farmerjohn1324 Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 In general, what does a guy have to do, or what do you have to know before you want to have sex with him? Back when I was in my early twenties, it didn't seem like there was much in the way, but as I get older, girls seem to be more hesitant and need to see more first. Link to post Share on other sites
aussietigerwolf Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 that the girl is seen as more then a pump it and dump it scenario. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author farmerjohn1324 Posted September 2, 2014 Author Share Posted September 2, 2014 To me, that would mean wanting to have a "relationship" with someone, which at this point in my life means having children. But there must also be qualities in a guy that you must like too. For example, not just anyone can come up to you and say they want more than just a "pump it and dump it," because you have to like them back. Can you name any of these qualities? Link to post Share on other sites
Candy_Pants Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 You are majorly putting the cart before the horse. Slow down buck-o. Get a date. Get to know her. Then you can worry about sex. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
frankvega Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 Ok how old are you??? Are you even old enough to date? When intimacy happens it happens there is no qualifying feature or protocol that one must meet first in order for that to happen, You can be a complete looser and if she likes you enough it will happen, just like you can be the next Justin Bieber and if she is not into you she will not give you the time of day. Link to post Share on other sites
Author farmerjohn1324 Posted September 2, 2014 Author Share Posted September 2, 2014 (edited) I'm not worried about sex. I'm worried about reproduction. Just to clarify. I'm a child? I remember one time being in the ICU with a broken neck/back wondering if I would ever walk again. But I guess I'm a child. You're the one who think Justin Bieber is cool. Sure there are qualifying features. For example: intelligence, a good career or at least financial stability, hygiene. And there are disqualifying features: being a penniless, homeless, toothless bum. Some girls (at this age) rule out guys that still do drugs, some girls rule out guys that have ever been arrested. Even more: many girls like a guy with humor, the majority will put honesty at the top of their list. If a guy lies to them once, they will say "goodbye." There are many qualifying and disqualifying things that would cause someone to even want or not want to get close to someone in the first place. Edited September 2, 2014 by farmerjohn1324 Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 Above anything, I want to feel safe with that guy and know I can trust him - at the very least to the extend that I know I can have sex with him, not like sharing my darkest secrets or stuff like that. I don't need financial security from his side (although of course, he should be capable of standing on his own feet; I'm not the 2nd mom). It's just the whole package that has to be alright. I can't even give you any tips on who that would be for me; some guys were interesting because they were funny and always knew something to say, others were rather hesitant but I still liked them despite their rather serious attitude (perhaps because they seem more reliable this way? Dunno). Just find your match. She/They are out there for sure. Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 I will be blunt. Either 1. LTR potential or 2. Insanely hot guy No 2. rarely happens but it's usually with guys that I find extremly attractive (and they are objectively highly attractive too) and I know there won't be a relationship yet I don't care 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Absinthe Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 As we get older I think we just become a little more...discerning. Or mellowed out, I don't know. I'm 26, if that counts for anything. Part of the reason I'm going through a dry spell right now is that nobody I've dated in the last 12 months has got my gears grinding, so to speak. I'm not sure exactly why this is however! Link to post Share on other sites
serial muse Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 To me, that would mean wanting to have a "relationship" with someone, which at this point in my life means having children. But there must also be qualities in a guy that you must like too. For example, not just anyone can come up to you and say they want more than just a "pump it and dump it," because you have to like them back. Can you name any of these qualities? Sorry, I'm confused - you're saying that other than one-night stands, you don't want to have sex with someone until you want kids with them? Am I reading that right? Because if so, then I don't think "what does a woman need to know about a guy before having sex" is the right question. Seems more like you'd be asking what you need to know about the prospective mother of your children. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
OwMyEyeball Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 To me, that would mean wanting to have a "relationship" with someone, which at this point in my life means having children. But there must also be qualities in a guy that you must like too. For example, not just anyone can come up to you and say they want more than just a "pump it and dump it," because you have to like them back. Can you name any of these qualities? Judging by the other threads you've started on similar topics on the theme of "what do women like/want" I'd agree with another poster in saying: SLOW DOWN You're over-analyzing the entire situation and trying to get relationship tips at a time in your life where you're better of going into dates with an open mind, an open heart and few expectations other than enjoying each other's company. Concern yourself with enjoying yourself, which I suppose should mean don't concern yourself with anything. Don't make the mistake so many of us do and think yourself into a corner. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mopparon Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 To me, that would mean wanting to have a "relationship" with someone, which at this point in my life means having children. But there must also be qualities in a guy that you must like too. For example, not just anyone can come up to you and say they want more than just a "pump it and dump it," because you have to like them back. Can you name any of these qualities? Each of the women on here naming specific qualities that they like in a guy isn't going to help you in your specific encounters and on your specific dates I think, because every woman is different and looks for different qualities in a guy. Sure there are general qualities that the majority of women look for in a guy but you've listed most of them yourself anyway >> Sure there are qualifying features. For example: intelligence, a good career or at least financial stability, hygiene. And there are disqualifying features: being a penniless, homeless, toothless bum. Some girls (at this age) rule out guys that still do drugs, some girls rule out guys that have ever been arrested. Even more: many girls like a guy with humor, the majority will put honesty at the top of their list. If a guy lies to them once, they will say "goodbye." There are many qualifying and disqualifying things that would cause someone to even want or not want to get close to someone in the first place. Link to post Share on other sites
me85 Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 Chemistry. If the chemistry's there, then go for it. If they aren't ready for sex, then wait. It's really that simple. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 I was never one for one night stands personally, so all men I've slept with have either been boyfriends or at least men I've known for a period of time. I slept with them because I was sexually attracted to them and had gone out with them or hung out with them enough to trust them and feel comfortable enough to have sex. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts