and so you give him more worth than he deserves. When I left my first marriage years ago, I had nobody much left in my life. It was scary starting again, but I began by getting back in contact with old friends, explaining my situation and apologising for my absence. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Flower555 Posted November 29, 2016 Author Share Posted November 29, 2016 Thankyou for the reply. I had another long talk with him today, laid it all out on the line. he said its his trauma from his divorce. I dont know i am starting to go out more with girl friends even though they are different to me, i didnt tell him, he gets the ****s coz they are a bit out there. Thanks for teh support. i will keep messaging here. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Flower555 Posted November 29, 2016 Author Share Posted November 29, 2016 Hi, I cant break it off with this guy. but i dont know how to just be friends anymore i try but it never works and he keeps saying we are meant to be but he is divorced and isnt over his trauma now i have trauma and cant leave him. Its really realy really hard doctor prescribed me medication for the anxiety and ibs but i dont know how to get through everything else and i needed him to help me get through a ear/jaw issue..but now im thinking im so lonely and unwell to be alone. He loves talking about his problems so much i really dont know how to set boundaries...how do i have him in my life and still move on? Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted November 29, 2016 Share Posted November 29, 2016 You are being your own worst enemy keeping him around when you don't feel the same way. No, you won't be able to move on with him in your life. Why can't you break up with him? I know it's not easy, but it is possible. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted November 29, 2016 Share Posted November 29, 2016 Thankyou for the reply. I had another long talk with him today, laid it all out on the line. he said its his trauma from his divorce. I dont know i am starting to go out more with girl friends even though they are different to me, i didnt tell him, he gets the ****s coz they are a bit out there. Thanks for teh support. i will keep messaging here. Good that you don't tell him about seeing your girlfriends. Build your new life up so that it's ready for you to join when you leave him. How old are you both? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Blackened Heart Posted November 30, 2016 Share Posted November 30, 2016 One rule I will say that I follow and I know some don't agree, is that you can't be friends with an ex. If you are going to end things, end things completely. Don't try being "nice" or softening the blow, make a clean cut and go no contact, for your own sake. Link to post Share on other sites
LargoLagg Posted November 30, 2016 Share Posted November 30, 2016 Just leave. Better to start at zero than negative something. Link to post Share on other sites
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