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G/f has 2 stalker ex b/f's. What can I do?


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MissingMyHubby

My g/f and I have been seeing each other for 2 months now. Things are going pretty smooth, we are exlusive and both in our late 20s. She also lives 2 hours away.

 

 

Ex b/f 1 of hers:

 

They were on/off for 6 years. He treated her like poop. He is 11 years older than her. He is very maniupulative and sends her texts saying "you new man will never love you like i have." she has no feelings for him and basically tells him to F off, but this isnt stopping him.

 

Ex b/f 2 of hers:

 

Together for a year after the last bf (ex bf #1). He was a big pansy and turned out to be the girl in the relationship according to my gf. He cut himself with a knife over his heart and sent her a pic of it. Threatened to drive to her tonight but she said I was there, (im not) so he turned around. He thinks she is waiting for him but she made it clear she is not.

 

Tonight, my gf unleashes all this garbage on me, telling me what is going on. I first say "what do i say to this? i care, and ill come to you if you want." she kept going on, then i got irritated and said "are u looking for a reaction or what out of me..."

we then talked on the phone for a while and ironed it out a bit. i told her she needs to go to the police and file a report. change her phone # (she doesnt want to though--change her # or email bc they "win.") at the end she said ok i miss you and isaid it back, but my tone was bad, and now i made stuff worse.

 

ugh.

 

what do i do? part of me doesnt wanna deal with this crap but most of me wants to because i care for her and want her to move on from this.

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There needs to be a restraining order in effect. And yes, her cell number should be changed, home number, anything they know. If she doesn't want to like you say, then she needs to be made aware how dangerous this could be. If she still doesn't want to, then the consequences are on her. They both sound like nutjobs. One quick question, if you're a man why is your username "MissingMyHubby?" Just curious.

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EnigmasMuse

You said, your g/f told you she didn't want to change her numbers because if she does, then t"hey win?"

 

No, they WIN when they come after her or something bad happens because she didn't do the right thing. Maybe she likes the attention and thats why she wont change it. She's not thinking to clearly on her safety. :rolleyes:

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I do agree with the advice before me..

 

One thing to note.. the on again off again thing for 6 years..

 

Be careful of not getting all the info from your GF on that guy..

Something tells me that she doesn't want to cut him loose and wants to keep the tie there so she isn't going to be on the up and up about him to you..

They have 6 years together and 10-1 are pretty intertwined in each others lives..

The other guy is just a nutcase and needs an RO on him...

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I am going to go with my gut here. This chick is an attention whore and loves the drama. It you are not up for it then dump her and move on.

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MissingMyHubby

How do I tell if she likes the attention or if she is just an innocent victim of these 2 nutjobs.

 

I want to give her the benefit of the doubt to the 6 year guy because she said he treated her horrible etc etc and I dont want to believe she is keeping him on a string sorta speak.

 

How do I go about saying something without accusing her?

When do I say enough is enough?

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