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Will not having friends lead to an unhealthy relationship?


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juststarry6443

I've known my boyfriend for over 7 years. We went to high school together & know of the same people. I wouldn't say I'm a people person & my already small social circle has pretty much diminished as I got older. I don't have any friends of my own where I can make plans to go have lunch or go window shopping with. The only socializing I do are with his friends at bars/clubs or parties.

I'm afraid I may become clingy because I can't always be included in things. He can make plans on Friday nights & the only plans I may have that wouldn't include him is my big family events since our relationship is fairly new.

What are some tips I can follow to assure I don't lose myself and avoid an unhealthy relationship?

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It's good that you're aware that this difference might present problems.

 

I've never been particularly outgoing myself, sometimes I liked it this way and other times I didn't.

 

In a relationship w/ someone who is a social person it can create difficulties if allowed.

 

If you focus only on your partner it may come across as clingy, if you let it bother you it may actually make you clingy.

 

Neither of these are good.

 

I was affected the most by this once when a relationship ended and suddenly I realized that all of our friends had actually been her friends and I had nobody I could talk to or hang out with.

 

I think things can be made to work out well if you both care for each other and keep in mind and respect the others social needs and differences.

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Find new ways of connecting with people.

 

Consider volunteering. It's a great way of meeting and interacting with people, whilst at the the same benefiting others. Even a couple of hours a week is valuable.

 

It's almost inevitable that you'll make a friend or two, in that setting.

 

Give it some thought.

 

 

Take care.

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As long as you are conscious of the potential problem, it shouldn't be a problem. You don't necessarily need new friends as long as you can entertain yourself when he is off doing something else so you aren't complaining if he has other plans, you will be fine.

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