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can a guy be sexually satisfied with one woman for the rest of his life?


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hello,

 

my fiance and i are very close and can tell each other almost anything.. the thing is, i am worried that if i mention what i am insecure about.. well, he will see how insecure i am and it will be a major turn off.

see, my guy and i lost our virginities to each other, and have been monogamous for that past two years ( we are now engaged). sexually, we have only ever been with each other. we are young( he's 22 and i'm 21).

i just remember, about a year ago, when he was telling me how he was when he was in high school.. he was shy and a bit of a "nerd". he then proceeded to "jokingly" tell me that he wished he hadn't been that way cuz he should have experimented and not been so shy with the ladies.

this is what i was afraid of.. i love him too death, and i want to be with him, but recalling him saying that to me, makes me worried that he will end up regretting settling down with his "first". i know there is no going back.. i can't rightly say, "go and sow your wild oats, and when you've had enough, you can come back to me and we'll settle down."

i don't know.. i hear men love, need, and want a variety of sexual partners... but i can't be all the things he's missed... i can only be one person.. and i'm afraid that his not having "experimented" may lead to him saying, "ah, screw it.. i'm going to do this" ten years down the line. i'm just concerned this may have an impact on his fidelity. please help.

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You actually have a valid point.

 

However, this point is also blended in mutual love and respect. I suspect the other two are totally capable of removing your fear on the valid point and giving you BOTH a mutually satisfying relationship.

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Some feel the need to learn with other people, perfect it, and find someone nice to settle down with.

 

I plan on having sex with one person, learning with that person, perfecting it, and forming experiences that don't include the variety of partners charecteristic of youth. While I may be deprived of the experiences that some swear by, I'll also be deprived of the insecurity that comes with an obsessive inquiry into past lovers, or the destruction that follows infidelity. I'm not expecting to jump into it perfectly, I'm willing to learn.

 

I think that it takes a true willingness. You don't need to silently brew over this, talk to him--tell him what's wrong with you, explain why his past comment makes you nervous. Let him do the talking, you need to feel comfortable that he's willing to learn, and supress the stupid notion of oat-sowing.

 

From that point, it's about trust. As long as you both maintain a healthy level of intimacy, trust, and communication, you shouldn't have problems, you just shouldn't.

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If you have to ask this question, the seed of doubt is already planted in you. So my answer for you would be no. There are people who can be satisfied for a lifetime, others not. It just depends on the person, their maturity and stability and how into sex as an Olympic event they are.

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A reasonable concern. Why don't you talk to him about this. The discussion might just bring you even closer.

 

Personally, I think that two people have the potential to satisfy each other for life, particularly if they communicate their needs, desires, curiosities, etc. You will evolve and grow, as individuals, and as a couple, and so will your sex life-- it's forever a work in progress, not a static thing at all. THough if we neglect it, it can feel so.

 

Best wishes

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If a person is completely satisfied with the lover they have, why would they look elsewhere?

 

Sex is sex, sure there are some differences in sexual performance but it is basically all the same.

 

I would much rather be settled down with a woman I loved then to go out and "sow my wild oats"; that is a miserable lonely road.

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Of course he can. will he go through periods of temptation ? yes. Boredom? yes. Pleasure? yes.

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My best friend told this to me on this very topic.

 

He's getting married. He's 23. He'll only be with one woman for the rest of his life.

 

Whenever he gets the feeling or the thinking of what else is out there, wondering how it'd be, he jerks off to porn and the interest is gone.

 

Porn = evil? I think not.

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My guess is that I would be happy with Salma Hayek for several lifetimes but, sadly, I probably won't have her for even five minutes. My life is ruined.

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My guess is that I would be happy with Salma Hayek

 

Salma Hayek

PO Box 57593

Sherman Oaks,

CA 91403-2593

USA

 

c/o Ask The Dunst

Cruise Wagner Prod.

5555 Melrose Ave.

Los Angeles, CA 90038

USA

(shooting began in March - may be wrapped)

 

And may all your dreams come true!

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  • 1 month later...
lilmoma1973

[font=times new roman][/font][color=cyan][/color]

 

hey tony

i totally agree with you on that it all does depend on the person.. alot of people get bored with just one person but when im with someone im faithful to the very end and that is the way it should be ... :D

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dudesomewhere

answer: yes

probability: <10%

 

"i hear men love, need, and want a variety of sexual partners... "

nah, scummy people are like that...and that includes women. :p

 

settling down with your first(dual firsts)...what an awesome thought. What loser male/female would forego something that beautiful...azz :)

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...he will see how insecure i am and it will be a major turn off.

 

Being insecure all by itself is really not a turnoff. Everyone is insecure about something. Everyone gets insecure in their relationships. It's part of life. What can be a turnoff is how you handle it. The biggest turnoff for me is when someone tries to hide it, usually by overcompensating in some other area. When I see through that, I realize that I'm dealing with a person who needs to grow up and learn to be honest about their emotions.

 

Men definitely can be happy in life with a single partner. But there is no way of knowing whether a 22 year old is going to be like that. The next 10 to 15 years will be interesting for you. It's worth the risk. Don't let this get in the way of your happy times together. This is the poster child for self-fulfilling prophecies.

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