AugustSnow Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Ladies or even guys if you want to answer, would you consider it a red flag if a guy lies to a woman about how old he is, especially if the woman is younger? Or would you overlook that and chop it up as a form of flattery and him trying to impress her? Link to post Share on other sites
Siquijor Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 No. Women do it all the time. Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Ladies or even guys if you want to answer, would you consider it a red flag if a guy lies to a woman about how old he is, especially if the woman is younger? Or would you overlook that and chop it up as a form of flattery and him trying to impress her? A guy lying about his age has NOTHING to do with 'flattering' a woman. He's lying so he can improve his chances with women who wouldn't want him if they knew his real age. LOL...when I was doing online dating I'd been chatting to one guy who claimed to be 51. He eventually told me he was actually 63 "but since he didn't look older than 51, that's the age he put in his profile." I thought he looked damned old for 51 but didn't tell him that. I also didn't waste any more of my time with the old fool. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Got it Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Ladies or even guys if you want to answer, would you consider it a red flag if a guy lies to a woman about how old he is, especially if the woman is younger? Or would you overlook that and chop it up as a form of flattery and him trying to impress her? I think anyone lying about their age is a red flag. The issue is the lying. 9 Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 The issue is the lying. About the best spin you can put on it is that it's rooted in insecurity, and if that's the best you've got you sure don't have much to work with. I really don't get it. I'm proud of my age (53) and the fact that I've cheated death long enough to make it this far. Why lie about it? Vanity? Hell, I'm plenty vain, but it runs more along the lines of "hey, I make 53 look GOOD." 2 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Don't be flattered, he's just trying to get laid by a younger woman. He obviously isn't looking for anythig serious and does not plan to be around long enough for you to know the truth about his real age. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
understand50 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Never had to lie about my age, as I am not chasing younger women, but I know some guys who have tried to lie about how old they are in the job market. Does not work, as when they do the back ground check it comes up. Lying in general just does not work....... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Got it Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 About the best spin you can put on it is that it's rooted in insecurity, and if that's the best you've got you sure don't have much to work with. I really don't get it. I'm proud of my age (53) and the fact that I've cheated death long enough to make it this far. Why lie about it? Vanity? Hell, I'm plenty vain, but it runs more along the lines of "hey, I make 53 look GOOD." That is how I have always felt. Your age is your age, lying about it doesn't change it. Just own it and be proud. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
PrettyEmily77 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Ladies or even guys if you want to answer, would you consider it a red flag if a guy lies to a woman about how old he is, especially if the woman is younger? Or would you overlook that and chop it up as a form of flattery and him trying to impress her? More than a red flag - I'd be out of the door without looking back or wondering the reasons for the lie. If he gets too comfortable lying to try and impress, he might try to start lying about other stuff (job, family situation, size of his d..k, etc...). Plus that stuff gets find out anyway, like pretty much most lies, really... 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Got it Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Never had to lie about my age, as I am not chasing younger women, but I know some guys who have tried to lie about how old they are in the job market. Does not work, as when they do the back ground check it comes up. Lying in general just does not work....... Why are they needing to give their age at all? It is illegal to ask a candidate of their age outside of asking if they are 18 and over. So not understanding why they even need to lie about it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Maleficent Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Ladies or even guys if you want to answer, would you consider it a red flag if a guy lies to a woman about how old he is, especially if the woman is younger? Or would you overlook that and chop it up as a form of flattery and him trying to impress her? That has happened to me a lot with OLD. They always have 'the perfect excuse' but really it's still a lie. And a stupid one at that. Next. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author AugustSnow Posted August 31, 2015 Author Share Posted August 31, 2015 I think anyone lying about their age is a red flag. The issue is the lying. Right. I recently had something like that happen. I met someone recently and we were talking and the conversation went well, I thought, we exchanged phone numbers, and I asked him how old he was, and he told me he was 30 at first, which I knew was a lie, and knowing me, since I work at a public library, I looked his name up in our database since I am sure his name would be there, and it said he is actually 54, yet he still kept lying about his age. So I finally broke it to him and told him that I already know how old he is and to give it up and that I found his name in our database at my job and he was shocked and then he told me that he was afraid to tell me his real age because he liked me and was afraid that would run me off. I tried to overlook that because it was minuscule (when I know it's anything BUT), but then I realized it was a red flag and it was a matter of times when other red flags followed suit with him. Our first phone conversation was great, but the second one? Not so much. He sounded drunk. I asked him was he drinking. He said he did have something to drink, a 6-pack of beer but denies that he was drunk. That was my last time ever talking to him. I was upfront with him and told him right out that he wasn't ready for me. I haven't heard from him since. One thing I learned was, once a person shows who they really are, believe them the first time. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AugustSnow Posted August 31, 2015 Author Share Posted August 31, 2015 That is how I have always felt. Your age is your age, lying about it doesn't change it. Just own it and be proud. That's what I told him. I also told him that lying to me is an attempt to insult my intelligence and that if we are going to get to know one another, we must be honest with each other, but since other red flags about him have quickly come to surface, so that whole getting to know each other ship has more than sailed. I've cut him off with the quickness. Link to post Share on other sites
understand50 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Why are they needing to give their age at all? It is illegal to ask a candidate of their age outside of asking if they are 18 and over. So not understanding why they even need to lie about it. Got it, Sure they can not ask legally, but they have their ways of finding out. It comes back on the back ground check. They will ask when you when graduated from High school, and there are other ways. Point is trying to hide your age or out right lying does not work. I never try and "hide" my age, I will get hire or not. Link to post Share on other sites
JustGettingBy Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I think anyone lying about their age is a red flag. The issue is the lying. Pretty much this. Makes you wonder what else the person is lying about. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted September 1, 2015 Share Posted September 1, 2015 (edited) I would see it as a weakness and I suppose a red flag of that. If a guy can't be honest about something so fundamental about himself, then what else is he going to avoid? I dislike it intensely when people lie about age on dating profiles. The 'My real age is XXX, sorry couldn't change it on this profile' line gets really tedious. If a guy cannot put two numbers in the correct order, then something is seriously wrong with him. I do have a friend who I know lies about his age. He became a friend long before I knew he did this. I don't like it. It bothers me about him, but I trust him in other respects. I wouldn't date him though. The age thing leaves me feeling uneasy somehow. If I ever met a guy and found out later he'd lied about his age, I would be inclined to leave him. Deception is unnecessary. Edited September 1, 2015 by spiderowl 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted September 1, 2015 Share Posted September 1, 2015 (edited) Ladies or even guys if you want to answer, would you consider it a red flag if a guy lies to a woman about how old he is, especially if the woman is younger? Or would you overlook that and chop it up as a form of flattery and him trying to impress her? Yes it would be a red flag. How is lying about one's age flattery? I don't see the purpose of lying about your age and if I found this out I'd assume he was insecure or ashamed of his real age which is why he did it and that would turn me off. I much prefer a secure and confident man who isn't afraid to admit who he is, age and all, and have me take him or leave him based on the truth than an insecure one who has to lie and misrepresent to get dates. Edited September 1, 2015 by MissBee 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Imported Posted September 1, 2015 Share Posted September 1, 2015 If you look younger than you are, why lie? Are you where you should be in life? Financially stable, steady income, a plan for the future and such? If you do look younger than you are look ridiculously attractive for any age and a girl is physically attracted to you, the worst thing you could do is lie about your age. I mean, what is the point? If they like the way you look, they'll probably be fine with it. Nobody is ever fine with being lied to. Unless they're stupid. They always google my name and figure it out on their own anyway lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted September 1, 2015 Share Posted September 1, 2015 Most of the men I met when I was doing OLD some months ago lied about their age. For me it was an instant deal-breaker. I can't tolerate lies. I did a little informal research into the matter when I discovered that a guy I really liked lied about his age, and discovered that it's extremely common for both men and women on OLD to fabricate numerous aspects of their profile - height, weight, age, very outdated photos, different job titles, etc. It really made OLD lose what little bit of luster it had for me, pointed out that many (most?) people are trying to get dates based on this fake projection of themselves. I felt foolish, because I made sure that my profile was a very accurate, non-exaggerated reflection of who I am. Every detail was true, and I avoided any over-the-top glamour shot photos. I never dated a guy I met in real life who lied about his age - only guys from OLD. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
kilgore Posted September 1, 2015 Share Posted September 1, 2015 Most of the men I met when I was doing OLD some months ago lied about their age. For me it was an instant deal-breaker. I can't tolerate lies. I did a little informal research into the matter when I discovered that a guy I really liked lied about his age, and discovered that it's extremely common for both men and women on OLD to fabricate numerous aspects of their profile - height, weight, age, very outdated photos, different job titles, etc. It really made OLD lose what little bit of luster it had for me, pointed out that many (most?) people are trying to get dates based on this fake projection of themselves. I felt foolish, because I made sure that my profile was a very accurate, non-exaggerated reflection of who I am. Every detail was true, and I avoided any over-the-top glamour shot photos. I never dated a guy I met in real life who lied about his age - only guys from OLD. I agree that it is best not to lie but can't we also be understanding that people have things like their age, weight, etc about which they are insecure? Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted September 1, 2015 Share Posted September 1, 2015 Ladies or even guys if you want to answer, would you consider it a red flag if a guy lies to a woman about how old he is, especially if the woman is younger? Or would you overlook that and chop it up as a form of flattery and him trying to impress her? If he looks great (and I mean that literally), I don't really care. Although I would prefer it if he didn't lie, as it would show that he had more confidence. Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted September 1, 2015 Share Posted September 1, 2015 I actually see it as a positive trend that more men are lying about their age... It means they are facing the same problems and judgments about aging that women have had to face for eons. Sounds good to me. I think people are better off dating similar age people anyway. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Got it Posted September 1, 2015 Share Posted September 1, 2015 Got it, Sure they can not ask legally, but they have their ways of finding out. It comes back on the back ground check. They will ask when you when graduated from High school, and there are other ways. Point is trying to hide your age or out right lying does not work. I never try and "hide" my age, I will get hire or not. Actually they can't ask when you graduated high school. It is the same thing. And once you get to a background check, the offer should have been made verbally and in writing so rejecting someone based on a background check has a very finite allowance. The NLRB and EEOC has really focused on background check discrimination and so even something on a criminal background check, unless it shows that it will directly impact the company, employees, or customers can not be used as a reason to exclude. Also, credit checks are not allowed to be done unless it is very specific to a position, say like a CFO candidate. Then that is a direct impact. But , say AR clerk, nope, shouldn't run it. I am not saying companies aren't still violating these areas but their chances of being sued are at their highest at this time. And age discrimination has been a focal point with the EEOC for a number of years now. So, no, one shouldn't lie about their age, but if it involves employment one should directly say that they aren't going to answer. And that is a MAJOR red flag against their prospective employer. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AugustSnow Posted September 1, 2015 Author Share Posted September 1, 2015 Yes it would be a red flag. How is lying about one's age flattery? I don't see the purpose of lying about your age and if I found this out I'd assume he was insecure or ashamed of his real age which is why he did it and that would turn me off. I much prefer a secure and confident man who isn't afraid to admit who he is, age and all, and have me take him or leave him based on the truth than an insecure one who has to lie and misrepresent to get dates. I asked him why is he insecure about his age and he said that he isn't and that I might be insecure about his age, which didn't make sense to me at all. Come to find out later, he was worried that his age would scare me off, so really, who is the insecure one? He isn't very bright. I had to leave him alone. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author AugustSnow Posted September 1, 2015 Author Share Posted September 1, 2015 If you look younger than you are, why lie? Are you where you should be in life? Financially stable, steady income, a plan for the future and such? If you do look younger than you are look ridiculously attractive for any age and a girl is physically attracted to you, the worst thing you could do is lie about your age. I mean, what is the point? If they like the way you look, they'll probably be fine with it. Nobody is ever fine with being lied to. Unless they're stupid. They always google my name and figure it out on their own anyway lol. This is a great way to look at it as far as where you should be in life financial wise and all. He lives with his folks AND doesn't even have a car. I can deal with the not having a car to a certain extent, but to ALSO not have his own place? I'm a lot younger than he is and I have both. Come on now! Link to post Share on other sites
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