TMORRISON Posted June 14, 2003 Share Posted June 14, 2003 I AM 23 YRS OLD AND JUST FOUND OUT THAT I AM PREGNANT . THE PERSON I WAS SEEING HAS DROPPED OUT OF MY LIFE SINCE HE FOUND OUT I WAS PREGNANT. HE NOT ONLY WANTS ME TO HAVE AN ABORTION BUT WANTS ME TO PAY FOR IT TOO. HE SAID AS OF TODAY I BETTER FIND SOME MONEY FAST BECAUSE HE IS LEAVING IN A MONTH AND AFTER THAT I'M ON MY OWN. I DONT WANT TO GO THROUGH AN ABORTION BUT I AM AFRAID BECAUSE MY ONLY FAMILY IS MY MOTHER WHO CANNOT OFFER MUCH HELP, I AM A FULL TIME COLLEGE STUDENT, AND I AM SCARED I WON'T BE ABLE TO MAKE IT. I HAVE HIS PERSONAL INFORMATION BUT NO SOCIAL SECURITY # AND SINCE HE IS LEAVING THE STATE I'M AFRAID I WON'T BE ABLE TO FIND HIM FOR EVEN CHILD SUPPORT. I WANTED TO KNOW IF A MOTHER CAN FILE FOR CHILD SUPPORT WHILE PREGNANT AND IF SO HOW DO I DO THAT? OR AM I JUST OUT OF LUCK AT THIS POINT Link to post Share on other sites
Just A Girl2 Posted June 15, 2003 Share Posted June 15, 2003 I am so sorry that you're going through this. That guy is one very sorry excuse for a human being. First of all, take a deep breath. Nothing is hopeless at this point. You just have to get more information, find out your options and find out your rights here. I did a quick search on the search engine Google (click here) , I typed into the search box: single moms support groups and came up with a whole lot of helpful websites for you. For instance: SingleMoms.org (click here) ....seems like a fantastic site with all kinds of helpful links, for instance, check out the link near the top titled "Resources"..gives ALL KINDS of info on adoption, suing for child support (and all kinds of related agencies that help single moms and moms-to-be find out how to go about locating the father, and getting him to pay child support, etc). Also, there's a Message Board there, called "Mom to Mom", here's the link: Mom to Mom message board (click here) Here's another awesome website, called "Single Parents Network" : SingleParentsNetwork.com (click here) Tons of helpful links on that site, including another (what appears to be) a whole host of various helpful forums: Single Parent Moms Message Boards (click here) (you'll see there's a forum there specifically for "20 somethings Single Moms"..where you can likely get advice from other gals who've been (or are in) your boat). On the main page of this above site, you'll also see on the RIGHT hand side, "Directory"..which has all kinds of links to all kinds of topics that you might want to read up on: like Adoption, Child Support, Investigate and Search (I assume this is in regards to tracking down deadbeat dads). Please don't lose hope. There are many resources out there that can help you. I'm sure you'll get lots of good and helpful information from websites like these 2 above........and you can meet gals online who've gone through the same fears/problems/concerns/feeling abandoned/etc. I wish you the very best in whatever you choose. JAG2 Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted June 15, 2003 Share Posted June 15, 2003 You need to talk to a lawyer ASAP. Child support laws vary by state, but I'm pretty sure (not positive) that you can't get child support until you establish that he is the father, either by him signing the birth certificate (which isn't going ot happen), or through a court ordered DNA test after the baby is born. However, if he is going to vanish into thin air, there may be something you can legally do now. Talk to a lawyer. Link to post Share on other sites
flower Posted June 15, 2003 Share Posted June 15, 2003 Besides talking to a lawyer, think carefully whether you can afford to take care of the baby if not, what you must do now....It's no joke knowing you cannot take good care of the baby if it is born. You will make a big mess of both of your lives. Best wishes. Link to post Share on other sites
Just A Girl2 Posted June 16, 2003 Share Posted June 16, 2003 Sorry folks, just wanting to bump this post to the top, or at least to the first page ...in case TMORRISON is new and wonders where her post went to. Hoping she comes back to read the responses. JAG Link to post Share on other sites
NEONINK Posted June 17, 2003 Share Posted June 17, 2003 Consider adoption, and adoption agency can also help. Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted June 17, 2003 Share Posted June 17, 2003 don't know if this will help with trying to get your child's father to help you while you're pregnant, but the folks involved in the Gabriel Project help women in crisis pregancies. Go to http://www.gabrielproject.com -- and there is a link called "pregnancy centers online" that will get you hooked up with medical care, etc. don't dispair over your situation, TM, there are a lot of people out there who are able to help you through your pregnancy and afterward. The Gabriel Project is an outreach ministry coordinated by the Catholic Church to help women like you, who find themselves in a crisis pregnancy with no resources. This is a relatively new ministry, but from what I understand, these folks will help out however you need help. There are also Birthright and Birthway centers who help pregnant women, also, so don't be afraid to ask. Good luck, and remember, we're here to help, as well. jo anne Link to post Share on other sites
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