Treated like a child?

[nbd03]

So basically I'm a 23 year old woman who still feels like a 14 year old girl. Now the issue I have is that my boyfriend is absolutely amazing and treats me wonderfully. We have been together for a very Long time and have a great relationship, and I know he love me very much. The issue is sometimes I feel like he can be a bit hypocritical and make me feel as if I'm a little girl. Mainly this revolves around valid points (such as he HATES it when I have a cigarette when we are out for the night at a party or casually smoke weed). I know he only feels this way because he cares and I appreciate that, but what really irritates me is he does both of these things regularly! I hate being out with a group of friends and feeling like a baby. The truth is I am a very responsible person with a good job and I feel like I make relatively good decisions, however if I decide to get high on a Friday night (with my boyfriend and his friends, mind you) then I don't feel like I should feel guilty. Also, this is even more annoying because I DO look about 17 and I have to deal with looking young in every aspect of my life, so that makes it worse comin from him. I'm unsure how to bring this up with him without making a fight as I've tried before and usually we argue... Am I a bad person for feeling this way?

[Got it]

So basically I'm a 23 year old woman who still feels like a 14 year old girl. Now the issue I have is that my boyfriend is absolutely amazing and treats me wonderfully. We have been together for a very Long time and have a great relationship, and I know he love me very much. The issue is sometimes I feel like he can be a bit hypocritical and make me feel as if I'm a little girl. Mainly this revolves around valid points (such as he HATES it when I have a cigarette when we are out for the night at a party or casually smoke weed). I know he only feels this way because he cares and I appreciate that, but what really irritates me is he does both of these things regularly! I hate being out with a group of friends and feeling like a baby. The truth is I am a very responsible person with a good job and I feel like I make relatively good decisions, however if I decide to get high on a Friday night (with my boyfriend and his friends, mind you) then I don't feel like I should feel guilty. Also, this is even more annoying because I DO look about 17 and I have to deal with looking young in every aspect of my life, so that makes it worse comin from him. I'm unsure how to bring this up with him without making a fight as I've tried before and usually we argue... Am I a bad person for feeling this way?

 

Since hypocrisy is on my top list of "hated attributes" I agree with you. Next time he says something I would laugh at him and tell him as soon as he actually walks the talk you two can discuss it.

 

I would take great issue being talked down to and do not find that to be effective communication. I would calmly address this with him. You can't control is actions but you can control yours. You could suggest couples counseling to have an independent third party there to help guide you two through this.

 

I have always looked younger than my years, I sympathize with you on that, but I command respect and I will bring a very logical argument to counter any unfair claims.