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noxnoctisangela

So, ya i havent been on here for a while b/c i have been rather busy. Alot of stuff has been going on and i'm not sure what to do. First off i broke up with my bf b/c i just didnt feel the same way for him anymore. It just seemed he never tried and kept making up excuses. Now i have fallen for another guy that lives forever away from me. I met him online and then in rl. After i met him in rl i just fell head over heels for him and he said he likes me to. The thing is that he doesnt want an long distance relationship and he hates being alone so he went back to his abusive ex. She goes through all of his personal stuff and cell phone. Tells him who he can or cannot speak to and calls him up when he is sleeping (works a 12 hour graveyard shift) just to bitch at him b/c he commented on something of mine. (she hates me with an obsessive passion) He and i still talk but we have to do it while he is at work so his gf doesnt catch him. We arent being all lovely dovey or anything we are just generally talking like friends but i know he wants to be with me...he just cant deal with a long distance relationship. I asked him if i had stayed up there with him on a perm basis if he would have gone back to her... he said no.

I cant say i feel bad that we are going behind his gf back to talk when she is acting like a psycho. Though i hate to say it but i am in love with him...i dont even care if he dates me or not i just dont want him to be with her b/c she makes him unhappy and i know its his choice but it still hurts to see him like that. He has admit to me that he is scared to take a chance with me b/c he doesnt want to get hurt. With her, he is use to being dumped by her then several days later she comes back and I dont think that is right the way she is treating him. I dont know what to do...people should say i should give up on him and i have tried dating other guys but my heart still holds on to him. I cant stop thinking about him and i knows he thinks about me to b/c he is always looking at my webpage and answering my calls...ha we own each other souls and havent given up that even when he went back to his ex...i'm soo lost on what to do. sorry for the long post....

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