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getting through self induced downness


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I have done a terrible thing. I have fallen in love with two men. I have been with my boyfriend for four years and I have known this other fellow for 3 years. He also has a girlfriend and he is actually a friend of ours. I had always been attracted to him and about 1.5 years ago he conveyed to me that he was also attracted to me. I fought every urge I had to get close to him however we started talking on the internet even though he only lives in the next building. About 1 year ago he kissed me and stuff. I should have walked away then but I liked him and I also was friends with him. Since then we have kept in touch mostly be email because his girlfriend will not let him hang out with his friends anymore because none of us care for her. She is rude to everyone. He has lost all of his friends now because of her. Anyways, our conversations turned more intimate and we both started to use pet names for each other therby getting closer in that such way. The creme de la creme though is that last night we met and now i feel horrible about the whole thing. I care for him and he cares for me but we have agreed to stay with our partners and stop all forms of conversation except strictly friendshipwise. I agree with this and I feel extremely awefull about what happened. Please dont put me down because of this because I am already doing that 100 times over to myself. What i really need are some coping skills to get through the loss of him and the enthusiasm i used to have for my boyfriend.

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