Giving things back?

[Flipper]

When you break up with your partner, is it wise to return things he or she gave to you? I've been told that it's kind of an immature thing to do but I feel that having those things in your home doesn't help with the healing process. I tried to put everything in a box and put it away but that didn't work. Just knowing that it's still inside my house brings back too many memories which I don't want to remember! It's even worst for me because I feel that I was the cause of the break up which kills me tremendously. How would you react if you received a package containing all the gifts, cards and little momentos your ex has given you? Would you feel hurt, angry or just a nonchalant,"Who Cares, it's his or her loss not mine!" I need some advice!

[Tony T]

1. "When you break up with your partner, is it wise to return things he or she gave to you?"

 

No, nothing wise about it at all. When you quit a job, do you give them back all the paychecks they gave you?

 

2. "How would you react if you received a package containing all the gifts, cards and little momentos your ex has given you?"

 

I would feel the ex was extremely immature and it would make me feel better about the break up.

 

There are many things you can do with the sentimental things an ex has given you. You can throw them away, give them to charity, pass them along to friends who can use them, or just store them away as momentos for times when things aren't so emotionally charged.

 

Remember, things that were given during a romance were given from the heart...at the time. Things change. Milk spoils, cars get run down, batteries go dead, and often relationships go sour. But that doesn't mean there weren't some really good times too.

 

Returning things that were given with the very best of intentions at the time is just plain childish and cruel. Again, there are many ways to get these things out of sight and out of the way of the healing process without being a baby about it.