chelle21689 Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 As some of you know, my boyfriend of 4 years has a family that is extremely close and have a tight-knit circle. They are nice to me and I like hanging out with them but they often exclude me, I’m not sure if they even realize it. They’ll have “girls” dinners of the aunts, sisters, moms, grandma, female cousins, get pedicures, do walks at 5k events for charities, take photos without me, etc. I don’t expect to be invited every single time but sometimes would be nice. We currently live with his sisters so it’s not like we’re strangers or not close. We’re working on a plan to move out next year. We hang out often and I sometimes see them even when my boyfriend is out of town. I’ve been through family emergencies with them and help prep/clean for big events like his aunt’s engagement ceremony. His aunt asked me to be a bridesmaid last year but it turns out all the women are in it except me because they had to cut down on the bridal/groom party. We took family photos for their ceremony and it’s sad cuz it took the groom-to-be (the non-blood) to tell me I should get in the photo. Some of you might remember his mom used to do “family” only dinners where no spouses/significant others were invited. I expressed how I felt to my bf, I’m not sure if he said anything to them but things changed and he always made sure that I was welcomed to come or sometimes don’t even go and make sure we do our own thing. So that was taken care of. Since he took care of that issue, should I tell him that the women of his family make me feel excluded? Should I just suck it up? My cousin suggests I take action and plan a girls day to make an effort or let them know it’s ok to invite me without my bf. Anyone has a take on this? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 I was going to say you have to realize you are only a GF, granted a 4 year live in GF but not family nonetheless. Then I read where they do dinners without spouses sometimes. That seems odd too me & I don't know if you will be able to change that thinking under the circumstances. I'd ask your BF about it Have you considered hosting a girls' night? Maybe if you break the ice that way they will include you next time. Do your thing & during the activity mention how much fun you are having & say that you'd love to accompany them next time they do something. See what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
Author chelle21689 Posted July 1, 2015 Author Share Posted July 1, 2015 No one else is married in the younger generation of women but I mean, the lady married to the uncle isn't invited because they don't really like her. I don't see it changing even if we were married to be honest. MAYBE if I bore a child of blood relation to them. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts