d0nnivain Posted January 30, 2015 Share Posted January 30, 2015 DH & I just came home from a lovely cruise. One thing bugged us though. There were a lot of kids on this trip. More than I expected for this time of year. Anyway, every day in the late afternoon this male passenger who appeared to be in his mid to late 30s would dress up in a Spiderman costume & wander around the pool area where all the kids were, pretending to be the super hero. He climb over the hot tub & pool railings, stand on chairs etc. Many parents seemed to think he was part of the ship's entertainment staff. This cruise line offers Nickeloedeon characters on board but they always had a ship's nametag. In the evening we'd see him in a full suit on a casual ship, with a name tag that he made himself walking around with a LED light up "ice cube" blinking in his drink. I could deal with the suit, name tag & ice cube & chalk them up to wanting adult attention. Not my style but c'est la vie. The costume thing with the kids struck us as creepy, & made us wonder if the guy was a pedophile. The only time I saw him touch a child was when the parent would push the kid at him for a photo but even then his hands were visible & nothing was untoward about his movements. Am I being narrow-minded here? Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 30, 2015 Share Posted January 30, 2015 If he had no ID and every one of the other workers or entertainers and staff did, I'd have reported him and just found out if they knew who he was or not. I cannot even imagine taking a cruise and having to put up with people in cartoon costumes and that many kids. I've heard that these days, cruises are all geared that way, at least the ones out of U.S. ports. There was a time cruises were a mostly adult activity. Sad. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted January 30, 2015 Share Posted January 30, 2015 No, I think you were being hot wired and cautious. In other words aware to check in case anything happened. He could well just be a normal guy out for just a smile but you never know. I would have been the same. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 30, 2015 Share Posted January 30, 2015 I'd have been annoyed there was so much ruckus around the pool area and probably complained about that as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Author d0nnivain Posted January 30, 2015 Author Share Posted January 30, 2015 There wasn't a lot of ruckus. It was odd that there were so many kids. Apparently a large number orthodox Jewish schools had winter break because they don't take Christmas so there were more kids then we were expecting. I have actually rarely encountered a rude kid on a cruise. I got a kick out of over hearing a discussion between 2 boys who couldn't have been more than 10 because one was a platinum cruiser & the other diamond. Oh the horrors for the kid with the "lower" status. I did ask a few crew member about it (nobody high ranking). Two didn't know what I was talking about. When I pointed the guy out to one all he said was passengers can do whatever they want. That staffer clearly didn't have enough clout to request that a passenger stop doing anything short of setting the ship on fire. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 That's alarming. With that policy, those ships are probably riddled with pedophiles. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Million.to.1 Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 I don't think you are being paranoid or narrow-minded, but you are speculating from the worst case scenario. I like (most) kids, I have none of my own yet, if ever. I work with kids. But I am a woman. If I was swanning around the pool as a fairy having fun with young ones.. would it bother you as much? Also, really it's nothing that asking him or talking to him couldn't have resolved. Maybe he was just having fun and didn't think about the fact that it could look a bit weird or dodgy to parents. Someone who has a led light ice cube in his drink seems like the kind of guy that doesn't get the opportunity much in real life to be a bit of a clown and joke around and kids always respond well to that kind of thing. Men can like hanging out with kids too. Kids are fun! kids don't care about stuff! Wanting a bit of that energy around is normal. It doesn't mean they are pedos. Why didn't you just have a chat with him? Ask him "are you a teacher? you seem to love being with the kids!" .. you may have received and answer like..."oh, i lost my wife and 2 kids in a car crash 3 years ago, and I miss them. Playing spiderman while on this holiday just makes me feel close to them again" Who really knows. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 (edited) I remember when my girls were young they went to the park with a friend...my friend was talking to another friend......and in this lack of supervision ...moments only......a man came up to the girls and tried to convince them to go home and play with him.....when my friend ran over......it was obvious the man has a mental disabil;it7y...age equivalent of a child and had wandered off maybe from his carers......he still had to be told no you cant do that......and he wandered off again...... now it might have been totally innocent......but it so could have not been totally innocent...and speaking from experience its better to be safe than sorry in regards to children and peedophiles.....i will say pedophiles are normally much more straight laced than out there.....at least the one i was unfortunate or fortunate to meet....was a pillar in the community..hard working.....fostered orphans and took them on day trips away from the orphanage with his wife....he never war batman suits...he wore sensible shoes and a work uniform..... better safe than sorry is my motto...normally...however....... pedophiles are really quite clever at remaining on the fringe of adult perception....it doesnt pay to be out there....not when you want kids to go with you and their parents to think its ok....the child actually finds out the pedophile before the adult has a clue..most pedophiles are caught .......through the admissions of a child...then they are investigated...err on the side of caution is always best but as i sadi pedos are not normally out there and visible...they know what they are doing.....they know it needs cover.....and not a spiderman suit by a random...only on tv is that coverable by years of practice of wearing funny suits...and workign with children knowing how they think feel and what they are likely to do...even then...justice is done.....years and years later...but it is done..............deb Edited January 31, 2015 by todreaminblue Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 (edited) Well, I don't think there's any doubt that the guy is a strange bird who will stop at nothing to get noticed... but based on what you wrote I also don't think there is any reason to suspect him of being a pedophile. That would assume that attention seeking correlates with pedophilia. It's more likely that an actual pedophile would try not to attract that kind of attention. I've only encountered two known pedophiles in real life (both in prison now). Neither exhibited any overt attention-seeking propensities. One was a friend of a family that my exW and I socialized with because they had daughters close to our daughter's age. This man was older, never married, a loner and a bit socially awkward. He was a teacher and managed a swimming pool in the summer. At one Kentucky Derby party the men stepped outside to drink liquor, smoke cigars see tell tall tales. This guy made a bit of an effort but just didn't fit in. Awhile later he rounded up the younger kids (all girls) and volunteered to take them to a nearby park (my daughter included). Nobody gave it a second thought. My intuition alerted me though and my first thought was that I should go along. I never consciously thought that he might be a pedophile... just a notion that another adult should go along. Then one of the older teen-aged kids ran to catch up and I was ok with that. My feeling was strong enough that if she hadn't gone I would've. It was a few years later that a woman came forward and accused him of having molested her many times more than ten years prior at the swimming pool. After she spoke out literally dozens more came forward and he was ultimately convicted and put away for life. That guy had been molesting children (pre-adolescent girls) for decades and nobody suspected because he blended in as a conservative, responsible man. That is one of a handful of incidents that caused me to understand that my intuition is pretty damn good and I should quit suppressing it. So, I think your intuition that Spiderman might be a pedophile is probably a more reliable indication than the fact that he's an attention whore. Edited January 31, 2015 by salparadise Link to post Share on other sites
Author d0nnivain Posted January 31, 2015 Author Share Posted January 31, 2015 I like (most) kids, I have none of my own yet, if ever. I work with kids. But I am a woman. If I was swanning around the pool as a fairy having fun with young ones.. would it bother you as much? Yeah, I'd wonder about you too. My narrow-mindness is equal opportunity. I hate that I think the worst but in this day & age you never know. But for the Spiderman costume, I probably wouldn't have noticed the led light in the drink or thought anything about it other than the guy likes gadgets or attention. Adult to adult . . . who cares? Have fun. Live & let live. The kids thing. . . . I don't know. Link to post Share on other sites
Author d0nnivain Posted January 31, 2015 Author Share Posted January 31, 2015 So, I think your intuition that Spiderman might be a pedophile is probably a more reliable indication than the fact that he's an attention whore. I hope so. Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 I don't think you are being paranoid or narrow-minded, but you are speculating from the worst case scenario. I like (most) kids, I have none of my own yet, if ever. I work with kids. But I am a woman. If I was swanning around the pool as a fairy having fun with young ones.. would it bother you as much? Also, really it's nothing that asking him or talking to him couldn't have resolved. Maybe he was just having fun and didn't think about the fact that it could look a bit weird or dodgy to parents. Someone who has a led light ice cube in his drink seems like the kind of guy that doesn't get the opportunity much in real life to be a bit of a clown and joke around and kids always respond well to that kind of thing. Men can like hanging out with kids too. Kids are fun! kids don't care about stuff! Wanting a bit of that energy around is normal. It doesn't mean they are pedos. Why didn't you just have a chat with him? Ask him "are you a teacher? you seem to love being with the kids!" .. you may have received and answer like..."oh, i lost my wife and 2 kids in a car crash 3 years ago, and I miss them. Playing spiderman while on this holiday just makes me feel close to them again" Who really knows. Well, you're a woman. It's different. We had to create a whole institution around getting men to stay with women when they had kids. It's not even natural for a guy to stay around his own kids, let alone pay a lot of money to go on a cruise and then spend that time seeking the attention of children. If he's not a guy who's molested a kid then he's at the very least got suppressed tendencies for that kind of thing. And anyone who see's that kind of thing should be suspicious. Link to post Share on other sites
Million.to.1 Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 Well, you're a woman. It's different. We had to create a whole institution around getting men to stay with women when they had kids. It's not even natural for a guy to stay around his own kids, let alone pay a lot of money to go on a cruise and then spend that time seeking the attention of children. If he's not a guy who's molested a kid then he's at the very least got suppressed tendencies for that kind of thing. And anyone who see's that kind of thing should be suspicious. I know many men that would disagree with you Gaius. And your definition of "natural"! It is not something I care to hear more about. You have jumped to some pretty big conclusions about this guys past and his intentions based on, well, not much. Thanks for the response to my post, but I really do not want to engage in conversation with you... in general, about anything. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Haydn Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 Well, you're a woman. It's different. We had to create a whole institution around getting men to stay with women when they had kids. It's not even natural for a guy to stay around his own kids, let alone pay a lot of money to go on a cruise and then spend that time seeking the attention of children. If he's not a guy who's molested a kid then he's at the very least got suppressed tendencies for that kind of thing. And anyone who see's that kind of thing should be suspicious. It`s very natural for `most` blokes to stay around their own kids. DON, probably just a bloke having fun and not what you think. Of course i would keep an eye on my kids with strangers. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author d0nnivain Posted January 31, 2015 Author Share Posted January 31, 2015 DON, probably just a bloke having fun and not what you think. Of course i would keep an eye on my kids with strangers. I want to believe that but it simply struck me as odd. I was I guess more surprised that the cruise line didn't do more to make it clear that this guy was not part of their entertainment staff. Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 Its weird....Just like there is a guy around here that dresses up like the lion from the Wizard of Oz...He attends many of the local events...Id say the guy has issues..Plus, he must have poor vision, because no man that has his physique should ever wear a leotard or whatever the hell he wears...Its just gross as hell... On another note, while Id never don a Superhero outfit, I love spending time with my daughter...Its completely natural....She doesnt think its weird and I am like a kid sometimes anyway, so we get along... TFY Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 I know many men that would disagree with you Gaius. And your definition of "natural"! It is not something I care to hear more about. You have jumped to some pretty big conclusions about this guys past and his intentions based on, well, not much. Thanks for the response to my post, but I really do not want to engage in conversation with you... in general, about anything. Well, then don't engage with me then. I don't mind talking while you just listen. It`s very natural for `most` blokes to stay around their own kids. Even with a large portion of our country still influenced by religion I think we're already up to something like 1 in 3 kids without a father. The one's that do want to stay are the exception, not the norm. =/ Maybe this guy escaped from prison and decided to take a cruise. Same spiderman costume and everything. Boston doctor gets 21 years for plan to rape young Alaska boy - Home - Fairbanks Daily News-Miner Link to post Share on other sites
StanMusial Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 How did you know it was the same guy? Doesn't spiderman wear a mask? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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