belle1861 Posted October 6, 2009 Share Posted October 6, 2009 hello all i have a dear friend going though her own hell right now, she is very in love and happy with the man she meet on line in a music site. not dating one.. anyway here is the thing, she believes him when he told her the was an accident, a small fire in this building reached this apt and now he needs a loan of some money , no problem as they are engaged and plan on living together, when he come back from over seas. the thing that is eating her up and messing with her mind is she has heard sooo much about scams and all that and is feeling like maybe she should re think this a liitle. could it be one hell of a cosmic joke that the problem he has is so like other ppls con's ?? and she has given her heart to the dream they have built , what if its true and she doesnt help him in this, what if its not a scam or a con and she loses the one man she has ever really loved ... pl help me on his i dont know what to do to help her..... Link to post Share on other sites
sadintexas Posted October 6, 2009 Share Posted October 6, 2009 First set of questions: How long have they been in a relationship? How long did she know him prior to that? Most importantly...has she met him in person? Link to post Share on other sites
Author belle1861 Posted October 6, 2009 Author Share Posted October 6, 2009 answers they have know each couple mths. been boy friend ect for 3 weeks and no she has not . and that is the worrying part, but its like they are great for each other never seen her so happy and he is not like the guys that try this scam , he is like anyother guy that dates on line, loving , kind , sweet, seems to loved her and wanna to give her everything, you know normal stuff didnt ever push it just asked her to help him and he would send her a check after he was settled, and said when if you cant do i will figure some thing out and taked about them , and coming home and the fun and that he had a gift for her , so i am confused , what you guys thing ?? Link to post Share on other sites
sadintexas Posted October 7, 2009 Share Posted October 7, 2009 When I first read your post, about halfway through it, I thought oh yeah one of those overseas scams. But I didn't want to make an assumption without the answers to the questions I asked. SCAM! It is not right for anyone ANYONE who has been dating someone for three weeks to ask for money like that. Of course he doesn't seem like a scammer. He wouldn't be a good con man if you suspected it would he? And how do you know he isn't like the rest? How many of these scams have you or she personally encountered? NO NO NO NO Emphatically NO Tell her not to do it unless she doesn't want to see her money again. Even if he's on the up and up (which I bet you he's not) it is totally wrong for him to ask her for money right now. Anyone worth their weight would have other sources to turn to. Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted October 7, 2009 Share Posted October 7, 2009 he is not like the guys that try this scam , he is like anyother guy that dates on line, loving , kind , sweet, seems to loved her and wanna to give her everything, That is EXACTLY like every other guy (and gal) who is a scam artist! They HAVE to be loving, kind and sweet, and they HAVE to promise the world...THAT is what they use for bait. I think...if you can't discourage your friend altogether, tell her to ONLY send as much money as she can afford to lose. Also suggest that she keep it in her mind and heart that she probably won't hear from him after he gets her money. And, of course, that she probably won't see a dime of her money ever again. It's difficult to dissuade somebody from doing what they genuinely believe to be a kind-generous-compassionate act. The best you can do for her is to help her be prepared for the worst outcome. And then we all pray for the best outcome. Link to post Share on other sites
sadintexas Posted October 7, 2009 Share Posted October 7, 2009 I should also add that if she really feels he's genuine, she can always say she'd love to help out but simply doesn't have any money to spare. If he's really a good guy (which again I doubt) he'll understand and it won't affect their relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author belle1861 Posted October 10, 2009 Author Share Posted October 10, 2009 hi everyone 1st thank you all for taking the time to reply. yes i know its sounds like a scam to me also. and i told her to be sooo careful and plz do not send him any money. that if he really did love her like he did he would not put this on her shoulders. yes i understand about the guy having to be good at the romance and sweet talk. she told me he asked her to promise to never leave him , that he is a little worried that she is friends with some guys from work and on line. and acts like if he were to lose it would break his heart. he wants them to move into together when he gets back and wants to spend the rest of his life with her. the big thing is he asked her to marry him and she adores this man like crazy in love with him. but i have talked her out of sending him money No matter what and now we shall see what happens to them . story as of yesterday she told him she wasn’t sending him any money at all and told him she was not going to cash any checks . And he told her it wasn’t going to change anything with them and that he loved her ........ so i will get back to ya Link to post Share on other sites
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