raspberry.12 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Hi Unsure where to post this thread so I posted here. A few years ago, my wedding was cancelled. I was hopeless and of course didn't want to be in any relationship as the pain was still there. 4 months later, there were 2 guys who had crushes on me and both of them told me that they wanted to be with me, started relationship with me. One guy (called him A) I knew it a year back and one guy (called him B) I got introduced by a friend. For some reasons or stupid me, I somehow had more feeling for A than B, even though comparing jobs/age/personality, the B guy was better. Also, the A guy knew me and my previously relationship plus my cancelled wedding so he said he understood me, wanted to take care of me blah blah blah. A month later I chose the A guy that I had more feeling for, we started going out for a month, however, I needed to take business trip intertstate for 3 weeks and during that 3 weeks, there was little to no contact from him (the guy I chose), and later on I found out from Facebook that he had another girl . They took photos together. I confronted him and he admitted due to some reasons, he couldn't be with me anymore blah blah blah. I was so angry and I felt I was left behind another time. So I decided I didn't want to be in any relationship as my trust for guys went back to Zero again. The B was still asking me out, and I decided to tell him that I didn't want to be in love anymore (I didn't say the reason: previous cancelled wedding plus this new guy), I just said it was my own issue and couldn't get over it and hope we could still be friends. He said all right and he was nice to me. Then I had all the other family issues that I needed to solve so I lost contact with the B guy about 7 months. When I had everything under control and my feeling back to normal (to be able to start new relationship) I contacted the B guy again and we chatted as friends, I found out he had his girlfriend already, which made me a bit sad. But it was my fault back then, I didn't accept him. He just got married last month. I felt happy for him and as the same time, I felt sorry for myself as I had chance to be happily married or with someone who was willing to take care of me but I missed the chance. About the A guy, also 6 months later, he came back and said he and that girl broke up but to me, no more chance for him. I ignored all comms from him completely. I didn't even want to be his friend. I'm having hard feeling plus regret as to why I didn't think about the B guy before. Or maybe it's just my personal sake that if I accepted him last time, I would be the bride again. I'm feeling so bad and just want to share here. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Just because B married the woman he dated after you rejected him, doesn't mean you & he would have made it down the aisle. In fact at the time you met A & B you weren't really ready for a new relationship. You were still grieving the loss of your relationship / engagement. Take the fact that you attracted both A & B shows that you can attract me. The fact that B got married shows you attract substantial guys. Those are positive things. Now that time has passed, you are healthier, you can move forward. Hang on to that. Link to post Share on other sites
barcode88 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 (edited) I've had a similar experience. I went on a couple dates with Girl A who was marriage material, really had her **** together, she was cute and funny and very affectionate. She really had the hots for me, we worked together at Target, and when I asked her out she quit and told me later that she was telling herself for a long time that if I had ever asked her out she would finally quit working there (she had another full time M-F 9-5 job). Then there was Girl B who was a trainwreck and had baggage galore, but she was smoking hot, huge boobs, and liked to party. Guess what I did at young 22? Yup... Went for Girl B. Then afterwards Girl A dated another guy and they JUST got married recently -_- lol As for Girl B, ended up being nothing but games and bull****, and eventually found out she was cheating on me. I can relate OP. Edited March 31, 2015 by barcode88 Link to post Share on other sites
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