Camaro Guy Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 Just recently got the stones to cold approach and I ****ing love it. I've been turned down, blown out, and sideswiped but I got 8 numbers this week alone and currently 3 dates so far. I truly think if a lot of guys stepped up their social skills and actually learned how to shield themselves from rejection and approach women in a tactful manner, it would be so much better for everyone. It completely baffles me how guys patiently wait on their social circle to cough up a girl or use online dating with a high flake rate. If your social circle has like 3 girls in it but 1 of those girls is in a relationship and the other two are unattractive, you will be operating from a place of scarcity. I know because I was one of those guys. I didn't do online dating but I solely relied on social circle and the occasional bar. I just love the rush. I love the rush of cold approach. I love sacking up, stepping up, and saying what I need to say. I love getting rejected or blown out because it's one step closer to meeting a cool chick. I really thank my cool friends for coaching me to do this. Guys, if you have friends that are lame as **** DITCH THEM. I just recently cut out so many of the losers I used to hang around with and now I got a good clique of 5 core guys. These are all solid guys. I love rolling up to the bar with these guys. When you hear about success, you don't hear about the many failures. For every guy that has a girlfriend or wife that other guys would chop their leg off for, he worked to get her. He had his life in order and he was just able to rise above the surface of all the other men she's ever met. I love this because it improves me as a man. It helps me learn how to talk to people better. Relate to women better. Love it. If you're not doing it, you should try it out. It truly is a much better way to live. 12 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 Glad you are enjoying it. It can work but it takes a very confident person to pull it off. It's not for everybody. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 What a great, positive post. Good for you, man. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Krieger Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 I life in the introvert capital of America and the cold approach will work if you can make it work. There is this fine Asian/ Hawaiian girl to bad she taken . She kinda of a regular customer it been 90 degrees the last few days . Anyway I said to her how is it going and she said I am hot and I said yea you are and laugh and she laugh see seemed to not mind me saying that . Some woman like a guy to grab the bull by the horns and some woman do not. Link to post Share on other sites
Quiet Storm Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Not gonna lie, my husband pulled me using the cold approach. There are lots of great women out there who are just waiting for the right guy to approach them. Don't be scared of rejection. Accept it and move on to the next. Find the one that's meant for you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ltjg45 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Now's the hard part: finding women I like enough to cold approach. Because I hasn't seen a woman that I would want in the past 2 months. I only saw a few that I am lukewarm about at best and those women are taken. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
The Poster Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 So wait, what exactly is the cold approach? Is it simply walking up to a random girl and asking her out? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 So wait, what exactly is the cold approach? Is it simply walking up to a random girl and asking her out? Yes. You do talk a few minutes 1st. And the approach takes place somewhere unexpected, not a bar or somewhere that people "traditionally" meet. For example, my cousin met his EX wife on a train platform. He doesn't normally take the train so it's not like they were looking at each other for a few weeks 1st. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
2.50 a gallon Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Simple. You meet a woman anywhere, out shopping, grocery store, library, waiting for a bus, wine festival, where ever, that you find attractive, that you have never met or been introduced to, and you find a way to talk to her. I found I that sometimes I did not have to immediately get their number. I could figure out where I might meet them again. Just exchange names, and just talk, no pressure, just talk. True sometimes I never saw them again. But often enough we would cross paths and talk again. Several times I hit a club to find them come in with their friends, and almost instantly have a connection. Drink, dance and talk As for the results, I met my ex-fiancé and my current lady of almost 20 years by the cold approach 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Camaro Guy Posted July 3, 2015 Author Share Posted July 3, 2015 To me, it is even a privilege that I get to do this. It is a privilege that I have to prove myself worthy to even play the game of push and pull that we call "dating". It is a privilege to be able to adjust myself to each girl. You get out of it what you put into it. You really do. Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 To me, it is even a privilege that I get to do this. It is a privilege that I have to prove myself worthy to even play the game of push and pull that we call "dating". It is a privilege to be able to adjust myself to each girl. You get out of it what you put into it. You really do. This warms my heart You rock. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
bluestealth Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 So I'm assuming you can cold approach a woman just about anywhere right? I've never done it before, but there's this really nice and cute girl at Lowe's that I'd like to try it on sometime! I've went up to her a couple of times just to ask where to find something but that's all I've had the nerves to do so far, haha. I recently read this article about doing cold approaches: Why Cold Approach Works Better Than Anything Else | Girls Chase Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpybutfun Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 I always loved the cold approach...loved that chase...like hunting...the adrenaline...the eye meets eye stare....the twirling of her hair around her finger....the shy smile....the cute giggle when I approached and muttered some self deprecating inane remark and smiled and showed my dimples (hey, we all have our tools.) Sure, I was rejected some...but I had a helluva time anyway. My wife loves to hear about my single years. I try to explain this approach to my twentysomething son, and he looks at me like I have three heads because that is just not how it is done anymore. Grumps 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 I recently read this article about doing cold approaches: Why Cold Approach Works Better Than Anything Else | Girls Chase Hmm, I find this article interesting. I've never been cold-approached, and have rarely ever seen it happen around me, so I wonder if it's effectiveness hinges on whether it's happening in a region where it's more commonplace. When I was single, had I been cold-approached, I think I would've been stunned, confused, in denial of what was happening, and horribly awkward! I can only imagine the look that might be on my face as I process whatever had been said over and over in my head, wheels turning, wondering if I was hearing correctly or perceiving something very wrong... Alternately, women who live in an area where this may happen frequently, have experienced and seen it more often, and consequently wouldn't be quite so "deer in headlights". In those cases, I can see it being a reasonably successful endeavor. Link to post Share on other sites
S_A Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 (edited) I'll totally check out the above referenced article later. Cold approaches can work if you see it as fun and don't sweat getting rejected. You're less likely to come off as desperate that way. I'll never forget my first cold approach. I was maybe 20? The girl was probably 25 or 26. I got rejected and, guess what? It was an awesome feeling lmao! The girl was sweet. She was flattered and turned me down by saying she had a BF. She kept a big smile and offered that we could still do lunch! It was the most tasteful way to reject someone ever. She's my hero (well, one of them) for that The next day she came around with the BF, and I have to say... I was surprised to see a sweet, thoughtful, and good-looking girl like that with a BF that makes you He was old, doughy, balding, and a biker. I'm sure the girl mentioned to her BF that she got hit on because it was something that made her feel good and she just wanted to share it (my GF likes to share). It looked like he showed up to fight because he was trying to look super tough. Loser IMO. ... I can see it being a reasonably successful endeavor. I've seen many guys crash n' burn. Actually, saying they crash n' burned is being nice. Edited July 11, 2015 by S_A Link to post Share on other sites
Snakechammah Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 A few months ago, I was cold approached in the most unusual way. I was feeding pigeons in the park, looking like a homeless woman from the streets. This uber cool Romanian guy who apparently was working in the nearby area, walked up to me, extended a hand and introduced himself. Very confident. No fuss. No arrogance. He talked about the pigeons, saying stuff like "i wonder if this pigeon has a boyfriend" (and me turning lobster red)... "i think this one has a name"... etc.. Turns out, we had an awesome discussion about life. He approached me at 3pm and we talked, and talked and talked for hours and finally parted at 11pm!!! We didn't go for toilet breaks, eat or drink. We basically sat there talking for 8 hours straight!! That was the craziest cold approach in my entire life. He has since been friendzoned and is now a very very good friend of mine. He is a master of cold approach and comes to me for advice on the girls he's approached/and his lovelife. I absolutely adore him! Link to post Share on other sites
S_A Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 (edited) May I ask why you friendzoned him? It was a surprise ending to your story. I was feeding pigeons in the park, looking like a homeless woman from the streets. Some guys have great taste and can see right through illusory things like "looking like a homeless woman" Edited July 11, 2015 by S_A 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 Just recently got the stones to cold approach and I ****ing love it. I've been turned down, blown out, and sideswiped but I got 8 numbers this week alone and currently 3 dates so far. I truly think if a lot of guys stepped up their social skills and actually learned how to shield themselves from rejection and approach women in a tactful manner, it would be so much better for everyone. It completely baffles me how guys patiently wait on their social circle to cough up a girl or use online dating with a high flake rate. If your social circle has like 3 girls in it but 1 of those girls is in a relationship and the other two are unattractive, you will be operating from a place of scarcity. I know because I was one of those guys. I didn't do online dating but I solely relied on social circle and the occasional bar. I just love the rush. I love the rush of cold approach. I love sacking up, stepping up, and saying what I need to say. I love getting rejected or blown out because it's one step closer to meeting a cool chick. I really thank my cool friends for coaching me to do this. Guys, if you have friends that are lame as **** DITCH THEM. I just recently cut out so many of the losers I used to hang around with and now I got a good clique of 5 core guys. These are all solid guys. I love rolling up to the bar with these guys. When you hear about success, you don't hear about the many failures. For every guy that has a girlfriend or wife that other guys would chop their leg off for, he worked to get her. He had his life in order and he was just able to rise above the surface of all the other men she's ever met. I love this because it improves me as a man. It helps me learn how to talk to people better. Relate to women better. Love it. If you're not doing it, you should try it out. It truly is a much better way to live. Wish I had your mindset Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 Wish I had your mindset Adopt it. >>>>>>>> Link to post Share on other sites
Snakechammah Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 May I ask why you friendzoned him? It was a surprise ending to your story. Some guys have great taste and can see right through illusory things like "looking like a homeless woman" Haha.. well, we have different directions in life. We click really well intellectually and are more like brothers/sisters/totally-friendzone types, lol. Mr Romanian confessed he was banging 3-4 random girls in a week (some cold approach, some from Tinder). He wasn't relationship-material. Apparently, I am different to the girls he is used to, so he finds me refreshing and trust me a lot with his emotions/secrets/family history/etc. There is no way I'd want a relationship with a guy who has had 10,000 one night stands! I do appreciate his honesty though. And he's ok with being friendzoned. So it works out well for both of us. In fact, I'll see him tomorrow - every Sunday, at the pigeon place! We'll share about our weekly dating life haha! Link to post Share on other sites
Jonp219 Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 Does the way you dress matter when you approach? Link to post Share on other sites
Male Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 (edited) I really thank my cool friends for coaching me to do this. Guys, if you have friends that are lame as **** DITCH THEM. I just recently cut out so many of the losers I used to hang around with and now I got a good clique of 5 core guys. These are all solid guys. I love rolling up to the bar with these guys. Because guys that dont live their life around scoring chicks just couldnt possibly be cool or worth hanging out with right? What a complete self centered person. I'm sure women will just love being with a guy that is only using them to feed his new found rush/addiction. Having the balls to cold approach women, and try for a date is fine. Thats great that a guy can overcome and start doing that. But trashing people because they dont do it...so classy. How quick you are to forget that you were one of those people not long ago. Edited July 14, 2015 by Male 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Because guys that dont live their life around scoring chicks just couldnt possibly be cool or worth hanging out with right? What a complete self centered person. I'm sure women will just love being with a guy that is only using them to feed his new found rush/addiction. Having the balls to cold approach women, and try for a date is fine. Thats great that a guy can overcome and start doing that. But trashing people because they dont do it...so classy. How quick you are to forget that you were one of those people not long ago. You know, when I read the original post, I felt a bit sad about that and almost said something, but held back because I know that overall this post is about positivity and improvement. It's true though OP, it's sad that you would ditch your old friends and call them "lame". If they were awful people then sure, I'm all for cutting bad people out of one's life, but if the only reason you have is that they are "lame", well, that's really sad. Those people were your friends, and now you're too cool? It is entirely possible to improve yourself and improve your dating life without having to drop the people who aren't "cool" enough. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
oldshirt Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 You know, when I read the original post, I felt a bit sad about that and almost said something, but held back because I know that overall this post is about positivity and improvement. It's true though OP, it's sad that you would ditch your old friends and call them "lame". If they were awful people then sure, I'm all for cutting bad people out of one's life, but if the only reason you have is that they are "lame", well, that's really sad. Those people were your friends, and now you're too cool? It is entirely possible to improve yourself and improve your dating life without having to drop the people who aren't "cool" enough. There's obviously some truth to what you are saying, but there is also truth to what Camaro was saying too. If Camaro's objectives were to increase his score in World of Warcraft, she should probably keep hanging out with his old buddies. but if his objective is to score with chicks, he needs to spend time with guys who score with chicks. We are the average of the 5 or so people we spend the most time with. If those 5 people are sitting in their mom's basement playing video games, that's what you will become. If you find 5 people that are popular and getting dates and GFs and such, then you can learn from them and adopt their ways and become one of them. Find people that are living the life you want to lead and spend time with them,network with them, learn from them, become one of them. I wish I had ditched my nerd buddies sooner in my youth. When my little circle of physics nerds (my life looked like the TV show Big Bang Theory but without the girlfriends) and I started going our separate ways in life, my love life improved over night. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Camaro Guy Posted July 14, 2015 Author Share Posted July 14, 2015 Because guys that dont live their life around scoring chicks just couldnt possibly be cool or worth hanging out with right? What a complete self centered person. I'm sure women will just love being with a guy that is only using them to feed his new found rush/addiction. Having the balls to cold approach women, and try for a date is fine. Thats great that a guy can overcome and start doing that. But trashing people because they dont do it...so classy. How quick you are to forget that you were one of those people not long ago. Quoted myself from another thread. Yes, there is. First of all, these weren't "lifelong" friends. I live in a different city than I grew up in and none of them live around here. Secondly, I've only known these guys for 4 years, so around end/middle of college. So it wasn't hard to ditch them. Looking back, I did not ditch them for being unable to get laid. However, it was symptomatic of their overall world view. They had no passion for life. There was a "dead" look in their eyes. They would always make excuses for why they aren't where they want to be. They would always belittle and drag others down. They were afraid to push boundaries, not step on toes. And many others. Unfortunately, I absorbed these traits by osmosis. Now that I hang around people who see the bigger picture, I also see the bigger picture. It's a nice view. Hope you see it one day. Link to post Share on other sites
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