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Quality Versus Quantity


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A simple scenario:

 

Men would you . . .

 

(A) Date a woman with zero relationship experience -i.e. never been in a single relationship; Quantity dismissed -but has an extraordinary sense of character and definitely surpasses your expectations of a Quality woman.

 

OR

 

(B) Date a woman with numerous past relationships -i.e. possesses strong relationship experience due to Quantity -but her substance lacking character doesn't intrigue you and as a result doesn't meet your expectations of a Quality woman.

 

Honest answers. Men and women are welcome to comment/contribute.

 

Sand&Water

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RE:

 

Oh, I should have included: and Why?

 

Assume both women are equally beautiful/gorgeous/pretty/whatever-floats-your-boat.

 

This thread may seem pathetic. But part feedback would be appreciated.

 

Sand&Water

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InsanityImpaired

A. B = more chance of serious past issues screwing up the present. Quality is what counts more in the present, than quantity of the past.

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A simple scenario:

 

Men would you . . .

 

(A) Date a woman with zero relationship experience -i.e. never been in a single relationship; Quantity dismissed -but has an extraordinary sense of character and definitely surpasses your expectations of a Quality woman.

 

OR

 

(B) Date a woman with numerous past relationships -i.e. possesses strong relationship experience due to Quantity -but her substance lacking character doesn't intrigue you and as a result doesn't meet your expectations of a Quality woman.

 

Honest answers. Men and women are welcome to comment/contribute.

 

Sand&Water

 

Not that I'm in the market for a woman, but I'm just interested to know what traits would make woman A have a higher quality of character than woman B. Thinking of positive qualities I associate with strong/excellent character, courage, honesty, compassion and wisdom spring quickly to mind. On the other hand, I'm guessing that most people believe themselves to be in possession of those qualities.

 

Some people surprise you with the strength of character they show in adverse circumstances, and others disappoint you with their lack of character when it counts. What clues would the guy tasked with making this choice be given in order to help him establish which woman would be the better long term bet?

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bluescreenlife

I'd definitely take A, but that's not without its pitfalls. Speaking as someone who was the male version of A going into his last relationship, I had a lot to learn and I definitely made mistakes. I might personally like A because I can empathize with people who don't date much, but it does take some patience to be with someone like that.

 

I'm not too into B, though experience is definitely a good thing. I like to think that depth of experience can teach you as much as breadth, so quantity might not be necessary (I hope)... but if you're talking about a lot of quantity it's probably someone who doesn't take relationships as seriously as I tend to. And as for lack of character... that makes it a pretty easy decision if you can pick up on it.

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A. would be the more logical answer, but not without it's demons too. B. seems to me to be very damaged goods, however the experience in multiple relationships is a big plus for B.

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A of course..

 

The problem with a B woman though is that you wouldn't know about her "substance lacking character" until you were sucked in.. by then it would be too late for you to get out.. ( as in my ex from 2 years ago.. ).

 

B Women always have the hindsight being 20/20 feeling after the relationship falls apart and your find out about her "substance lacking character"

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A, definitely. Although, as people have said, that does not come without its downsides. Someone who has been in a relationship in the past not only has more physical experience, but also, and more importantly, learns the skills that makes relationships work. In my previous relationship, I learned a good deal of patience, how to apologize with humility, how to settle arguments gracefully, and to speak my mind, never assuming the other person knows my thoughts.

 

Now, my current boyfriend and I are certainly much more compatible, but I'm also certain that my experience in my last relationship has helped things run so smoothly. It's also helped me appreciate, that much more, what I've got right now :love:

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