PJKino Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 Why Women Need To Start Asking Men Out?Because Men Have No Balls Talk about delusional and entitled 1 Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 Why Women Need To Start Asking Men Out?Because Men Have No Balls Talk about delusional and entitled I'm going to assume this woman isn't expecting any guy with a modem to ask her out. She makes a few salient points, but they are buried in the midst of so much insulting condescension it's hard to see them. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 While I don't like the tone of the article, there are definitely points that I have experienced. I ask men out (unsuccessfully) because sitting around waiting for men to do so doesn't work. So I definitely understand the notion that women have to make more moves. The issuse is that then when the woman makes a move, he is turned off by it and doesn't want her anyway. Total failure on my part. Then there's the "always looking for something better" bit - almost always happened to me. The dude wanted a prettier, slimmer, smarter, etc. girl, and I was the settle. Then when that better girl came along, BOOM, he was gone... nothing makes a girl feel like an ogre like being left for a much better girl. Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 I'm confused here, who do you think is delusional? The author? Women? Men? I think the author has a point. The women's movement has been going on since like what, the 60's? And, unfortunately, women with a "feminist" mentality have given birth to men and have sought out weak husbands. And, what do we get? Weak men....perhaps what we are seeing now a days out there (this generation). (1) Men raised by dominant and/or feminist women are gonna be raised to be scared of women. (2) Top that with the women's movement teaching women to go out there and "get their's" Combine the two (1 and 2) and you have men who are being turned into scared, lazy, boys. They just are sitting back and waiting for women to make the moves. I mean, if you were a guy and women are just throwing themselves after you - why would you get off your duff to pursue anyone? But thing is, all of this still is fighting biology. Even "if/when" the women pursue, the guy will go along with it for a while and even be flattered...BUT, he reverts back to his biology where cuz he wasn't interested (cuz she did most of the pursuing), he eventually loses interest in her AND/OR we have women who end up marrying these guys and cheating on them cuz they see these guys as "beneath" them. So, I say "thanks" to the women's movement for f-ing it up for us...THANK YOU!!! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 While I don't like the tone of the article, there are definitely points that I have experienced. I ask men out (unsuccessfully) because sitting around waiting for men to do so doesn't work. So I definitely understand the notion that women have to make more moves. The issuse is that then when the woman makes a move, he is turned off by it and doesn't want her anyway. Total failure on my part. Then there's the "always looking for something better" bit - almost always happened to me. The dude wanted a prettier, slimmer, smarter, etc. girl, and I was the settle. Then when that better girl came along, BOOM, he was gone... nothing makes a girl feel like an ogre like being left for a much better girl. Well, what you're doing is my point about fighting biology. When a man's "interested" they will come to you. I think the article needs to be re-written. I mean, we women should give out "signals" of interest (i.e. smiling, gently touching him, showing our legs)...but, to flat out ask a guy out, for his number, chase him - all the things guys do - may get his attention for a while, but cuz he didn't pursue you (and really wasn't into you) it won't last for long. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 She has some points about moms and being afraid, but lordy she's a rude beeyotch, 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 You can just feel the bitterness and condescension jumping out from the page. Blame the ones who treat men like sexual predators simply for speaking to a woman. We have the kind of society that a small but very loud and vocal minority of women have always wanted. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 Cool chick, nice decor, got the phone, Caifornia tanktop. Oh, the article If anywhere near accurate, whoa times have changed. Don't see any signs of the 'must approach' in my demographic, so can breathe sigh of relief. Balls intact. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 (edited) (1) Men raised by dominant and/or feminist women are gonna be raised to be scared of women. (2) Top that with the women's movement teaching women to go out there and "get their's" I was raised by probably the most dominant woman in my town. Went from divorced housewife to town council/real estate company/millionaire. She was extremely non caring, really tough on you and as dominant and feminist as you can get. Not all that different from the Mom in Futurama. ha ha ha I had a sister too. I turned out not afraid of women, but way, way more comfortable around them than men. I still don't get men. (I'm a guy). At first, growing up, I had lots of friends that were girls where I'd be the only guy around. Platonic friends. I also had snowboarding and skateboarding buddirs, butI didn't have to relate...i just had to skate. Later, in college, I found that y ability to relate well to women... got me womn. Lots of them. I still had a huge crew of female friends, but could pretty much get any girl I put my mind to getting. While other guys struggled with being nervous or not knowing what to say to these mysterious creatures, I just had fun with them and they went for me. Same is true to this day. I can still get anyone I put my mind to getting. No joke. I still have a big group of female friends too. Just a counter point that being raised by a very strong female doesn't make all of us scared of women. It did the exact opposite for me. Edited March 28, 2015 by loveweary11 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 Well, what you're doing is my point about fighting biology. When a man's "interested" they will come to you. I think the article needs to be re-written. I mean, we women should give out "signals" of interest (i.e. smiling, gently touching him, showing our legs)...but, to flat out ask a guy out, for his number, chase him - all the things guys do - may get his attention for a while, but cuz he didn't pursue you (and really wasn't into you) it won't last for long. I suppose the question is whether my signals are lost on them, or if they saw them and just weren't interested, and I was the dunderhead to ignore his ignoring of my signals, make a move, and get shot down. I literally have no idea how any of it is supposed to work. It's like a dance or something, and I know none of the moves! So I start doing some odd jig in hopes that it will suffice, and god no, it doesn't suffice! lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 I mean... it's not as if men who aren't interested are gonna acknowledge the woman's signals... "Hey, I saw your signals, but I'm not interested, so you can stop giving signals now. Thanks!" - yeah. there's none of that.... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PJKino Posted March 28, 2015 Author Share Posted March 28, 2015 (edited) I'm confused here, who do you think is delusional? The author? Women? Men? I think the author has a point. The women's movement has been going on since like what, the 60's? And, unfortunately, women with a "feminist" mentality have given birth to men and have sought out weak husbands. And, what do we get? Weak men....perhaps what we are seeing now a days out there (this generation). (1) Men raised by dominant and/or feminist women are gonna be raised to be scared of women. (2) Top that with the women's movement teaching women to go out there and "get their's" Combine the two (1 and 2) and you have men who are being turned into scared, lazy, boys. They just are sitting back and waiting for women to make the moves. I mean, if you were a guy and women are just throwing themselves after you - why would you get off your duff to pursue anyone? But thing is, all of this still is fighting biology. Even "if/when" the women pursue, the guy will go along with it for a while and even be flattered...BUT, he reverts back to his biology where cuz he wasn't interested (cuz she did most of the pursuing), he eventually loses interest in her AND/OR we have women who end up marrying these guys and cheating on them cuz they see these guys as "beneath" them. So, I say "thanks" to the women's movement for f-ing it up for us...THANK YOU!!! Oh please first off plenty of men do approach they just don't happen to approach her and with her bitterness I can see why. Secondly why demean men who don't approach? Some of us are shy or socially awkward or have anxiety....if that's not your kind of guy fine but it's kinda creepy how women like the author and you seem to think all men should act one way and I'f they don't fit the guidelines of what a man is they're worthless. Lastly I know this is shocking to some women but men's main job is not to make things easier on women in the dating scene which that's all this is about.. The fact she mentions lavish dates and free drinks as her expectations shows you how delusional and entitled she is Edited March 28, 2015 by PJKino 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Timshel Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 No, I entirely disagree. Men ask women out and approach women every day, all the time. I will get beaten up I suppose but this is absolutely media hogwash. Propaganda. None of this rings true for me and actually seems really silly. Ladies, what kind of crap about men are you buying into? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 Oh please first off plenty of men do approach they just don't happen to approach her and with her bitterness I can see why. Secondly why demean men who don't approach? Some of us are shy or socially awkward or have anxiety....if that's not your kind of guy fine but it's kinda creepy how women like the author and you seem to think all men should act one way and I'f they don't fit the guidelines of what a man is they're worthless. Lastly I know this is shocking to some women but men's main job is not to make things easier on women in the dating scene which that's all this is about.. The fact she mentions lavish dates and free drinks weed her expectations shows you how delusional and entitled she is Welcome to the feminist mentality....^^ They want to be "in charge", and have "equality", but still expect men to be "old fashioned", "traditional", etc. So, chase her marry her, spend money on wining/dining her...heck, buy her a home and work your butt off. But guess what? No cooking, cleaning, chores, much less sex from her. She's got better things to do than be your "maid", "housekeeper", "cook", "daycare/childcare provider", "prostitute". Can't have it both ways women...Either you chase/pursue guys or not. If guys aren't pursuing you "women", then don't get upset about it and call them "ball-less" or whatever. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 No, I entirely disagree. Men ask women out and approach women every day, all the time. I will get beaten up I suppose but this is absolutely media hogwash. Propaganda. None of this rings true for me and actually seems really silly. Ladies, what kind of crap about men are you buying into? Agreed...^^ I think this article is just another stab at humiliating and demeaning men...typical femenazi rubbish. For all we know, these women who aren't getting "asked out" are interested in guys who aren't interested in them, and think that if every guy doesn't get a hard-on for them, that the guy is gay and should be banished/shamed. If this article succeeds in making men think it's their job to ask out every woman just cuz she has a vagina, and if he doesn't then something's wrong with him, this just caters to the feminist mentality that if a guy doesn't do what a particular woman wants - he's scum. So, why don't we start raping men if they don't want to have sex with us? I mean, we've gotta show them that "we" got what they need!!! 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 If you notice 99% of the women in the comments don't agree with her. As much as misandrists love to think so they don't speak for most women. There is a silent majority that don't despise anybody born with a penis. For too long we have let the male bashers control the conversation on relations between men and women. Also how much do you want to bet that if the wrong guy dared to speak to her she would mercilessly tear him apart? 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Timshel Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 Exactly, this is straight out of Cosmo or some equally not thoughtful/Kardashian loving magazine. Then men wonder. This is ridiculous. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 I've made the first move on guys before, but if I do and they don't then take the bull by the horns and start acting like a man instead of a scared little boy, I got tired of them pretty quick. Making the first move works best if the woman is okay if it turns out to be just sex, because some guys will devalue her for hitting on them or think she's a slut. The scared guys, it doesn't make them any more likely to man up, in my experience. If anything, being forward just scares them more and makes them more intimidated of you and then if they get their voice, it's likely to be prodding around trying to find out how many men you've been with because they're afraid they won't measure up or are judgy about it. I don't know why anyone would want a guy who was that fearful, but if they do, I'd think the best approach would just be to compliment them on something or ask them about something you know they are interested in and seeing if they can meet you halfway or not. As you've seen on this board, even that is no guarantee they can move past Square 1 without being paralyzed, but it's the best shot at it. I have had success with just finding good reasons to talk to a guy and then get to know them, but they have to sit up and pay attention right away and be aggressively interested, or I wouldn't keep it up. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 (edited) Ok, do I have to use my personal experience here? My recent crush dates other women. He has NO fear of approaching them. YET when he sees me he runs and hides. So, even "shy" guys can come out of their shell when they meet someone they wanna be with. In my opinion, he reaches out to women that don't intimidate him. I admit that I am a strong woman and perhaps he's afraid that he actually might like what I have and won't wanna let it go and I might break his heart. Same way that I felt about him...I asked myself "why would a guy like him want me? is this a joke or gas lighting or something?" So, sometimes I, as big and bad as I am, get giddy and shy around him. So, I see both of us afraid of being vulnerable to each other. I also see myself as not fitting into his "world" - his family and friends would never approve. So, again, I'm not a match for him....has nothing to do with him being a wussie, shy, or whatever. So, just cuz a guy doesn't have the balls to approach "YOU" doesn't mean that there's something wrong with "YOU" and/or he's a wussie or something. Thing is, when he finds what he's looking for - even if it's someone who isn't as bad-azz as you, fact is that's what he wants, that's what he feels comfortable with. So, if you see that it's many of guys who are afraid to approach you...then maybe it's time to look at yourself. Is it your looks? Is it your attitude? Is it where you go to meet them (i.e. online, church, bars). But still, IMO, there "is" a shift in the dating world and men are becoming lazy and just sit back and let women do all the work...but even with this change, trust me, when they meet a woman they wanna make "the one", they won't sit back and make her do a thing...they WILL step up - it's in their nature. Edited March 29, 2015 by Gloria25 Link to post Share on other sites
bubbaganoosh Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 Could it be that the man she's reaching out to isn't interested in her? I found out being a guy with a lot of years (67) behind him that guys get turned down a lot by women. It's almost a right of passage into dating. Do we feel bad when that happens? Yeah but we have this way of saving face to our friends. We lie. We say Meh, she wasn't so hot to begin with even though were drooling like crazy because she was. But In my younger years, I've had on a few occasions had some woman come on to me and if they weren't the type of woman I didn't like or want to be with I politely bowed out. Women don't like being turned down. It's not in their make up because for eons they have been pursued by the guy and when the tables are turned, it could be a bitter pill to swallow especially if your not used to the rejection like guys have had to endure for lord only knows how long. Not to mention that in today's society a wrong word or approach can land someone in deep trouble so that plays a large part in it. Maybe I'm old fashion and my ways are out of date but I liked the old way better. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Price2Play Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 I was approached right after my divorce about 4yrs ago. Boy was the timing just right!! Sweet sweet latina girl. She was no longer happy with her current bf at the time. I was not made aware of this until much later. She dumped him of course, I just kind of shrugged it off ok kool. Man she treated me like a king. Sorry Gloria but she did cook & clean and sex was amazing. Damn she could cook too! I think I gained 10lbs. Not one time did I ask her to clean ethier, I would tell her to stop! Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 Welcome to the feminist mentality....^^ They want to be "in charge", and have "equality", but still expect men to be "old fashioned", "traditional", etc. So, chase her marry her, spend money on wining/dining her...heck, buy her a home and work your butt off. But guess what? No cooking, cleaning, chores, much less sex from her. She's got better things to do than be your "maid", "housekeeper", "cook", "daycare/childcare provider", "prostitute". Can't have it both ways women...Either you chase/pursue guys or not. If guys aren't pursuing you "women", then don't get upset about it and call them "ball-less" or whatever. I do look around and see a lot of women who shouldn't be single getting away with it. Like you, the fact there isn't a guy out there on the west coast worming his way into your life and slowly coaxing you out of that aversion to real intimacy you have and into bed kinda does show that maybe men in general do need a kick in the ass. =/ Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 Men don't approach me. I'm sorry to hear that the same happens to women in their 20's. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dichotomy Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 (edited) I agree in part with some other posters here. It might be extreme to say the feminist movement made men weak, but I would say that we got the message to stop being being sexist pigs - respect and treat women lightly. At the same time women were encouraged to be....sexist pigs. Women were taught - go after what you want in all areas - including sex. Back in the day when dating - I tried my hand at approaching women and seemed to not have a ton of success. Strangely however, I was approached by enough other women to get dates and sex. I simply kind of shrugged my shoulders and said - well this is easier to let the "empowered women" do the picking so I will stop the approaching. Again not sure why this is - even in on line dating I knew women with tons of men sending them requests, which they ignored, but they would reach out to me, or other men they liked, for a date. Again I just figured women like (and have the power) to do the choosing. So ok you choose, its easier for me. Along this line - I have noticed (having one kid just out of high school) - is that the girls are more aggressive sexually then ever - almost competitive among each other "get a boy" ...and the decent looking (not even hot) boys simply don't have to do much to get lucky - very little dating or pursuing girls. However for the more moderate or slightly traditional girls - even good looking ones - they can't get a boy, because they would prefer to be dated or pursued and are not willing to simply put out at a party for a boy they might fancy. The boys are like "why put in the effort with you?" Edited March 29, 2015 by dichotomy 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Male Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 (edited) I suppose the question is whether my signals are lost on them, or if they saw them and just weren't interested, and I was the dunderhead to ignore his ignoring of my signals, make a move, and get shot down. I literally have no idea how any of it is supposed to work. It's like a dance or something, and I know none of the moves! So I start doing some odd jig in hopes that it will suffice, and god no, it doesn't suffice! lol The problem with this is the perception of the signal. Women are usually very nervous in such situations. So in their mind they see their signal as a huge billboard shouting look at me....when in reality its more like a post-it note that the guy can barely read. Most "signals" women use are much more subtle than they realize. Look at how many times people give advice to men or women to just "smile" and be talkative. How is that a signal?? People smile and talk to me all the time, but its doesnt mean they want to date me. In my personal real-life situations, I have heard more women complain about getting hit on too much, rather than complain about not getting enough attention. As a single guy, I literally dont know when or where I'm "allowed" to approach a woman. Because all I ever hear is that they dont want approached at any store, gas station, library, gym, sporting event, bank, bar, club, wedding, church, park, festival, car show, restaurant, museum, etc, etc. Edited March 29, 2015 by Male 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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