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Should I tell an ex I'm dating someone new?


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writingmachine

My ex and I broke up two months ago. It ended on mutual terms, and we still talk off and on. Recently I have been seeing someone new and we are about to make our relationship official. I'm undecided if I should tell my ex or not.

 

Part of me thinks that my ex would be upset at me dating someone new. I'm not sure if he still has feelings for me or not, although I don't have feelings for him any longer, and I'm not sure if I should tell him or wait for him to ask me about my new relationship. I don't have any romantic interest in my ex, but I do care about his feelings. Should I tell him or just let it go?

 

Also, is two months too soon to be dating someone new? I feel my new boyfriend is not a rebound and we have more in common than my ex and I do, and I'm having a great time with him. I'm just big on etiquette with this sort of thing for some reason, even though I wouldn't care if my ex was seeing someone new.

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todreaminblue
My ex and I broke up two months ago. It ended on mutual terms, and we still talk off and on. Recently I have been seeing someone new and we are about to make our relationship official. I'm undecided if I should tell my ex or not.

 

Part of me thinks that my ex would be upset at me dating someone new. I'm not sure if he still has feelings for me or not, although I don't have feelings for him any longer, and I'm not sure if I should tell him or wait for him to ask me about my new relationship. I don't have any romantic interest in my ex, but I do care about his feelings. Should I tell him or just let it go?

 

Also, is two months too soon to be dating someone new? I feel my new boyfriend is not a rebound and we have more in common than my ex and I do, and I'm having a great time with him. I'm just big on etiquette with this sort of thing for some reason, even though I wouldn't care if my ex was seeing someone new.

 

 

i am big on etiquette too, i believe in the theory if you truly care about someone you are truthful with them .I would tell because thats what I do.i would hope my ex would be happy for me ,ultimately if he isnt then ......that isnt my concern ...i did the right thing, and as far as igo i have three girls to my ex ,their welfare is high on my list and, i am selective my ex knows this, last time i dated informed him i was dating.none of those dates however got to meet the girls it actually wasnt pleasant dating......i still follow the same etiquette....my ex does know i am interested in someone and that i will probably start dating others next year....i feel ready too albeit a bit hesitant.....deb

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.... Don't say anything. I think its a little rude to do something like that. Basically like a "look at me I moved on I'm happy " kind of thing. You shouldn't have contact .

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I'd be totally turned off if my new boyfriend felt the need to inform his ex we are now dating. So...from that perspective...I vote "no". Personally I wouldn't get involved with someone who was still that concerned about their exes fragile feelings though...and I think "etiquette" is a really random excuse.

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todreaminblue

its not an excuse for me,seems like normal behaviour I dont have feelings for rmy ex , but if he asks how my dating is going i tell him, at one point or another its possible my ex and a possible partner are going to meet i dont have a problem with that...i have three girls so possible weddings or drop off and pick ups when they go for holidays...i dont have a problem with my ex talking to a new partner either, i think problems crop up when you hide things......i choose not to out of etiquette and the ability to be open...its no random excuse or haha i have moved on its not about that........i find it more uncomfortable to hide things actually.....i am not good at it..i think it isnt bad to say hey im dating someone that person is going to spend time with the girls.....it needs to be done...no excuses...definitely not random......deb

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writingmachine

I can see if my ex would see this as rubbing it in, which is not my intention, but I don't think it's wrong to be caring about his feelings if we're still on good terms. I'll probably compromise on this and not tell him, but if he brings it up at all I'll be honest with him. I've always been big on etiquette, so it's not random or an excuse for anything. I do appreciate everyone's input though.

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I can see if my ex would see this as rubbing it in, which is not my intention, but I don't think it's wrong to be caring about his feelings if we're still on good terms. I'll probably compromise on this and not tell him, but if he brings it up at all I'll be honest with him. I've always been big on etiquette, so it's not random or an excuse for anything. I do appreciate everyone's input though.

 

I believe the only circumstances in which to tell him are if he asked you directly. I'm assuming you don't have children/property together so there's no reason to maintain any kind of relationship with exes in my opinion.

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.... Don't say anything. I think its a little rude to do something like that. Basically like a "look at me I moved on I'm happy " kind of thing. You shouldn't have contact .

This, just keep NC

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Were you friends with your ex before you dated? How long was the relationship? If you were friends before and dated briefly but remained good friends then maybe I would mention casually, but wouldn't go into details. If you were not good friends before dating, regardless if the relationship was long or short, I don't know what's keeping you together as friends. He can't never be only your friend, he will always want more. In that case if you want to spare him any hard feelings pull back and don't mention your new bf.

Good luck.

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