Tomy Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 I love my girlfriend more than anyone else but am still in contact with Ex-girlfriends or Ex-lovers of mine. It hurts her when we meet up with women I have slept at some point. Unfortunately, a few of these people are among my oldest and dearest friends. Am I being selfish? Link to post Share on other sites
hoopsy32 Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 Maybe she feels a little insecure? I know I do sometimes and I'm sure a lot of girls do... I don't really know if its really being selfish, you knew them before you knew your girlfriend right? Maybe after time she'll come around and be ok with it. How long have you two been together? Link to post Share on other sites
Tomy Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 Hi We have been together for almost one and a half years. I adore her and love her more than I have ever loved anyone else. I literally begged her to move in with me as I just love hanging out with her. She's great. The problem is that she would have never had a one night stand and can't understand how I could EVER just jump in bed with someone I don't really know or worse (in her opinion) with one of my dearest friends!! Unfortunately, these friends of mine have stuck around for often more than ten years and unfortunately belong to my dear circle of friends. My girlfriend says it makes her sick to imagine how I did all these things with them and that she can't really have respect for a girl who jumps in bed with her oldest friend. Therefore, she is a little reserved when she meets friends I have slept with. Link to post Share on other sites
Bad Hair Posted October 21, 2003 Share Posted October 21, 2003 Hi I read your other posts and I think that your girlfriend is over reacting. I mean, you don't give her any reasons to be insecure but love her and want to be with her (even asked her to move in). These people are your past and are an important part of your life. Your girlfriend shouldn't give you a hard time about this! Link to post Share on other sites
jalexy Posted October 21, 2003 Share Posted October 21, 2003 i actually wouldnt be able to understand such a situation. i probably wouldnt date you because it just seems too weird. so i dont really blame your gf. its really not fair to her. why do you still have friendships with these girls and why are you not with them? Link to post Share on other sites
midori Posted October 21, 2003 Share Posted October 21, 2003 ... and the merit of her own feelings. If "your girlfriend" doesn't feel comfortable with what "you" are doing, she needs to be upfront with you about it, and believe in herself enough to stand her ground. Trying to get inside "your" head to figure out what may or may not be in your heart and mind isn't going to do "your girlfriend" any good... if you see what I mean. When you don't like something your partner is doing, you need to have enough faith in your own sense of reason, and in the strength of your relationship to speak out about it. If your partner doesn't take you seriously, you need to make sure that he or she understands that it really is an issue for you. It's better to have an open discussion about this than to try to figure out what might be their perspective. You know you're a reasonable, undemanding sort of person. You believe in your partner's integrity and intentions. This is just something the two of you don't see eye to eye about. So why not figure out exactly where you stand, and why, and then have an open discussion about it? Link to post Share on other sites
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