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20 year old girl/ 30 year old guy??


wondering

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What do people think of a 20 year old girl going out with a 30 year old guy? Is it wrong because of the age and experience gap?

In my humble opinion, what "people" think is absolutely irrelevant. The question is what do you think, or better yet, what do you feel? Check the motivation, if you are the male, is your motivation based on actual concern and attraction for the other, or are you looking for someone that you feel dominant over and can manipulate. This is often the case in these relationships. If you are the female, again first measure concern for the other. Then ask yourself, are you looking for someone to take care of you? Age is not so important in a relationship as is the motivation of that relationship, once you look at your motivation, communicate that honestly and openly with your partener, that is what you want from this relationship. Encourage them to respond, if your motivations are compatable, then go for it, if not, se la vi. Beware, if your partener is uncomfortable or elusive with this response, or if you feel that they are not being honest, chances are that they are not. Should this be the case, they probably do not have the "best intentions" in this relationship.

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There is nothing wrong with it, except to the extent that the younger has much more to gain in knowledge and experience from the older. I suppose the trade-off is the older having a much younger chick by his side.

 

As this couple gets older, the age gap will be more and more insignificant. If both of you are happy and having fun, who cares?

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A very good friend of mine is in a similar relationship. She is 23 and he is 30+ with children, but devoriced. I have a really hard time with the whole thing. I cannot understand why the relationship exists.

 

Maybe its because I see other intentions in his eyes. There is definitely a differentiation of ideas at this level. At least in this particular instance. I am not a psychologist but, I think there is an ego issue at stake here. An older man with an attractive younger woman has a huge ego bust coming. Be very careful and warey.

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